Devil's Backbone
by sincerelysophie
Summary: Julianne Potter just barely lived through the First Wizarding World. The death of her twin brother and his wife would have been hard enough if the man she loved wasn't responsible for it, if he hadn't killed one of their best friends, if she hadn't been left pregnant and alone. Starting in PoA with flashbacks to the Marauder Era. Sirius x OC with hints of Remus x OC
1. Escape

**A/N: This is a slightly AU fic. I have no idea how to define it. It follows along the main plot, but I think the addition of an aunt on James' side of Harry's family will automatically skew it a bit.**

**Chapter One: Escape**

"_JAMES!" _Jules woke up in a cold sweat again. Her heart was pounding in her chest and her black hair was plastered across her forehead. She ran her hands across her face and did what she always did after having a bad dream. She shuffled from her bedroom to the next one down the hall and quietly opened the door. She made her way to her daughter's twin bed and pushed the black curls off of her forehead. After planting a kiss there, Jules made her way back to her bed and stared at the ceiling before trying to close her eyes again.

Julianne Potter had been incomplete for nearly 12 years. After her twin had been murdered, and her fiancé charged with the crime, she was broken. Nightmares had plagued her almost every night. When she was younger, her nightmares could always be comforted by her other half. Every bad dream left her aching for a life long gone and her brother, her James. Just as Jules' eyes began to drift shut, there was a banging on the door.

"Kingsley?" Jules pulled her bathrobe tighter around her as she adjusted her glasses on her nose. "What on earth are you doing here? Come in..." The towering auror walked into her tiny flat and made the entire place feel more cramped than the Burrow at Christmas. The silence filled the apartment

"Julianne, I regret to inform you that Sirius Black is on the loose," Kingsley Shacklebolt's voice echoed around in her brain before the words finally resonated. Her head started spinning and her hand reached for the rings dangling on a chain around her neck. Kingsley lead her towards the arm chair and sat her down.

"He escaped from Azkaban," Jules whispered. "He-" She took off her glasses and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I haven't told Harry about him, and I haven't said a word to Lucy... I can't- how am I supposed to-" Tears burned in the corners of her eyes. A thought clicked in her exhausted brain.

"You're here to search the place," Jules said as she placed her glasses back on. "You think I'm hiding the man responsible for James and Lily's deaths... Here? With my 11 year old daughter?"

Kingsley stared at his feet. He tugged at the sleeve of his robe and then said, "You're the first person he'd look for, Jules, it wouldn't make sense not to-"

Creaks on the floorboards made the two adults jump. In the hall was a slender little girl with a head of wild black curls and striking grey eyes. She stared at the auror and her mother with a look of confusion.

"What's he looking for, mum?" Her voice cut through the tension like a knife. Jules got up and walked towards her daughter. She wrapped an arm around her daughter's shoulders and then did something she had never done. She lied to her child.

"This is my old friend Kingsley, Lucy-goose," Jules said. "He's just here to make sure I'm not hiding any muggles for illegal magic testing." Jules kissed the top of her daughter's head. "I'll make some tea, alright, love? Just sit on the sofa where I can see you."

Jules met Kingsley's eyes for a moment and the two made a mutual agreement in that look to never speak of the lie that had just been told. Kingsley searched the flat with a location spell and Jules found chocolate just in case the dementors were the next unwelcome visitors she'd have to deal with at this hour.

_**11 years ago...**_

_Remus Lupin walked into the psychiatric ward of St. Mungo's with a bunch of haphazardly collected lilacs. He knew that Jules loved lilacs and hoped it might bring a bit of joy to the pale blank walls of Mungo's. The nurses all watched him carefully as he went to the room that was visited only by two other wizards: Dumbledore and Molly Weasley. _

_Inside the dark room, Remus saw the silhouette of a now-quite pregnant Julianne. She was sitting in the windowsill watching the life occurring outside the barred, enchanted glass. Her hair was cropped short so that she didn't pull it out and her eyes had dark circles under them. He saw her shoulders tense as she registered his footsteps into the room._

"_James won't come to visit, Remus," Her words shook and her hazel eyes met his amber ones. They didn't have the vivacity that they used to. "They won't even let me see Harry." _

_Remus placed the flowers at her bedside table and walked over to the window. The nurses had told him that it helped to remind her of the life inside of her. He thought it helped to remind her that she wasn't alone, no matter how isolated she felt. They said she cried for James and Lily a lot in the night. They said she started throwing things if they brought up him, but she wouldn't take off the ring. Remus placed a hand on her arm. Jules' eyes were staring at him but not registering him as there. _

"_How's the baby doing in there?" He smiled half-heartedly at the shell of the girl he knew and loved. He knew better than to try and feel her stomach. He'd ended up with a bruise the last time he tried. Silence. "I brought you lilacs, Julie... I know how much you loved picking lilacs at your parents' house around this time of year." Tears started to well up in her eyes. They fell without struggle down each cheek._

"_Don't cry, love," Remus said gently. He helped Jules out of the windowsill and hugged her as tightly as possible with her protruding belly. "Shh..." He stroked her head and let the fragile creature crumble into his arms. He knew it was only a matter of time before she became so overwhelmed with grief that she would dissociate again. He let her feel and scream and beat his chest with her tiny fists. Remus sat her down on her bed and let her rage at the injustice the world had done to her. _

_He visited her four times a week, and every week was the same. She had stopped fighting her pain and the tears had stopped. Jules lay on her back with her hands balanced on top of her stomach. Remus got up and prepared himself to leave. He liked to think him being here did some good and that maybe he'd walk out of Mungo's one day with at least one of his best friend's still around. Maybe he'd still have a family one day._

"_James won't come to visit, Remus," Jules' voice was distant again. There was a long silence. Remus walked towards the door and placed his hand on the doorknob. The visits always ended like they started._

"_He won't come to visit, because he's dead." Remus' head snapped around to stare at her. She was sitting upright now and staring at him. "Lily. James. They're both gone. I'm alone now... Moony, please don't leave me, too. Don't leave me... I can't do this on my own." _

_Remus took three long strides back to her bed and placed one hand on either side of her face. He kissed the top of her forehead and his eyes began to water. He hadn't heard a word from her for months apart from the two dissociative ones she had mastered for anyone who would listen._

"_I won't, I promise... Oh, Merlin... Jules, Julianne..." He started to laugh, "I'm bloody useless at sticking around!" For the first time in months he saw a smile start to spread across her face. _

"_Well, of course they'd leave me stuck with you! The bastards..." Jules began to laugh and she placed her hands on his shoulders. Tears fell down their cheeks and they laughed and giggled for the first time since the world they had both known and loved fell apart. She leaned his forehead against his and lead one of his hands to her stomach. The baby was kicking with a passion. It was in that moment, that moment of pure light and life amidst the darkness, that Remus and Jules formed a very fragile, very broken patchwork family._


	2. Sibling Rivalry

**A/N: Here's chapter 2... It's a bit more past oriented this time around.**

* * *

**Chapter Two: Sibling Rivalry**

**_Godric's Hollow, The Potter House, July 15th 1976_**

_Julianne was sitting on the plush sofas that her mother adored with her feet curled under her. Her long, unruly hair was tied in a knot at the top of her head as she tried to make it through McGonnagal's assigned transfiguration reading._

_"Do you always steal my shirts?" James' voice called from the stairs. Jules looked down at the soft, plaid flannel shirt she had adopted as her own from her brother's wardrobe and a cheeky grin found itself on her lips._

_"Just the ones you happen to be looking for," She called back. She glanced out the bay window in the corner and watched the snow fall for a moment before turning her attention back to her book. _

_She heard James' feet run down the stairs and he emerged wearing a soft cotton t-shirt. Running his hands through his hair, he made his way straight for the kitchen and came back with an apple. Jules went back to her book. It felt like only a few moments of silence before there was a parade of knocks on the door. The twins shared a look before leaping up from their places and racing towards the door before the house elf could get it. _

_At the door, a very disheveled Sirius with a split lip was grinning back at them carrying a large bag that looked like it contained all of his belongings from 12 Grimmauld Place, which he lovingly referred to as 'hell.' _

_"'Allo you two," His curly hair was sticking to his face with sweat from the heatwave. "I know I'm a bit early, but I figured your parents love me more than you gits, so it wouldn't be a problem."_

_James matched his grin and pulled him into a hug. James ruffled his hair and a wrestling match began in the foyer while Jules closed the door to block out the summer heat. She noticed that Sirius was favouring his right side a little more than he used to. It was just then that there was a loud pop from the living room, distracting all three teenagers, as the Potters, Harold and June, arrived. _

_A beautiful woman, June Potter, with chestnut brown hair and warm hazel eyes behind glasses that matched the twins and a man, her husband Harold, with disheveled black hair with twinkling blue eyes and a mischievous smile came from the living room into the spacious foyer. June's smile only faltered momentarily when she saw Sirius and his bleeding lip standing just in front of the door._

_"Sirius! So glad you're here, darling," June opened up her arms and embraced the tall boy with shaggy black curls. "And what have you done to your lip, love?" Whisking him into the kitchen, June blew kisses over her shoulder to her children and winked as she disappeared mentioning something about her special healing salve._

_"Hello dad," Jules grinned as she hugged her father and planted a kiss on his cheek._

_"Hi dad," James repeated what his twin had just done. Harold wrapped an arm around each of them. James' shoulder was equal to his now, while Julianne was nearly a half foot shorter than the both of them._

_"How long has Sirius been here? D'you know who hit him yet?" Harold pondered aloud as he lead his twins to the living room. James and Jules exchanged a look and struggled to contain their smiles. He was right. They do love him more. _

_In the kitchen, June watched as Sirius flinched with even the lightest pressure on his bruising face. This boy had spent so many summer vacations with the family at James' insistence. She loved him like her own. It was hard not to with the heart of gold he had. _

_"If it's any trouble, Mrs. Potter, you know I can just find somewhere else to-" Sirius began once the mistress of the house noticed his trunk._

_"You'll do no such thing, Sirius," June's hazel eyes twinkled beneath her glasses and her gentle smile spread as she finished applying the salve before wiping her hands on a tea cloth. "You've been moving bits and pieces of yourself here for ages, so now just consider the move complete." She kissed his forehead after standing up from the kitchen table. _

_Sirius had never been loved by his parents like he was loved by the Potters. He was always the black sheep, no pun intended, but here he felt like he truly belonged. Sirius felt his eyes begin to sting, so he stood up and put on his best charming face. He headed towards the sofa where Jules had her feet propped up on James' lap and Harold was traipsing around the lounge as though they were still small children. _

_As he approached the sofa, Jules' feet found themselves on the floor which left perfect room for Sirius to plop himself down. Jules' hazel eyes subconsciously followed him to his place until James caught her line of sight and raised his eyebrow. Her head snapped back around to her father and the three of them listened as Harold Potter tried his hardest to lighten the fact that they would soon be fighting against these 'Death Eaters' and it would be their responsibility to defeat the 'Dark Lord.' _

_June popped her head out of the kitchen, "Butterbeer, my darlings? I hope you aren't ruining their vacation already, Harold. You've got the rest of their break to do that!" _

_"Of course not, love," Harold shot an award-winning smile at his wife and sat down in his armchair. Later on, June would snap a picture of the twins and Sirius sitting on the very same couch. It featured a sleeping Jules with her head rested against Sirius' chest and her legs draped across her twin. _

* * *

**_London, July 1993_**

"Coming! I'm coming," Jules ran to the door. Her glasses were pushed back on her head and, as she opened the door, she had a flash to a similar heatwave years ago when a different black-haired boy had showed up at her doorstep. It was late and the summer air had cooled down considerably from the midday heat.

"Hi Aunt Julie," Harry's glasses were crooked on his face and his hair was all over the place. He had a large trunk and his owl beside him. He sounded exactly like his father, Jules thought.

"Was she really _that _awful?" Jules smiled as she helped him into the flat. Harry told her all about the awful Aunt Marge while Jules closed and locked the door. She opened up her arms and wrapped them around her nearly teenage nephew. "Well, don't worry, love. I'll sign your Hogsmeade letter." She ruffled his hair and placed a kiss on the top of his head.

"You don't think I'll get kicked out of Hogwarts for using magic?" Her nephew's green eyes were wide with apparent anxiety.

"Well, I think Dumbledore will be very understanding," Jules said as she summoned a pot of tea. "Besides, he should know as well as anyone that James was far, _far_ from a drunk."

"Another thing happened while I was trying to get here," Harry's voice began to quiver. The tone in his voice made her freeze. She'd gone to the Dursleys' house following Kingsley's visit to her flat because, while she didn't think Lucy needed to know, Harry was a potential target of the man that had killed his parents. "I thought I saw a black dog, like the one you warned me of."

The teapot crashed. Jules couldn't be bothered with_ repairo_ as it lay broken on the coffee table. He'd done it. He'd found Harry, and he'd come for her next.

* * *

**_The Potter Manor, Christmas 1976_**

_"Must he always bring home the catch of the day?" Jules muttered as she stabbed at a brussels sprout on her plate. James looked across the table at Sirius' current girlfriend, Hestia Jones, who seemed nice enough. _

_"You must admit, she's much better than Emmeline Vance," James offered. "Besides, it won't last long. It never does. Better question is why do you care?" He cut up a piece of turkey and raised an eyebrow at his sister._

_"Why do you keep chasing after Lily Evans?" Jules reached for her glass of pumpkin juice, then added. "I don't care." _

_Christmas at the Potters' was a crowded event. Wizarding families from all over came to visit. Molly and Arthur Weasley were there with their two young boys, Bill and Charlie. Work friends of their parents, and all three other Maurauders were there. James looked up and down the large dining table and grinned at his twin._

_"Oh, Julie," He said. "You're not fooling anyone you know. Besides, Evans will come to her senses eventually. I'm irresistible." _

_"An irresistible twat," Remus piped in from his other side. Jules snorted up her pumpkin juice and reached behind James for a high five from Remus. _

_"And how is your furry little problem, Remus?" James countered. Suddenly, Sirius' girlfriend spoke up for the first time all dinner._

_"Is this the rabbit I keep hearing about?" She smiled. Jules plastered on a grin as her eyes traced the path Sirius' arm made for Hestia's shoulders. His lopsided smile looked cheeky as ever._

_"Yes, it's a wonderful rabbit, really," Peter chimed in. Remus shot daggers at James with his eyes. Sirius laughed and pulled Hestia back to him. Jules couldn't watch anymore. While Sirius leaned in to kiss the girl, Julianne excused herself with 'nausea' and went upstairs._

_Moments after hiding away in her room, there was a knock on her bedroom door. _

_"Go 'way," Jules called from the back of her closet. She'd often hid there during major events when the Maurauders got too carried away with their pranks. She heard the door open. _

_"You are awful, Julianne Potter," Sirius' voice curled its way around the room. He leaned against the doorway of her closet. "You know, if you took the time to get to know her, Hestia is a great girl. She's way better than Emmy was. I think you'd like each other. It's Christmas, for Merlin's sake." _

_"I told you not to come in," Jules groaned as she stood up to push him out of her safe spot. _

_Sirius stuck his tongue out at her. "You know, Muggles believe that Christmas is about the birth of a demi-god in a barn or something... He was a nice bloke according to Evans, healed the blind and the zombies, so no one should be mean on his birthday." _

_"Get ouuuut," Jules used her shoulder to try and push him out of her room. Sirius finally let out a sigh and grabbed both of her shoulders._

_"I will leave as soon as you tell me why you hate my girlfriends so much," his grey eyes pierced into her hazel ones. "Because I'll tell you something, you've got nothing against your twin's conquests and he's your other half, so what is it?" _

_"I don't hate your girlfriends," Jules pouted defiantly. "I have nothing against them. I'm just not a fan of public displays of affection." Sirius rolled his eyes and stepped away from her._

_"_You _don't like public displays of affection?" He laughed. "Come off it, Jules. I have one thing to say to you and that is Frank Longbottom." _

_"Oh, please!" Jules said in disgust. "Frank Longbottom was _nothing_ in comparison to the parades of girls you come out of the broom cupboard with. Let me just start with Frank's current girlfriend, Alice. Or what about the months I had to watch you fish your tongue out of Emmeline's throat? Even after she insulted me!" _

_"She did not insult you, Jules," Sirius pushed his long hair out of his face and shook his head. "You just took everything that came out of her mouth as an insult." _

_"Because someone as bloody stupid as her is an insult to Hogwarts and the human race!" Jules poked his chest. "I don't have to like everyone you choose to have fun with, and I don't have to explain myself to you!" _

_Downstairs, the dinner party had mostly moved into the living room. James, Remus, Peter and Hestia sat awkwardly at the empty table listening to the raising volume of Sirius and Jules' voices cascading down the stairs. _

_"Should we-" Hestia started to ask looking at Sirius' three best friends. The argument had escalated and doors had been repeatedly slammed. They could hear the voices clearly traveling from one room upstairs to another._

_"It's probably best not to," James said. "Julianne is not known for her restraint when her temper flares up." He looked at the nervous, dejected expression on the girl's face. "Listen, Jones, it's really nothing personal. They fight like this all the time since he moved in... It's like... You know, uh-" _

_"Sibling rivalry?" Peter suggested. _

_"Yeah, sibling rivalry." James nodded. "We get along so well, she has to get that whole 'difficult sister' thing out on someone in the house, ya know?" Remus rolled his eyes. Sibling rivalry was not exactly the way to put the raging arguments that had occurred between Jules and Sirius since he moved in to the Potters, but Remus was not exactly going to be the first to say it._

_"Are you absolutely sure we shouldn't go up there?" Hestia said before resuming chewing her bottom lip. There was a dull thud, and then the sound of glass breaking._

_Remus, Peter and James shared a look and said, "Nah... Best not." A silence fell over the four. It took a moment for everyone to realize that a silence had fallen upstairs too. Suddenly, they all jumped up from their places and headed up the stairs. _

_"Jules? Padfoot? Everything alright up-" James opened one of the doors that had clearly been slammed. After peaking his head inside, he quickly closed it and spun around pressing his back against the door. _

_"What's wrong?" Hestia said. She tried to reach around him from the doorknob but James grabbed her wrist._

_"Nothing, nothing at all," James put on a forced grin. He started walking her back down stairs and spun her around. Remus mouthed 'What?' and while Hestia wasn't looking James threw a panicked look at him that revealed everything. _

_Behind Peter, the door reopened and Julianne came out smoothing down her shirt and attempting to straighten her hair. Sirius came out after and barreled through her over to Peter. _

_"What was your fight about?" Peter asked. _

_"Nothing," Sirius and Jules said simultaneously. Sirius cleared his throat and headed back to Hestia. Remus turned to face Jules. _

_"You know what James told that poor girl?" He asked her. Jules refused to look him in the eye._

_"Something about sibling rivalry, probably," Jules said monotonously. She pushed past him trying to keep her composure. Whatever had just happened was something she was never going to talk about again. Remus watched, open-mouthed, as she apologized to Hestia in front of everyone before Jules moved herself as far away from the couple as possible. Sibling rivalry wasn't the right word for it. Not even close._


	3. Happy Birthday, Harry

**Chapter Three: Happy Birthday, Harry**

**_London, July 31st 1982_**

_Jules had strapped a tiny, 6 week old baby Lucy to her chest in a baby sling that Molly Weasley had given to her. Her hair had grown just long enough now that it stuck out at all angles and made her look like her twin more than she had since they were babies. Despite her pregnancy, Jules looked drawn. Her cheekbones protruded as though she'd barely eaten. She looked delicate and fragile, but her eyes portrayed a fierceness that most of the wizards who cleared her path recognized as volatile. _

_"Why? Why can't I have him?" Jules slammed down reams of parchment she had filed for this very occasion. "I'm as much blood as Petunia is, and I am far, far more loving." _

_The witch in the Department for Protection of Magical Children looked at the frightening woman across the desk at her. In the red sling around her chest, a small fist began to squirm and struggle. A small whimper sounded an immediate response from Julianne. The witch adjusted her robes and started to sift through the various forms regarding the formal adoption of Harry James Potter, the boy who lived. Jules placed one arm gently under the swing and placed the baby's fist back in its place. She began rocking in place and ran her left hand through her hair revealing the glint of three rings stacked in place on her ring finger from largest to smallest. _

_"Well, Ms. Potter," The witch cleared her throat and stroked her jaw. "You were only released from St. Mungo's psychiatric centre a few months ago, and-" The witch's ice blue eyes flitted to the baby sling. "You've recently had a quite large addition to your own household. The Ministry must take its time in considering this case as, you know, he's not just any small magical child in a muggle household. He's there because of a protection spell."_

_"They're not feeding him properly," Jules clenched and unclenched her left fist. "He's in a house where he is resented as another mouth to feed! I would love him unconditionally, and that love would be as strong as his mother's- the love that protected him!" _

_The witch began to arrange the parchment in an orderly fashion with her wand. She stood up and walked over to Julianne. _

_"Ms. Potter," She said. Her pale blue robes hung to the floor and she looked like a girl from Beauxbatons. "I hope you understand that really we are not trying to question your parenting skills. It is simply a matter of circumstance. At this time, we cannot grant you clearance to have custody over the boy. He is the great hope for us, and we cannot risk anything." The baby began to wail and Jules lifted her out of the sling like she was made of porcelain._

_"Got quite a head of hair for a baby so young," The ministry witch smiled at the thick tuft of black curls atop the little bundle. _

_"Takes after her father," Jules said softly as she cradled the baby to her chest. After Lucy quieted down, Jules placed her back into the sling and said, "I expect to see you again soon." _

_The dangerous glint in Julianne's hazel eyes just before the door closed inspired a letter to Albus Dumbledore as soon as the head of the Department for Protection of Magical Children was left alone._

* * *

**_4 Privet Drive, July 31st 1983_**

_As soon as the doorbell rang, Petunia knew that it had to be trouble. Nothing good ever arrived at her doorstep on the 31st of any month since her sister had died. It was just like Lily to leave her stuck with two small children instead of one. She always got the short end of the stick, even now that her sister, beloved Lily, was gone. _

_The door swung open and on the steps of Number 4 Privet Drive was a man with long-ish sandy brown hair and three scars that disfigured the left side of his face. His eyes were an amber colour that left Petunia with a somewhat unsettled feeling in her stomach, but his smile was kind and warm. He was carrying a gift bag and a diaper bag. Beside him was a woman with disheveled shoulder-length black hair and twinkling hazel eyes behind a pair of glasses. She had high cheekbones and a pointed nose that matched the man Petunia's younger sister had married. She held a toddler with a mess of black curls and storm grey eyes in her arms. The toddler resembled Harry, Petunia's sister's boy, except for the eyes and the hair. _

_"Hello Petunia," Jules grinned as she stepped inside the house. She looked around and noticed that there weren't any balloons or decorations hung. The house smelled like breakfast, not birthday cake. Petunia looked shocked and appalled by the two virtual strangers stepping into her home. "You've met Remus before, haven't you?" Jules placed down the toddler who teetered on her feet before gripping onto her mother's leg._

_"Julianne, I- Well, I can't say that I was expecting a house call," Petunia scanned the street to make sure that no one saw the odd couple walk into her house before she closed the door. Her long neck and sharp features made her appear quite bird-like. _

_"It's Harry's birthday," Remus noted the slight venom in Jules' words. She had fought so hard to get the boy. She had spent every waking hour. She had a room in her flat for him. She had toys, books, photos that she longed to share with the child. Jules wanted nothing more than to love the boy, but instead he had to stay in a house where they forgot it was his birthday. _

_"Oh! Oh, of course," Petunia stumbled over her words. Petunia often felt that this woman, this female double of the man who had so insulted her husband and stole her sister away from her, was as scary and volatile as the wizard that murdered her sister. "The boys are just in the living room and Vernon is off at work. I was about to start making a cake for tonight, I-" Petunia leveled her gaze with the woman in her foyer. _

_"Would you like me to make it?" Remus said. It broke the tension between the two women and acted as a distraction. Jules' grin returned to her face with full-force and Petunia smiled nervously. _

_"You two are probably better at making it anyway with your- your special ability," Petunia whispered the last few words as though her neighbours might hear. Petunia's eyes drifted to the small girl holding onto her mother's leg. Her heart ached a little and she reached to touch the soft curls on her head. _

_"Lucy has gotten big," Petunia croaked as she found her mouth suddenly running dry. Jules lifted the toddler back up into her arms and took a deep breath. She smiled at her sister-in-law, the bird-like muggle with the deep-seeded jealousy of all magical people. It took Jules a lot to remember that Petunia also lost a sibling that night._

_"She has, hasn't she?" Jules placed a big sloppy kiss on the tot's cheek which evoked a shriek of delight. "And how are our boys?" Petunia's face suddenly lit up in a way that Jules had never seen it do before. The two of them walked into the living room and Jules got the chance to hug the three year old nephew of hers. To make things fair, she gave both Harry and Dudley enchanted toys from Diagon Alley. _

_Petunia watched from her seat while Jules talked to her from the floor while showing the children how to play with chocolate frogs. She didn't like wizards, witches or magical creatures. She didn't like them destroying the status quo. She hated them for stealing her Lily, but for a moment, watching Jules play with her little boy so gently despite everything that had gone on between them, Petunia could forget. She could forget all the things she hated because watching Jules play with the little green-eyed boy that was left at her doorstep a year and a half ago made her feel like Lily was still there too._

_The smoke alarm went off, rousing the adults from the temporary bliss. Remus was cursing in the kitchen waving his wand at growing flames. The moment of bliss was gone. The ruddy wizards were about to burn down her house!_

* * *

**_London, July 31st, 1993_**

Lucy grabbed an extra piece of Harry's birthday cake and slid into her room. She placed the plate down and sat on the carpet at the edge of her bed. A big, wet, black nose sniffed out the cake and a dog with thick black curly fur and storm grey eyes that matched Lucy's popped its head out from under the bed.

"You didn't like the dog food I gave you, so I thought I'd-" Lucy looked at the dog whose eyes hadn't left her since it noticed the plate. "It's Harry's birthday. Eat your cake."

The creature dove into the cake and ate it in record time. The dog's pink tongue cleaned off the blue plates that Lucy knew her mother had rescued from her grandparents' house. After the dog was finished, Lucy pet his soft fur and felt at peace. Large gatherings always made her nervous. She didn't really know what she was going to do in a month when it came to the Sorting Hat ceremony at Hogwarts. Sitting on her bedroom floor with the stray dog made her nerves slip away.

She'd found the dog on her way home early from the market just around the corner from the flat. It was pouring rain and the dog looked emaciated and lonely. He followed her back to the building where Lucy had decided he could stay without consulting anyone else. She knew, since the night when Kingsley Shacklebolt had searched the flat, her mother had worried about safety. What better way to keep safe than with a gigantic dog in the flat? Lucy was sure the dog would protect them no matter the cost.

After the dog had cleaned its plate, he lay down beside Lucy and leaned his big, fluffy head on her lap. Lucy scratched behind his ears and hoped that Dumbledore might make an exception to the cats, toads, owls and rats only rule at Hogwarts.

"Lucy," Jules' voice made the dog leap up to its feet. "Come out and be social, love." The dog's tail slowly wagged back and forth as Lucy got to her feet.

"You should hide again," Lucy whispered. She scratched under his chin, picked up the plates and slipped out of her room silently. Once the door was closed, the big dog stretched before hiding underneath the bed.

* * *

Lucy sat on the floor with her back leaned against the sofa in the living room. Ron, Hermione and Harry were all giggling around the kitchen table. Uncle Remus and her mum were talking in whispers that she couldn't hear. Lucy watched as Molly Weasley chastised Fred and George and felt slightly left out of the whole thing. Her mind drifted to the large dog currently in her bedroom. Her heart pounded at the idea of someone going and accidentally revealing her secret.

"Are you excited?" Ginny Weasley's voice shook Lucy from her daydream.

"Excited?" Lucy raised an eyebrow and pushed a black curl out of her forehead. Ginny smiled and sat down beside her on the floor.

"You know, to go to Hogwarts," Ginny said.

"Of course," Lucy laughed. "I can't wait. It's just... I think my mum might be lonely while I'm gone. Uncle Remus and Harry will both be gone, too. Not sure who else she talks to, really." Lucy watched as her mother laughed at something Remus had said. Her mother smiled sweetly at her old friend and placed a hand on his arm. It was the first time Lucy had seen her mother at ease since the night they'd been woken up by Kingsley Shacklebolt. Jules could get tense so very easily.

"Well, she'll be fine," Ginny smiled reassuringly. "My mum said she'd look after yours, and my mum takes care of everyone. Promise." Lucy nodded at her friend. The two got up and went into the bathroom, as girls often do, just to escape from the crowded living area.

* * *

"What am I going to do once you're gone, too?" Jules said softly into her mug of tea.

Remus sat across the kitchen table from her and set his mug down. He hadn't seen Julianne look so small, delicate or fragile since before Lucy was born. She looked terrified at the prospect of losing everything close to her. He had known to expect that once the news broke about Sirius' escape.

"Send me a patronus whenever you have a spare second," Remus smiled at her. "I'll send owls and updates about Harry and Luce. I promise I won't let anything happen to them. Make sure Lucy's eating her greens."

"I've kept her so close to me for 11 years, you'd think I'd have known that this day would come and it wouldn't be easy," Jules looked over at Remus and teared up a little.

"Julie, she's your daughter," Remus reached over and touched her left wrist. "She'll be bloody brilliant."

Jules stared at his weathered hand. She placed her right hand over his and just sat there for a moment. She was so glad Remus had come over so often since the escape. She was so glad that Remus had been there for every major moment he could safely attend. He had practically raised Lucy and Harry along side her except for the one week a month he had to hide away. Those kids loved him like a father. He had been there the day Lucy took her first steps. He had helped heal Harry when he fractured his wrist at age 8, and again at age 10. Now, all three of them, her boys and her girl, they'd all be off at Hogwarts. Jules blinked back tears at the idea of this tiny flat being empty. It had never been empty.

"Mum," Lucy interrupted the moment. "Who's in this picture? I see Peter, Uncle Remus, Aunt Lily and Uncle James... There's you, and then there's this man. Who is he?"

Jules snapped her head around and looked at her daughter. In Lucy's hands was a photo album that had long been hidden and forgotten. Lucy placed it on the table in front of both Remus and her mother. Jules and Remus exchanged glances. On the open page in front of them was a picture of much younger versions of themselves.

In the photo, everyone looked so happy. Jules had her hair half up, half down. It cascaded down her back, like it had when she was younger. Her eyes twinkled and her laughter echoed her twin's beside her. She wore a light turquoise dress that flowed loosely from below the waist to the floor. To Jules' left were the newlyweds. James had his arms wrapped around the waist of the girl he had chased relentlessly throughout their Hogwarts days. His hair was slicked back, but a few loose strands popped out, here and there. In the picture, he placed kisses on Lily's cheek and then turned to hug his twin. Lily's hair was perfectly styled in curls that framed her face. She waved at the camera with one hand and held her bouquet of roses in the other. Her dress was a beautiful muggle gown that her mother had worn on her wedding day. It had been altered to fit her like a glove. Beside her were Remus and Peter. They had cleaned up for the special day as well: tuxes and pomade. In the photo they held glasses of champagne and toasted their best friend's wedding. Jules had forgotten that there were any happy photos from that day. She had forgotten that she had kept any.

On the far right side of the photo was a tall young man with curly black hair and storm grey eyes. He was handsome and looked more angular than both James and Remus. There was something almost regal about his appearance that he had tried to mask with a goofy, crooked grin. His hair was chin length and looked as though he hadn't tried to do anything with it at all. Picture Jules fixed his bow tie and appeared to give the man a hard time. It was only met with him kissing her cheek. The world was still an adventure to the six of them. The war had barely touched them.

Lucy had never seen a picture of him before, but he appeared in all sorts of pictures all throughout this photo album, often with Uncle James or her mum. His face looked eerily familiar but Lucy couldn't pinpoint where she had seen him before.

"Mum?" Lucy questioned with her tone. Jules' face had paled and her mouth felt bone dry. Remus ran his fingers along the page. Lucy knew just by their expressions that whatever they answered with was going to be a rather long, but intriguing story.

"Where did you get that?" Jules' voice croaked out. She tried to swallow, but her tongue felt like sandpaper.

"It was just lying on the bathroom counter," Lucy explained. "So who's he?" She pointed to the man again. Remus shifted his point of focus to Jules. It wasn't often that photo albums were left lying around, especially when she hated discussing that aspect of her past so much.

"That's your father," Jules said. "That's Sirius Black."


	4. Death at a Wedding

**Chapter Four: Death at a Wedding**

* * *

**_Godric's Hollow, August 15th, 1978_**

_Julianne tore through the kitchen cupboards searching for the hidden stash of firewhiskey. She felt as though she was the only one completely panicked about the impending wedding. James managed to keep calm, and Lily looked in a state of bliss. Jules needed a stiff drink and she needed it yesterday. Lily's parents were to arrive the next day. Meanwhile, June and Harold still hadn't come back from the last auror mission. Jules found the bottle and held it in her palm for a while. Her parents had never missed an important event. They had always seemed to make their professional life bend to the whims of James and Jules. James was getting married tomorrow and there hadn't been a single word from either parent. Jules stared at the half-full bottle of firewhiskey and felt half-empty. _

_A loud crack in the living room sounded the arrival of another witch or wizard in the house. Jules dropped the bottle out of pure excitement and refused to acknowledge the broken glass or 300ml of liquid on the marble floors. She ran to the other room and prayed to a god she wasn't sure existed that her parents were home. Instead, Sirius was back from London carrying a pile of what appeared to be freshly altered dress robes. _

_"Oh," Jules sighed. "It's you." She hadn't meant for her voice to sound so disappointed. She hadn't meant to turn and leave the room unceremoniously. She certainly hadn't meant to slip in the firewhiskey or cut open her hand on the broken bottle._

_"Jules, is everything alright?" Sirius called out as he hung up the dress robes in the front wardrobe. He heard her cursing away. _

_"Everything is perfect, just absolutely perfect," She spat as she pulled a third piece of glass from her hand. As she reached for the fourth piece, she touched it and cried out in pain. It was wedged deep into her palm and appeared to be somewhere near a nerve ending._

_Hearing Jules call out in pain, Sirius walked into the kitchen and noticed bloodied glass, spilled firewhiskey and a wincing Jules, sitting on the floor, with a rather large piece of bottle sticking out of her bleeding palm and a smaller piece wedged in the side of her forearm. _

_"Absolutely perfect," He repeated. "You've got to be fucking joking, Julianne Potter." Sirius bent down and scooped her into his arms. He carried her into the living room and gently placed her on the sofa. _

_"Accio towels," he summoned. Sirius placed one towel over her lap and shirt, and he placed the other over his lap. He took her arm into his lap and inspected the pieces of glass in her hand._

_"I can take care of myself, Padfoot." Jules scowled at him._

_"Oh, shut up," he said. "You've gone and ruined the last of the firewhiskey, and now you've got glass where only skin should be. Accio tweezers." Sirius caught a pair of tweezers and pulled out the piece in her wrist. _

_"Ow!" She protested. She tried to wrench her arm from his grasp, but Sirius held it down firmer than he had before. _

_"Next time, don't drop yourself on the whiskey," Sirius rolled his eyes. He pulled the final bit of glass out of her palm and then tore a strip off of the towel. Jules watched as he accioed her mother's healing salve and poured it on the towel strip before wrapping the strip around her wounds. She winced at the sting of healing properties and then looked at Sirius' concerned grey eyes. _

_Every time she looked at those eyes, she remembered the feeling of pulling his face down to her level so she could press her lips angrily against his during that fateful Christmas with Hestia Jones sitting downstairs. Jules remembered how his hands slid to her waist and pulled her closer while pushing her towards the wall. Her back hit hard plaster, a few frames fell, and suddenly his lips were against her neck. Jules remembered the door opening as Sirius came back to her lips. Sirius' hands were knotted in her hair, hers were clutching at his shirt collar, and James stood gaping at them in the doorway. They knew he was watching. They knew he had seen. Somehow, the closeness of each other managed to overwhelm them. It wasn't until they heard James stammering in the hall trying to explain to the girlfriend that it had broken apart. Jules refused to talk about it._

_Staring at his eyes now, she realized that she had tried too hard to shut him out. He had gone back to Hestia, temporarily, then he moved on to Florence McDonald. The Hogwarts days had been a string of girls for him, and Jules focused more on being around James, Remus and Peter than sitting next to Sirius for over a year. She didn't talk to him for three months, but it had been over a year since that incident in her bedroom. They had tried to make up when things had gone south with Florence, but Jules had played things too cool. _

_Sirius kept her gaze for longer than he should have. They'd been putting distance between themselves for so long but all he wanted to do was run his fingers through her hair and hold her close. The girls he'd had, the things he'd done, it had all paled in comparison to that one kiss on Christmas day. He resented her for ruining it for him, but he resented her more for pushing him away despite the fact that they had to spend so much time around each other. He felt his hand reach out and reflexively push a piece of her hair behind her ear. Her eyes followed his hand. _

_"Thanks for patching me up," Jules said softly. His hand hovered around her face before he slowly lowered it back down to his wand and sent the dirty towels to the laundry room._

_"You're welcome," He cleared his throat and pocketed his wand again. The two of them stood up and stared at each other again. "You should be all healed for the wedding tomorrow." _

_"Healed, but probably a wreck," She used her good hand to run her hands through her hair. "I'm the worst when it comes to-" Jules was cut off by the sudden awareness of how close Sirius was to her. His hand cupped her cheek and tilted her head up to look him in the eye. "When it comes to..." She couldn't keep her head straight. Sirius leaned in, his eyes were closed, and Jules felt like she was struggling for air. _

_Suddenly, his lips were against hers and Jules forgot everything. She melted into him. He used one arm to lift her up to his height, and Jules wrapped her legs around his waist. Sirius gripped her hair with another hand and walked over to the wall. He pressed her in between the wall and him. She let her tongue threaten to explore the insides of his mouth. His right hand slid down to her waist and slid under the hem of her shirt. Jules shivered at the sensation of his skin against hers. Sirius lifted her back up properly and began to walk towards the stairs. He placed her down at the bottom of them and leaned to her height in order to continue kissing her. Jules pulled him up the stairs, and caught her breath in between kisses. Sirius pressed her against his bedroom door and kissed her neck while fumbling with the door handle. Jules dug her nails into the small of his back and sighed._

_"Oh, bloody hell," James' voice made both of them freeze. "You two are supposed to save this for some hidden closet at the wedding reception." _

_Jules pushed Sirius away from her and ducked out from behind him. She didn't say a word to either of the two people in the hallway and slammed her bedroom door behind her. Sirius let his forehead lean against the door and he held himself up with his arms on either side of the doorway. _

_"So what exactly are your intentions with my sister, mate?" James walked over and patted Sirius on the shoulder. _

_"What did it look like?" Sirius groaned as he straightened out his hair. James' hand grabbed Sirius' shoulder and spun him around to face him. Sirius had a few inches on James in height, but it didn't make James any less intimidating in that moment. James grabbed Sirius' collar in one hand._

_"Listen," He hissed. "You're my best mate, I love you like a brother, but Jules is off limits. You don't get to have a romp with her just to toss her aside like you do with girls. She's my sister, my twin sister. If you use her, hurt her, lay a hand on her without intending to treat her like she deserves, I swear on Merlin's grave, I will not hesitate to end your life," James let go of Sirius' collar and took a step back. "Do we understand each other?" _

_"I wouldn't- She's not- I could never-" Sirius stumbled over his words. He looked entirely resigned. "I think I..." Sirius ran a hand over his face. "Never mind, Prongs, I understand."_

_James nodded and pulled his friend into a one armed hug while he ruffled his hair. _

_"I'll hold you to that," James laughed. As James retreated to his bedroom, Sirius stood in the hall for another moment. He waited until he heard James' bedroom door close. He walked over to Jules' door and his fist hovered over the door, threatening to knock. He waited for a few moments and then turned away. He walked to his bedroom door, mad at himself that he couldn't bring himself to talk to her, and slammed the door behind him._

_Jules leaned her head against the door. She saw the shifting of light as he shuffled in front of her door, hoping that he'd knock. When he didn't, she took a deep breath and flopped down on her bed. _

* * *

**_Godric's Hollow, James and Lily's Wedding Day_**

_Jules helped James tie up his bow tie the magic-free way. Her hand was mostly healed, but the cuts were still visible. James looked so handsome and so grown up. His glasses had no fingerprints on the lenses, his dress robes weren't stained or muddied. He felt as though a thousand monarch butterflies had taken up living in his stomach. The air smelled sweeter, the sun shone brighter, and despite the newly started war, James had never been more hopeful for the future. Today, he was going to marry the girl of his dreams. James was going to marry Lily Evans. _

_"This ruddy bow tie," Jules cursed as she undid it again. "It just won't-" She took a deep breath and let it hang on either side of her twin's neck. _

_"Remember on our first ride on the Hogwarts Express? When you looked across and saw Lily with her red hair?" Jules said, suddenly very nostalgic for the innocence of the past. "You told me that I should get used to her, and I didn't know what you meant. Good Godric, that was nearly 8 years ago..."_

_"Do you get it now?" James smiled. He turned to face the full-length mirror and tried to tie his bow tie himself. _

_"Hard not to," Jules said. She reached and brushed some lint off of the backs of his shoulders. "I mean, if I don't like her at this point-"_

_"It's a bit late, innit?" James finished for her as they usually did with each other's sentences. "Oh, for fucks sake, I can't tie this bloody thing without my wand." He turned back to his twin and the two stared at each other._

_"You know, I'm glad that you found someone else to finish your sentences," Jules said matter-of-factly. "After 18 years, you're becoming a bit predictable." She went back to fiddling with the bow tie. She figured that this was her latch ditch effort before they both resigned to the fact that they'd become entirely dependent on magic. What a disappointment to Lily they'd be._

_"I've always been predictable, Julie," James laughed. "At least to you, that is." Jules shook her head and smiled. She could only imagine the future panicked letters from Lily and the patronuses that asked for advice regarding the young man standing in front of her._

_"Got it," Jules grinned. She let James turn around to inspect her handiwork. The bow tie was more than a little crooked, but he didn't want to flare up his sister's temper or run the risk of unravelling what had taken them both over twenty minutes to figure out._

_The door burst open and Sirius stood in the doorway. His tie was tied no problem, and his dress robes looked immaculate. He looked at Jules, who wearing only a silk robe that came down to just above her knees, and his breath caught in his throat. They had purposely avoided each other all morning, but now she was standing there. Her hand was slightly bruised from the firewhiskey incident, but the healing salve had scabbed over most of her cuts. Jules quietly excused herself from the room and headed to the guest bedroom. She tried to control her breathing and get her heart rate to slow down. The sight of Sirius in wedding dress robes had made her head spin with the thought of his arms around her. _

_Jules entered the guest bedroom that they had converted into a bridal dressing room. In the corner, she saw Lily holding a piece of crumpled parchment with red, swollen eyes._

_"Oh, Jules," Lily sniffled and wiped under her eyes with the back of her hand. "I uh- I was going to look for you, but the groom mustn't see me, so I just... I was going to..." Lily crumbled into incoherent sobs about her stupid, selfish older sister and how her dad got stuck on a business trip in New York. At least, Jules assumed that he was stuck in New York, because she didn't think that getting stuck in the North of York was as good of an excuse to miss your daughter's wedding. _

_Julianne had only ever had to deal with male emotions, and refused to acknowledge her emotions regarding romantic situations. She was likely the worst person to step in as the maid of honour and she knew that Lily only asked because Jules was James' sister. They liked each other well enough, but Jules had grown up in a very different world. For most of the time they had known each other, Jules saw her as a competitor for her twin's attention which had made things a little tense at first. The only thing she knew how to do was open her arms and wrap them around the tiny redhead. She stroked her soft hair and told her it would be okay if they could just "Slip into the gowns," Jules said. "Walk down the isle, it'll be grand. I promise." _

_The dressing room door opened and Remus stood there looking a lot more disheveled than Sirius had moments before._

_"Jules, I can't get this bleeding tie to do up properly and James said that you cou-" He stopped mid-sentence when he saw Lily sobbing in a rather panicked Julianne's arms. "Is everything alright?" Remus raised one of his eyebrows and stood frozen in the doorway._

_"Does it bloody well look al-" Jules started to snap before she paused and looked at the crying bride in her arms. "It's fine. It's absolutely perfect," Jules made her tone of voice perk up an octave and she put on her finest smile. "Everything will be just perfect, because we're going to get into our dresses and we're going to have stiff upper-lips because we should make everyone regret missing your special day, alright, Lily?"_

_Jules turned to Remus and mouthed 'Help me.' Remus joined in and said that of course it would all be perfect, and not to cry because today was supposed to be the happiest day of her life. Jules passed Lily to Remus and then found her dress. She ran to the guest bathroom, slipped it on as quickly as possible, pinned half of her hair out of her face, and then ran back to the guest bedroom. When she returned, Lily had stopped crying and was reapplying her make up. Taking in a deep breath, Jules rushed downstairs and stole a flute of champagne from a tray. She hadn't yet put on her high heels, so she held her long skirt in one hand, the champagne in the other and managed not to spill a drop on anything._

_"Here, Lily," Jules breathed heavily. "Drink this. It'll take the edge off." Plastering another award winning smile, Jules made a note to take a calming potion on the day of her wedding. She watched as her future sister-in-law downed the flute of champagne and then she pulled Remus to the side._

_"Go refill this, and then go tell the lads that everything is just perfect, okay?" Jules whispered. Remus took the empty flute and stared at Jules._

_"You look beautiful," He smiled. Jules shook her head and kissed Remus on the cheek. _

_"Thank you," She said. "Now please go get another glass of champagne, because I can't live through another meltdown." Remus turned and left the girls alone. _

_Lily had finished reapplying her make up and was inspecting her dress that had been hanging up in the wardrobe. Jules helped her get into it and adjusted the corset in the back. Lily was a vision, a basket case as well, but beautiful to look at all the same. Her emerald green eyes looked like jeweled inlay on porcelain. Her hair framed her face and was pulled back in an intricate bun. She wore pearl drop earrings, and a matching pearl necklace. Jules felt like wallpaper behind a masterpiece as she stood next to Lily. _

_The door swung open once more. A worried Sirius walked which made both girls turn and look over their shoulders. He inspected the room and had his hand on the handle of his wand under his robes. _

_"Remus said everything was 'just perfect'," Sirius raised an eyebrow at Julianne. His eyes shifted to her injured hand and Jules realized that he looked as though he'd run to find her as soon as he heard those words. He looked around the room, and Lily exchanged glances between both Jules and Sirius. _

_"Everything is just perfect," Lily said. She looked at Jules, "Unless just perfect is code for-" _

_"No, it's fine," Jules cut off Lily. She crossed the room and grabbed Sirius' arm pulling him out of the dressing room and closing the door behind her. _

_"I thought you'd gotten hurt, or spilled red wine on Lily's dress, or maybe death eaters had broken in-" Sirius rushed through his words trying to explain himself. "Why are you looking at me like that? I was genuinely worried about y- I was worried." _

_"Because Moony told you I said things were just perfect?" Jules said with a rather amused smile on her face. _

_"Everything was just perfect last night while you were pulling glass out of your hand in a puddle of firewhiskey. It was just perfect when half the kitchen was in flames when we were 14, or how about when things were 'just absolutely bloody-well perfect' and you had shattered the expensive gift that your dad had bought your mother for her birthday," Sirius said flatly. He turned to walk away, but Jules grabbed his wrist with her good hand. He turned to face her again and sighed. "I had every right to panic. I just thought you might be hurt. I thought something bad was happening and you were trying to tell me to look for you in code."_

_Jules let go of his wrist, grabbed his lapels and pulled him down to her height. Before he had the chance to say anything else, Jules was kissing him. Sirius let one of his hands slip behind her neck and he found himself feeling lost in the taste of her mouth. Finally pulling away, she leaned her forehead against his._

_"Jules, I think I'm in love with-" Sirius whispered while he struggled to catch his breath. _

_"Shh," Jules put her finger over his lips. "We have to get through a wedding." _

* * *

_Jules and James ran through the hospital still in their outfits from the wedding ceremony. Lily in her wedding gown followed closely behind them. Two more loud cracks sounded Remus and Sirius arriving and following them. A third crack was Peter, who looked entirely disoriented as he started to run the opposite way, and then turned to follow the rest of the gang. The nurses at St. Mungo's watched as the six of them barreled through nurses, visitors and patients trying to find the room. _

_Jules could barely breathe as she held her long skirt above her feet. One high heel suddenly broke off, and she kicked off her shoes to run barefoot through the halls. James and Julianne stopped running and the pair of them grabbed each other's hand as they came to the hospital room. They should have known something was wrong when their parents didn't send an owl about being delayed. They should have known that June and Harold would have stopped battling death eaters to be there for James' wedding. _

_The hospital room door opened, and a nurse stood in front of them. Lily watched, flanked by Sirius and Remus, as James crumbled into Jules' arms. Lily had never seen James cry like that before. She never expected that her first time witnessing him sob would be on their wedding day. Sirius ran forward and Lily watched as tears began to fall down each of his cheeks. Jules appeared frozen. Her face was contorted in an expression of shock. She turned and asked the nurse something. The nurse nodded and let the three enter the room. Lily went to follow them, but Remus grabbed her arm._

_"I know you want to help," he said. "I know that you want to be there for James, but just give them a minute." Lily looked down at her wedding dress and back up at Remus. _

_Inside the hospital room, Harold and June were in beds beside one another. Harold was in a coma, and looked as though he had been beaten black and blue. His strong frame appeared fragile and his skin looked like white paper that had horrendous blue and purple swelling paint splattered across it. His breathing sounded ragged and shallow. June was awake, but was in equally bad condition. Her eyes were glazed over and her right arm had 'mudblood lover' carved into it repeatedly._

_Chairs for the twins and Sirius to sit on appeared by the bedsides. James let his head collapse on the bed beside his mother's arm. Her hand reached up and placed itself on his head, but the action appeared to take all the energy she had left. Jules sat there in complete shell-shock. Her skirt grazed the floor and her feet ached from the high heels. She felt Sirius' warm hand reach for hers and squeeze it. She heard the ragged breathing of her parents. She heard James trying to stifle his tears. She saw Sirius wipe the tears from his face, but she couldn't feel anything. She felt cold and isolated even though she was surrounded by the people she loved. _

_"Julie," Her mother's voice came out like a croak. It sounded like sandpaper against wood. "Don't be afraid," Her mother started coughing and spluttering. Jules felt hot tears sting her eyes. "Don't be afraid to embrace- embrace life, my darlings." Sirius' fingers laced themselves with hers and she used her other hand to reach out and touch her mother. As the tears began to fall unceremoniously down her cheeks, Jules stood up and kissed her mother's bruised and bloodied face. _

_"I love you, mum," She whispered against her forehead. Her mother's forehead felt hot against her lips, and she knew that was a sign of an infection she'd be unable to defeat in her mother's condition. Jules let go of Sirius' hand and moved her chair beside her dad's bed. _

_She knew that he was long gone and it was just the shell of the man that had read her Tales of Beedle and the Bard. Still, Jules sat down beside him and held his hand. She blocked out of the rest of the world and told him stories from when she and James were young in the hopes that it might give him some peace._

_The door opened again, and Lily came into the room. She looked at her new husband's parents and crossed the room to his side. She placed her arms around him and promised June she'd take care of her son. Lily watched as Sirius moved to the other side of the bed, and June began to reach her mutilated arm to him. _

_"Ta-take my rings," June said to Sirius. Sirius stared at her hand. It was maroon from being tortured, but her wedding and engagement rings still were in tact. "I've seen h-how you look at-" She fell into a coughing spell. "How you look at her... Take these and-" June wheezed in a breath. She fell into a coughing spit and thrust her hand into his with the last bit of her strength. _

_Sirius hesitated as he slid off the two bands from her finger. He slipped them into his dress robe pocket, and kissed the back of her hand. She was burning up. She was the only woman to accept him into her family without any questions asked. His heart ached at the thought of losing such a beautiful soul. Tears fell down his cheeks. Sirius searched the room for Jules, who was still whispering things to her dad. She turned her head over her shoulder, and Sirius nodded at her. She got up, realizing that her mother's condition wasn't stabilizing. _

_"I-I've got all of my boys," June smiled as her eyes drifted shut. "All of my boys, and my two girls... Oh-" She wheezed again, sounding weaker and weaker, "Oh, James, I'm so sorry for missing the wedding..." _

_Jules stood at the end of the bed. Lily held James in her arms as he held his mother's right hand. Sirius kept his hands wrapped around June's left hand. In the doorway, Albus Dumbledore, Remus and Peter watched. The silence that fell as soon as June's lungs had betrayed her and failed to do their job hit like a stone against a window. James let his head hit the bed beside his mother's brutally beaten body. Sirius held onto her hand until it went cold. Lily kissed James' shoulder and whispered about how she was at peace. Julianne felt suddenly very distant from her body. Her extremities tingled and she felt herself grow cold. Tears fell from her cheeks and she looked over at her father's body. He had held onto what little life he had left, but his wife was gone and he had no clue. _

_Jules barely noticed herself fall to her knees. Her chest heaved. Her vision went blurred as more tears filled her eyes behind her glasses. A pair of arms wrapped around her small frame and lifted her from the floor. Soft linen felt cool beneath her cheek as her tears wet it. The scent of leather and aftershave filled her nostrils. Her hands clasped around the robes of whomever it was holding her. She started to shiver in the cool, hospital, recycled air. The arms let go of her. Another pair of arms draped a jacket over her shoulders. Without saying anything, Jules pried herself from the arms around her and walked towards her father's comatose body at the other side of the room. She crawled onto the bed with him and lay her head on his chest like she had when she was younger. _

_The nurses removed June from the room. They maneuvered around the wedding party and bowed their heads politely at Albus. One nurse opened her mouth to protest the girl that was lying in bed with the other patient, but Dumbledore simply shook his head. Julianne needed to have her moment._

* * *

**SMASH!**

_Sirius leapt out of bed and grabbed his wand. He ran out of his room, wearing nothing but boxers and a t-shirt and was met by Lily, wearing one of James' t-shirts and James, wearing plaid pajama bottoms and his old quidditch t-shirt. They all shared tired looks with their swollen eyes and raced down the stairs. James flinched as his eyes adjusted to the light in the living room. Jules was sitting on the floor with tears running down her cheeks as she held a broken, bone china teacup in her hands._

_Sirius stepped forward to go and comfort her, but James put his arm out to stop him. This was a job that only James could do. He walked towards his sister and sat down beside her. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and leaned his head on top of hers. _

_"It was sitting on the bookshelf from the last tea she had," Jules cried into her brother's chest. "But I broke it... I broke her cup..." James held his twin in his arms and rocked her gently back and forth. He stroked her hair and he held her tightly. _

_Lily placed her hand on Sirius' arm as a signal that they should leave the twins be for a moment. Sirius followed Lily into the kitchen. Lily pulled her red hair all over one shoulder and she began to search for other mugs to make tea in. She knew that it might not be much, but the least she could do was make something calming to help the twins get some sleep. Sirius leaned against the kitchen counter and rubbed his eyes with his hands._

_"I'm sorry about your wedding, Lil," Sirius said. He pushed his black, curly hair out of his eyes. _

_"Oh, stop it," Lily said crossly. "The marriage is important, not the wedding. I'm sorry about June and Harold." She found the teapot and put the kettle on to boil on the stove. She arranged the mugs in a row._

_"It just feels like they're still away, like they'll just pop in any minute," Sirius said. His tone of voice was distant as though he was thinking of a time long ago. Lily didn't know what to say. She stayed silent and poured the hot water into the teapot once it had boiled. Lily payed close attention and made all four cups of tea. She handed one to Sirius, and then she took two others into the living room. _

_Lily re-entered the living room and crossed to James and Jules. She handed Jules a cup of tea, and pet her sister-in-law's hair. _

_"Tea makes almost everything hurt a little less," Lily said gently. James looked at Lily and was so enchanted by the way she loved Jules so whole-heartedly despite the differences that they'd had in the early days._

_As Lily handed him his mug of tea, he kissed her cheek and whispered, "I love you." Lily smiled and tilted her head to the side in response; a silent 'I know.' She knew that she had to share James. When they had first started dating, it took a while to adjust to the fact that James would suddenly break off conversation with her to make sure his twin was alright. He always came back, and the apologies always made up for it: roses, chocolate, picnics in front of the lake at Hogwarts. Lily also knew that loving James meant loving all of James which included Jules. _

_When Lily retreated into the kitchen, Jules sipped her tea with her head still leaned on James' shoulder. _

_"Lily amazes me," Jules said with her voice hoarse from crying, "I mean, seven years, seven bloody years she turned you down... Now look at her. Mrs. James Potter. Bringing me a cup of tea while I snivel on the floor. Never thought I'd see the day." _

_"I hate to say I told you so, Julie, darling twin-of-mine," James kissed the top of his twin's head. "But I bloody well told you she'd come around." Jules laughed and she sat up straight. She kissed him on the cheek and pulled her knees up to her chest while she took another sip of tea. James smiled gently and watched her. _

_Sirius and Lily entered the room and joined them on the floor. James wrapped his arm around Lily's shoulder and thanked her for the tea. She patted James leg and said, "Well, love, you have a lifetime to bring me tea in bed. But you're off-duty for now. It's my turn to take care of you for better or for worse, in this case." _

_The four of them sat around the living room. They exchanged their favourite stories of June and Harold from years before when James had yet to woo the lovely Miss Evans and Sirius' voice had yet to break. They talked for hours. Lily pantomimed her first impression on June and Harold with Jules' help. They laughed. They cried. They put in the first stitches into the new gap that had been created in their lives. Finally, Lily began to yawn. Her eyes were half-closed. James lifted her up and said his goodnights to Jules and Sirius for the second time. _

_Once James had made it all the way up the stairs with the sleepy Lily, Sirius and Jules sat in silence for a moment with their backs against the sofa._

_"You know," Jules said softly. "Mum and dad loved you, Padfoot. They were so proud of you and everything you did..." She put her empty mug on the coffee table and rubbed her hands over her face. _

_"I know," Sirius smiled sadly. "They were so generous with their love of other people. I just hope one day I'm a bit like them." Jules looked over at his angular profile. She let her hand slide over his. _

_"You are," She said. "You always have been. Even when you're being a complete arse," Jules teased and nudged him with her shoulder. Sirius chuckled and laced his fingers through hers. They stared at their intwined hands. There was a moment of silence between them. The air was still. The artificial light in the room made their eyes ache with exhaustion. Their hands felt warm and perfectly encased by the other. Jules leaned her head on Sirius' shoulder and took a deep breath. Her eyes felt heavy as soon as she got comfortable. Her eyelids felt weighted down to the floor and she didn't have the fight left in her to struggle against sleep. She noticed as Sirius adjusted himself to have his arm wrapped around her so her head was against his chest._

_"This is nice," Jules yawned. She heard Sirius' heart beating beneath her ear. She hummed softly before the exhaustion finally overwhelmed her and her system gave in to recuperation through sleep. _

_Sirius listened as her breathing regulated. He adjusted himself and heaved her dead weight into his arms. He swore that he'd never tell her how heavy she was when asleep, and struggled to carry her upstairs. Once he had tucked her into bed, he pushed some hair out of her face. He kissed her forehead and smiled. _

_"You didn't let me say it earlier," he whispered. "But you're asleep now so you can't interrupt me... I have to tell you once, Jules. I'm quite terribly in love with you." After he had confessed it to an apparently sleeping Julianne, Sirius turned to leave. He felt his arm get caught by a hand._

_"Don't go," Jules' tired voice said. He turned back to face her and her hand dropped back to the bed. "Stay..." _

_Sirius contemplated walking what seemed like miles in this instant back to his bedroom, but instead he pulled back her duvet and slid into her sheets. He lay on his side and faced her. Her eyes were half open and she slipped her arm around his waist to pull him closer. Jules sighed as soon as her head was pressed against his chest. _

_"You heard me, didn't you?" He whispered. Jules nodded. There was a long silence. Sirius thought she had fallen asleep again, so he let his eyes drift shut. _

_"I love you, too, you big git," Jules whispered once she had checked that his eyes were closed. She kissed his shoulder in the darkness and then turned away from him. The last thing she felt was Sirius pull her closer and bury his face into her hair. _

* * *

**_London, August 16th 1993_**

Lucy screamed as she watched her mother wrestle with the black dog in the living room. She knew that her mother would not be pleased regarding her secret pet, but she hadn't expected her to go insane. Lucy shrieked even louder when the black dog she had been feeding under her bed transformed into the fugitive with whom she shared 50% of her DNA.


	5. We Used to Be Friends

**Chapter Five: We Used to Be Friends**

**_London, August 16th 1993_**

Remus heard Lucy screaming as he approached the flat. He flew through the door and ran inside as quickly as he possibly could. When he saw Julianne with her hair a mess, holding her wand against the throat of the man responsible for her brother's murder, he did what he had promised he would. He picked up the eleven year old that was sobbing in front of him and apparated to the Burrow.

"NO! You can't leave her with him," Lucy wailed. She pounded her fists against Remus' chest. "It's all my fault!"

Molly Weasley ran from the second floor of the house when she heard the crack followed by the screams of a very upset child. As she entered her kitchen and saw Remus holding Lucy Potter, Molly called upstairs for Harry to come down. She rushed over, her heart pounding as she realized what must be going on.

"What happened?" Her curly red hair was bouncing around her scalp as Remus passed her the crying child. Harry appeared at the doorway.

"Molly, get Dumbledore," Remus said. He kissed Lucy on the top of the head, "I'm so sorry, love." He turned his attention back to Molly, "Tell Dumbledore that Sirius Black is at Jules' flat! If he's not quick, there'll be another two murderers on the loose." With another crack, Remus was gone. Lucy let out a wail that could have competed with any banshee.

Jules swung her fist back and as it plummeted forward towards Sirius' face, his hand caught it. Letting out a guttural scream, Julianne fought against him as he rolled her onto her back. She spit in his face and reached her hands to claw at Sirius' eyes. He reached for her hands to pin her down at the wrists.

"Julianne, please, let me expl-" Sirius said before being cut off by Jules lifting up her legs and kneeing him off of her.

"James and Lily died because of you," Jules growled as she held her wand against his throat and had her thigh crushing his chest. "You killed Peter, you-" Sirius struggled against her. He had never seen such ferocity in her. He had never seen her hazel eyes flash with the volatility of someone who had been tortured, hurt and left alone. He had never seen her live twelve years without the company of the man who had been at her side since conception.

"Jules, it wasn't-" Sirius cut her off. With a force he had never expected from such a slight frame and a scream that sounded like the splitting of a heart, Jules slammed his upper torso onto the hardwood floor. The back of his head hit off the ground and the last thing he saw was a single tear slide down Julianne's pain and grief-stricken face.

When Remus returned to Jules apartment, he found Sirius bound to a kitchen chair and immobilized against the wall. Jules was standing a distance away from him, her wand was out and pointed at Sirius, but her hand was shaking. As Remus entered the kitchen, a sad smile spread across Sirius' face.

"Hullo Moony," Sirius said. "I owe you an apology, mate." Remus held out his arm to stop Julianne from lunging at the prisoner. Remus clenched his jaw and inhaled sharply.

"You sick fuck," Jules spat at Sirius from over Remus' arm. "How dare you go after my daughter, how _dare_ you! Haven't you stolen enough from us? We _trusted_ you! They trusted you! And you owe _him_ an apology? You ratted out James to the Dark Lord himself. I hope when the dementors kiss you that it fucks you hard." Her fist was clenched so tightly around her wand, Remus was scared that it might start to splinter. A fat tear rolled down her cheek.

"Julie, love," Sirius pleaded. "Think about what you said... You know I'm no rat."

"No, you're just a stray dog who blows up rats in the middle of London and preys on little girls," Remus growled. He reached for his wand. "You don't deserve to be her father."

"Julianne," The desperation in Sirius' voice made Jules pause for a moment. "Please, Jules, remember- remember after my last meeting with the Order? When we walked back to Grimmauld Place and you said that I was the obvious choice for secret keeper because James would never put you in danger? Do you remember what I said?"

Jules felt ice crawl up her spine. Her eyes flashed recognition of a conversation long gone.

"You said that you were too obvious of a choice," She said softly. Remus stiffened in front of her. "You said-"

"The only person that no one would look for was Peter," Sirius repeated as he watched Jules start to tremble. Her hand slackened the death grip around her wand and it fell to the kitchen floor. Her head was swimming with words and memories and the deep, stabbing absence of James and Lily. Resentment towards this man suddenly seemed so very misplaced.

"But you killed Peter," Remus declared. It shook Jules from her trance. "Everyone saw the explosion!" Jules opened her mouth to say something.

"Death Eaters," She said so quietly it was nearly a whisper. "The report said that 60% of the witnesses were Death Eaters. The other 40 was split between muggles and witches who were too far away to see. Oh Merlin... Remus, he's not guilty..."

"Jules, he's lying... He's planting thoughts so that you jump to these conclusions," Remus grabbed her shoulders.

"Julie, my love," Sirius cut in. "I promise you, I didn't kill Peter. He was the secret keeper. It wasn't me... I couldn't ever do anything like that. I loved them. I love you. I thought they would be safe. I was wrong."

"Julianne," Remus said. His tone was insistent and desperate. He couldn't bare to watch her go through another bout of dissociation just because Sirius was such a brilliant liar. He had fooled them all for years. "Please, darling, you know he must be lying. He always lied." A loud crack sounded in the living room. Albus Dumbledore entered the kitchen. The powerful wizard filled the extra space.

"H-he can't lie. I gave him veritaserum," Jules sobbed. "I didn't want him to be able to manipulate me. But he's innocent. Whatever he said," Jules covered her hand over her mouth and shook uncontrollably. Remus let go of her shoulders and saw the empty glass bottle on the counter. Dumbledore took a deep breath.

"We must move quickly," Albus said without hesitation. "The dementors will come soon and they do not wait around for explanations regarding truth serum, Ms. Potter." He turned and looked at Sirius. "Mr. Black, I understand you are still the proprietor of your parents' house on Grimmauld Place... I suggest you set up camp there until we can get you a stronger alibi than that of your ex-fiancé."

Jules appeared just outside of the Burrow and knocked on the door. It swung open and revealed a relieved Molly who opened her arms and held Jules tightly in her embrace for a long moment.

"Oh, thank Godric you're safe," Molly said. Jules hugged her back, but she felt stiff. Her movements were forced. She had to keep repeating to herself an internal monologue to remind her to breathe and smile even though it hurt.

"Where are Lucy and Harry?" Jules asked as she was finally released from Molly's arms.

"They're just inside. Lucy's still a bit upset about her dog, but she's been playing with Scabbers," Molly smiled. "That rat has lived far longer than it should have, but it's brought years of joy to the family."

Jules entered the Burrow and crossed into the living room. Harry and Lucy both jumped up from their seats. A simultaneous chorus of "Mum!" and "Aunt Julie!" greeted her. The pair of them flung their arms around her, and Julianne held them closer than she ever had.

"Mum, I'm so sorry I lied to you about Snuffles," Lucy tilted her head to the side. "Well, about my dad, I guess..." Lucy scrunched up her face and finished with, "Today was bizarre, can we never lie to each other again? It just makes things confusing." Jules laughed and kissed her daughter on the top of the head.

"That sounds like a plan to me, darling," Jules squeezed her daughter tightly. She turned to her teenage nephew. He had his hair sticking up at all ends and was grinning at her. He was expecting some tale of a bloody conquest. She could see his emerald green eyes searching for war wounds. His hair was mussed so that just the bottom of his scar could be seen. Jules hugged Harry tightly. He hated when she did it in front of Ron and Hermione, but she couldn't help it. He was as brave and as stubborn as his father. He had had his share of battles already, and he was only just thirteen. After she had planted big, sloppy embarrassing kisses on the two of them, Jules sat down on the sofa and attempted to mentally prepare herself for the question period.

* * *

**_Earlier that day, 12 Grimmauld Place_**

_As number 11 and 13 split to reveal what Julianne and Sirius had once tried to re-imagine as their future home, she had to swallow a large lump that had found itself in her throat. Dumbledore stood in front of her. Remus' right hand held onto her own, while his left held onto a leash that was attached to one scruffy, black dog. The four made their way into the house through the narrow hallway and into the main foyer. Once in the larger room, Sirius transformed back into himself. He stretched out his neck and pulled his hair out of his face to reveal a tattoo on the side of his neck. His sleeves slipped down and revealed a few more on his forearm. For the most part, the tattoos all looked like numbers and prisoner identification. _

_Jules' eyes subconsciously searched for a dark mark. It took her a while to adjust to the idea that this man she had hated with every fibre of her being was innocent. She wasn't prepared for this. She thought she had prepared for anything once she found out he was escaped, but the idea of his innocence had never crossed her mind. She pushed past her old headmaster, her dearest friend and the man she couldn't bare to look at any longer. Walking in to the narrow kitchen, Jules felt like she was being suffocated with a pillow and the threats of old realities that had come knocking on her door. _

_On the counters, dust had gathered in their absence, and she heard the mutterings of Kreacher in the other room. Jules turned around and walked into the dining room and looked around at the dark, overwhelming amount of wood. Kreacher had kept things relatively polished, but he had left all the paint chips from her days of contemplating redecorating where she had left them. Jules closed her eyes; she imagined a brighter wall colour and the shrieks of delight from younger versions of Harry and Lucy as they ran around terrorizing the house elf that hated everyone but the terrible Mrs. Black. She imagined having her morning tea at the table while reading the Daily Prophet, and Sirius walking in with Lucy on his shoulders and Harry in his arms. She opened her eyes and saw a very different version of Sirius at the other end of the room. _

_Sirius had aged more than she had in 12 years. He had traces of the years of hard labour in silver strands of hair mixed in with his black curls. His hands were dirty, and his nails were longer than he'd ever let them get when he was young. His cheeks were sallow and sunken in due to malnourishment. The only thing that hadn't changed was the light in his eyes as he took in the sight of her. Jules picked up some of the paint chips from the table. They had argued about the colour they were going to paint the kitchen just before Jules had left for her appointment at St. Mungo's. Jules smiled as she remembered the nurse congratulating her on her pregnancy. The smile faltered again as she had to stop the memories. Going to James and Lily's house, the unlocked door, the bodies..._

_"I maintain that ecru is not a real colour," Sirius' voice made Jules jump in her skin. She dropped the paint chips and searched the room for Remus. Sirius crossed the room to her. She was frozen in place. Tears welled in her eyes, so Jules clenched them shut to block out her surroundings. Every fibre of her soul wanted to deny this moment. His calloused fingers grazed across her cheek and pushed hair behind her ear. Jules tried her hardest not to flinch, but twelve years had taken its toll on all of the victims of that fateful Halloween night. Sirius' hand retracted and he backed away. When she opened her eyes, Jules saw the dejection and heartache in his eyes. _

_"Looking rather ragged, Sirius," Remus said from the doorway. His presence made Sirius turn, and Jules' eyes snap open. His voice had a sarcastic lilt to it. He was tense, but he needed to thaw the ice that had filled the room."Finally the flesh reflects the madness within."_

_"You'd know all about that, wouldn't you, Remus?" Sirius smiled half-heartedly at his old friend. Jules quietly looked between the two and drifted towards Remus without a word. _

_"Julie, are you alright?" Remus asked as she approached. Her skin had paled and she had a vacant look in her eyes. Her mouth was in a firm line, and he recognized the risk that she could crumble mentally at any moment. He opened up his arms and wrapped them around her. Sirius' shoulders stiffened as he watched the woman he loved find solace in the arms of his best friend. _

_"I need to go," Jules whispered into Remus' chest. "I can't do this." Her hazel eyes were tear filled. Remus held onto her small frame as he had countless times in the past twelve years. He ran his hand over her long black hair and comforted her anxiety. He could hear her heart beating out of her chest. _

_"Julianne-" Sirius said with a strained voice. He needed to hold her. He needed to be near her. Every inch of him had missed her, had longed for her to know his truth. _

_Remus opened his mouth to try and spare his friend from the impending meltdown if he stepped any closer. Before he could say a word, Julianne's muscles tensed and she turned to face him. _

_"I can't, Sirius," Her voice cut through the air. "I cannot do this. I can't look at you. All I see is my dead brother because you _lied_ to me. For twelve years, I believed you were responsible because you hid your truth in a fucking riddle!" Sirius and Remus watched as she began to tremble. "Did you know while you were in Azkaban I was in the mental ward? I was a prisoner of my own mind! I had all of my hair shaved off. I pulled it out in chunks, because I couldn't bare to live in a world where my other half was dead, and the only man I loved was responsible for it!" Her voice began to raise as much as it started to shake,"If you had only told me, if any of you had trusted me, James, Lily... I could have saved you! I could have had you, at least you... Lucy could have known you- She could h-have-" Jules realized that her hands had traveled into her scalp, and her fingers clenched large chunks of hair. She quickly lowered them to her sides. She held her clenched fists there. Her hazel eyes stared directly at the floor, refusing to look Sirius in the eyes._

_"I had to stare at your eyes every day for eleven years in the most beautiful baby girl," Julianne blinked back tears. "I had to stare at them, believing that if I wasn't careful, if Remus wasn't careful, that she might become as malicious as I thought you were." _

_Remus reached his arm out to pull her back to him, but she shook him off._

_"Everyone walks on eggshells around me," Jules said. Her voice had become shrill. "They all dance around the topic because secretly, no one believes I've ever recovered from that night..." She wiped two tears as they fell out of each eye. "And I haven't, Sirius. I have never recovered." _

_"Forgive me," Sirius couldn't stop himself as he said it. He reached his hands out and grabbed either side of her face. "I beg of you, forgive me, Jules." His grey eyes pleaded with hers. _

_"Wait," Jules whispered. "I need time, Sirius. Please..." Sirius let go of her face to wrap his arms around her, but in that instant she disappeared with a loud pop. Frustrated, Sirius turned and put his fist through the wall._

_He shouted, to no one in particular, "I did my waiting! Twelve years of it! In Azkaban!"_

* * *

**_That Evening at the Burrow_**

Jules sat on the sofa with an arm around a sleeping Lucy. Her head of black curls lay on Jules' chest. Harry hadn't spoken to her since she had revealed to him all she was allowed to about Sirius. He had stormed upstairs, followed by a concerned Ron and Hermione. Lucy was still young at heart. She still had the undoubting trust of youth not yet altered by the discontent of early teenage years. Lucy had forgiven her mother almost immediately, because she hated to see Julianne cry.

Remus apparated into the dining room. She knew it had been hard for him. He wasn't accepted in the wizarding world by very many people, but still he had moved around with her and the baby. Remus had always found somewhere to hide himself away once a month. Julianne heard the hushed conversations between Arthur, Molly and the man who had vowed to stay with her.

"Have you found any more evidence to support his alibi?" Arthur asked. There was a silence, followed by a subdued sigh from Molly.

"She's told the children he's innocent, you know," Molly whispered. "I'd hate for this to go badly... Poor Lucy was immediately on about seeing him."

"She didn't promise anything, did she?" Remus asked. More silence. Jules gently removed Lucy's head from off of her chest. She stood up from the couch and walked to the kitchen.

"She only said that no matter what Dumbledore would keep them safe at Hogwarts," Molly's voice carried to the living room. Silence fell among them. After last year and the Chamber of Secrets incident, they were all aware how very inaccurate that statement was.

"Don't worry, Moony," Jules said from beside the staircase. "I haven't made any promises I can't keep." All three adults turned to face the delicate woman with the paper thin frame. She looked like she might blow over in the wind, like the desperation of loneliness had driven her to the point of being willing to believe anything. Molly was the first to move towards her. She outstretched her arms in the way that every mother does to a terrified child. Jules let Molly wrap her arms around her shoulders. Her eyes found Remus' and while Molly pat her back as though she were a fussy baby, she smiled sadly at her old friend.

Remus watched as Jules let the middle aged redhead hold her. She lifted her arms and held Molly close. Remus paid close attention to the small smile on her lips. Her eyes searched his for some kind of answer that they both needed. The best that he could do for his favourite broken friend was to smile as reassuringly as he could. He would be leaving her in two weeks and taking the two children that required her to hold herself together at the seams.


	6. Ashes and Wine

**A/N: Wow! Three new followers! Thank you so much for your interest in this story. Feel free to leave a review! :) Cheers.**

* * *

**_September 12th, 1993_**

_Dear Mum, _

_Things at Hogwarts are great! I love it here. You were right about the moving staircases. They're really scary if they decide to move when you're on them. Luckily there's no Fluffy this year, though. Or at least, I haven't found him yet. Hermione said she'd help me with Charms. Ginny and I are just itching to get on the Quidditch pitch though. Can you please tell Uncle Moony I'm allowed? He told me that first years aren't allowed to play, but Harry was a seeker in his first year!_

_And Mum, don't worry if you get a letter from Uncle Moony about the dementors. Harry only fainted once! And don't listen to Uncle Moony about Buckbeak! He's the nicest hippogriff I've ever met, and Hagrid said I can ride him whenever I like! _

_How's Snuffles? I hope you're being nice to him even though I'm not around. _

_Love you,_

_Lucy_

_P.S. Moaning Myrtle isn't as bad as everyone says she is! She's just lonely... I'm sure you can understand. Oh! And Uncle Moony is looking a bit pale again so he says I'm not allowed to visit his office this week. I think he's getting sick again._

* * *

**_October 20th, 1993_**

_Aunt Jules,_

_Uncle Moony told me that they're monitoring me for my own protection... Because of the man you two insist is innocent! He also says I'm not allowed to say anything to Ron and Hermione. Are you both serious about this? I mean, they're my best mates. Would you have kept anything from him when you were in third year?_

_I just want to be a normal student here. That's all I've ever wanted, but each year it's like I'm under more and more supervision. And how can you stand Snape when you said yourself he was awful when you were here? He keeps getting worse._

_Lucy's fine. She wants to play quidditch, but our Captain isn't so sure about her and Uncle Moony has basically forbidden it since my train ride with the dementors._

_I hope you're not too lonely. Say hi to Snuffles from me and Lucy. _

_Love,  
Harry_

* * *

**_November 7th, 1993_**

_Dearest Julie,_

_Alright, you've opened this now. I want you to sit down on the sofa after you make yourself a cup of tea before reading the rest of this. Take a deep breath, love. _

_Yesterday, Harry fainted on his broom during the quidditch match against Hufflepuff. Dementors got too close on the grounds and confronted him while he was chasing the snitch. Keep breathing. He's absolutely fine, only slightly bruised. His broom has been destroyed, but he'll live. Are you still breathing? Alright, he'll be in the hospital wing overnight, but I'm going to teach him the patronus charm. I think it's time he learned it, especially if his boggart turns into a dementor._

_How are you holding out? You seemed a bit distant in your last letter. Remember that Molly says you're always welcome there, and try to keep bringing fresh food to our friend Snuffles. I know you're struggling with it, Jules, but you know how he is with Kreacher. _

_Lucy is doing brilliantly, by the way. She's got quite a knack for transfiguration according to Minerva. I assume she's inherited that from you and James. _

_I best be off, but Jules, take care of yourself. You know I'm only an owl away._

_Yours,_

_Moony_

* * *

**_Jules' Flat, November 18th, 1993_**

Julianne sat at her kitchen table writing letters to Harry, Lucy and Remus with the Daily Prophet open beside her ink pot on top of another, much more formal, letter from Hogwarts. She played some of Remus' old records on her gramophone. The cool fall air had swept over London almost exactly a week after she had said goodbye to Lucy, Harry and Remus at Platform 9 3/4. Over the past few weeks the weather had continued to get colder and darker. The flat was always quiet and empty despite the music playing in the background. She looked at the photographs on the wall and saw a teenage James looking towards her with an expression of pity. When he noticed that she was looking at him, he playfully stuck his tongue out in the picture which made Jules smile slightly. She took a deep breath and turned back to the letter her daughter had written her hastily.

She traced over the ink on parchment and took a deep breath in. It took everything in her not to demand some sort of teaching position at the castle after Harry's incident with the philosopher's stone. After Ginny was kidnapped the year before and left in the Chamber of Secrets, Julianne remembered arguing with Dumbledore for hours. She had wanted the Defense Against the Dark Arts position, but apparently Dumbledore thought that their lycan friend was a better choice over the former psychiatric patient at Mungo's. It always came back to that.

Julianne sipped her mug of tea and closed her eyes. She reached her hand out and stroked the tawny owl on her dining table with her fingers. The owl nestled in with its feathers, and then let out a little hoot encouraging her to continue.

"Alright, Strix," Jules smiled at the owl she'd had since Lucy was two. "You can stay the night, or you can go back and visit our favourite students." Strix made a little sound and preened his feathers. He rustled around a bit and then held out his leg to have the three envelopes attached. Julianne fumbled a bit as she attached them securely. She gave the owl a little treat before releasing him outside the kitchen window. Once the owl was in the air, she finally noticed that the record had stopped playing. She went over to switch it when she heard scratching at her door.

"You can't be here," Jules said firmly as the black dog at her front door pushed past her and waited for her to close the door. "You've got to be barking mad to think you're allowed to be here!" A pair of grey eyes leveled with hers from the ground. The furry black dog in front of her barked after it dropped a rolled up, aged paper at her feet.

"That is disgusting," Jules said as she nudged the slobbery paper with her toe. She closed the door and locked it. Once the door was closed, she charmed the curtains closed so that Sirius could stretch out in his human form.

"You have to look at it," He said insistently as he rolled his neck from side to side. Jules made a face and met his gaze.

"You smell like wet dog," She crinkled her nose. Sirius took a deep breath and avoided rolling his eyes at Jules. He walked further into the flat and flopped down on her sofa as though he'd always lived there. "How am I supposed to get you back to Grimmauld Place, Padfoot? You know that my apartment is where they check for you every month!"

"Well, they already checked this month," Sirius said nonchalantly. "Besides, I was lonely and I know you must be. Blimey, your place is just a cesspool for potential depression without our favourite wolf around."

"I'm fine on my own," Jules said defensively as she pushed his feet off of her sofa. She stood up with her arms crossed. "You know, if the dementors come here because you're here, then all is lost. I can't save you from them."

"At least I'll die by your side," Sirius smirked. Jules picked up a throw pillow from her armchair and threw it at him. She walked into the kitchen and unrolled the newspaper he'd dragged in with him. Sirius got up and followed her into the kitchen. His eyes searched her face for a reaction.

"It's the Weasleys on their Egypt trip," Julianne said. "I've seen this clipping a thousand times." Before Sirius could protest, she used her wand to crumple up the paper and toss it into the bin. Sirius let out a strangled cry. He ran towards the garbage and started to try fishing it out.

"No! Julianne, you have to look!" He said desperately. "Just look! Look at the picture!"

Jules felt her spine stiffen as she watched him tear up as he desperately uncrumpled the damaged paper. He straightened it out with his hands on the floor and began to shake. His hands trembled as he held it up to her. His eyes looked like the eyes of someone who had been beaten repetitively. His face was contorted into an expression she had so rarely seen on his face when they had been in love before disaster had struck. Sirius looked like a reflection of the woman she had been before her release from St. Mungo's. He had gained a bit of weight since becoming free and hiding in Grimmauld Place, but he was still much smaller than he had ever been before the fateful Halloween when they were both sentenced to very different, very separate jails.

"Please," His voice cracked as he pointed desperately at a 13 year old boy that Julianne knew very well. Julianne gently knelt on the floor in front of Sirius. She took the paper from his hands and stared at Ron. The moving picture shifted and she noticed a rat scurrying out of the happy family's photograph. She recognized the rat. She knew that rat from the various events at the Weasley family home over the years. Julianne felt her heart clench in her chest as she stared at the broken man in front of her.

"Sirius," Julianne said softly. "It's not Peter. It's just Ron's pet. He has a common brown rat. It's not him, Sirius... I'm sorry." Sirius stared at her confounded. He struggled with her words before he collapsed his head into his hands and began to sob. Jules placed the newspaper onto the floor and shuffled her way over to him. She hesitantly reached out her hand and placed it on his shoulder. Jules reflexively began tracing circles around his shoulder. Sirius turned into her and threw himself into her arms. Julianne struggled to keep herself upright as she let Sirius wet her shoulder with her tears.

Julianne held Sirius in her arms for nearly twenty minutes while he struggled with the fact that he still didn't have any proof of his innocence. The only proof he had was the proof that Julianne had discredited. He could barely breathe. He held onto Julianne's blouse as he let himself grieve. He needed freedom, true freedom, like he needed air, water and food. Without any proof, he may as well be back in his prison cell.

* * *

**_December 16th, 1993_**

_Dear Mum,_

_Do you really mean that we're all going to spend Christmas together? ALL of us? Even Snuffles? Where will we spend it? _

_Hogwarts is so beautiful in the snow! Harry brought me back some sweets from Hogsmeade, but then Fred and George said something about a map and made me go away. I really miss you! _

_Ginny and I can't get onto the quidditch team until some of the current team members graduate. All I want to do is be a beater like you were, mum! But Fred and George are really good at it. Maybe I'll be keeper once Oliver Wood graduates!_

_Miss you loads and see you soon,_

_Lucy_

* * *

**_King's Cross Station, December 20th, 1993_**

Julianne watched as the Hogwarts Express pulled into Platform 9 3/4. Students filed out and ran into their parents' waiting arms. Julianne scoured the crowd for her misfits. The first one she saw was a girl with her curly, black hair pulled into a pony tail wearing fuzzy earmuffs. Jules saw a tall, haggard looking man with his shaggy sandy hair and amber eyes behind her, flanked by a young teenage boy who looked like he'd grown a few inches since the last time she'd seen him. Before she knew what she was doing, her arms were waving at them and her smile was wider than it had been in ages.

"Mum!" Lucy grinned as she ran into her mum's waiting arms. "Why didn't you tell me just how _much_ the stairs move!? You know, the fat lady is so much meaner when she's trying to sing and-" Julianne squeezed her daughter into her arms and kissed the top of her head.

"Oh, I've missed you!" Julianne said with a laugh. She stood back from her daughter and inspected her. "You're all in one piece? No petrification? No jellified limbs? No one has tried to jinx you off a broom? No run-ins with Fluffy or a Basilisk?" Jules looked over Lucy's shoulder and winked at her nephew. "And you! What's this I hear about your beautiful Nimbus 2000 being destroyed?" She pulled her nephew into her arms and ruffled his hair. "You've grown! Both of you!" Julianne put one arm around her nephew and the other around her daughter. "Oh, it's so good to see you both in one piece." Remus smiled a small smile as he watched Jules surround herself with the kids as she usually did. Finally, Julianne stood up and let Harry and Lucy run off to collect their trunks. She stood across from Remus and looked at him for a long while.

"Hello stranger," She said. Her smiled shone brightly as she closed the distance between herself and her old friend. She practically jumped into his arms. Remus lifted her up as best he could and squeezed her small frame into his. He placed her back on her feet and stared at her, finally smiling fully.

"You look well, Julie," He teased. "Almost as though you've barely missed us at all!" Jules playfully hit his arm before she linked hers through his and walked with him towards the children.

"As though a day has gone by where I haven't felt the dull ache of a life without you hooligans," Jules leaned her head on her dear friend's shoulder. "It must be amazing to be back at the castle."

"On the contrary," Remus said softly. "It feels like the place is filled with ghosts- more ghosts than the usual suspects. Even though I know Harry is Harry, I still have to do double-takes every time he enters my classroom or office. Every hallway is memories of you, James, Sirius and Peter."

"And your furry, little problem..." Jules added. "Has that been-"

"Severus has helped, actually," Remus said. "He's brewing me a potion that makes it much easier, but there are a few animals I miss..." The pair watched as Harry and Lucy dragged the trunks towards them. They shared a meaningful look before going over and helping them through the portal back to the muggles' side of King's Cross.

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, Later That Day _**

Sirius adjusted his robes over and over again in the full length mirror. He combed his hair with his fingers and took a deep breath as he stared at the haggard stranger he was getting accustomed to acknowledging as himself. He heard the door open and the sound of a girl's giggle and Jules telling sensationalized stories about her days at Hogwarts. He looked at his robes and decided that it was too much. He pulled off the outer robe and stared at his dark purple blazer one last time before heading down the stairs.

He hovered in the threshold of the foyer from the bottom of the stairs. He watched as Remus helped Julianne take off her cloak and she threw her head back laughing. Harry and Lucy began to play scissors, parchment, stone to decide who got the bed closes to the window. Nobody noticed him for a few seconds before Lucy whispered something to her mother and was sent over to him.

"Hello," Sirius said. He swallowed his nerves. Sirius had known this little girl that was apparently genetically part of him as the kind girl that had taken him in when he was a stray dog searching for her mother. They had spent limited time together since he had become himself again, namely a few seconds before Remus had taken her away and Jules had knocked him out, but it had been Lucy's idea to spend Christmas with him included.

"What do I call you?" Lucy jumped straight to the point. As her pet, he had been Snuffles because it was the sound he made as he sniffed the palm of her hand. Since Harry's birthday, since finding out who this man had been, who he'd always be to her, she had talked endlessly to the dog under her bed about it. She had spent hours just processing the fact that her mother was able to fall for someone so cruel, and Snuffles would always lick her cheeks before laying his head across her stomach and letting her scratch behind his ears. Lucy searched this man, this fugitive, this human's face for any sign of the dog she had loved.

"I- um..." Sirius looked over at Jules and Remus who were waiting as patiently as Lucy was for his response. "I'm not- Well, you knew me as my animagi form... And probably as some horrific, sociopathic wizard who was responsible for the murder of your uncle and aunt before you were born..." He looked back at the little girl. Her curls had slipped out of the ponytail that held the majority of her hair out of her face. Her cheeks were flushed with the cold outside. Her eyes were interrogative. She wanted answers. She wanted to know if the confidante she had found in the black dog during the summer could still be found in the man in front of her.

"I've been calling you Snuffles in letters to mum, but I- You're Sirius," She said. Lucy put her hands on her hips to make herself seem more grown up. "You're Sirius Black. You're not really a murderer, you used to be my dog, but you are really my dad, so what do I call you?"

Sirius swallowed the lump that had grown in his throat. He ran a hand through his hair and let out the breath he'd been holding in. "Tell you what, kid," He offered out his hand to her. "I'm Sirius. But if you'd rather call me Snuffles, that works too." Sirius managed to smile at the girl.

Lucy stared at his hand for a few seconds before she threw her arms around his waist and squeezed as tightly as she could. Sirius put his hands onto either of her shoulders and stood frozen for a moment. He hadn't expected this kindness. He expected her to feel betrayed. He expected her to be frightened. Sirius lifted his eyes back up to Jules. Julianne smiled and had turned to look at Remus. Remus had a small smile on his lips, but his eyes looked alert and worried for the life that Sirius had so near to him. Harry walked over to his godfather. Harry held out a hand for Sirius to shake once Lucy had let go.

"Aunt Julie seems to think you're innocent," Harry said quietly once Lucy had run back to her mother.

"Yes," Sirius smiled at the spitting image of his late best friend. "She does."

"If you're lying," Harry's eyes narrowed behind his glasses. "I'll kill you."

Sirius couldn't help but laugh at the thirteen year old in front of him. He found himself pulling the reluctant young teen into his arms and giving him a hug. He couldn't stop laughing. He pulled away from Harry and looked at him for a long time.

"You are exactly like your father, young man," Sirius grinned. "Exactly like him. He'd be glad you were looking out for his sister." Harry backed away from the prisoner. He softened his skeptical expression but left Sirius standing there dejected. He walked over to his trunk and asked where his room was. Sirius gave the directions and watched as he skulked up the stairs.

"Don't be upset," Lucy said. She was standing in front of Remus who had his hands on both of her shoulders. "Harry's just grumpy. Hermione told me that it's because it's his time of month." All three adults burst out laughing. "What?"

* * *

**_Christmas Day, 1993_**

Sirius awoke to the sensation of his mattress jolting him up and down. At the end of his bed he saw a slight figure jumping on his bed. Sirius jumped up and pulled his covers over his chest. He wiped his eyes and they adjusted temporarily to reveal an elated Lucy wearing her flannel pyjamas as she leaped from one side of his legs to the other.

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS!" She yelled as she flopped down beside him giggling. "You're the only one not awake!"

"Did your mother send you?" Sirius said groggily. Lucy nodded and laughed. She propped herself up on her elbows and grinned at him.

"C'mon, Snuffles, it's already 6:30!" Lucy grinned. "Mum says we're not allowed to open presents until everyone's awake." Sirius swung his legs over the side of the bed, defeatedly.

"You are your mother's daughter," He grumbled as he remembered Julianne waking up the entire Potter house every Christmas morning, even when they were well into their teen years, at 5 am. Lucy squealed with joy and barreled down the stairs into the living room. Sirius slowly followed her. He stretched out his back and scratched the back of his head. The smell of coffee wafted up the staircase and he saw Kreacher grumpily slam a door shut.

"Happy Christmas," Remus said as he held up a mug to his mate. "Welcome to the wonderful world of Potter women." Harry was half-asleep on the chaise-lounge and Julianne looked wide awake with her hair pulled into a matching pony tail with Lucy. The pair of them sat in front of the tree grinning at each other. Sirius took the mug of hot coffee gratefully from Remus.

"She never grew up, did she?" Sirius mumbled as he watched Julianne checking all the tags on the Christmas presents.

"Don't let her hear you say that," Remus chuckled as he picked up his own mug.

Julianne picked up a large box and read out the tag, "To Lucy, Love, Uncle Moony." Remus smiled at the excited girl as she tore open the box and ripped through the wrapping paper. Inside the box, with a plush red ribbon wrapped around its throat, was an enchanted stuffed black dog. It leapt from the box and ran around the room a few times before it flopped down beside Lucy and rolled onto its belly. Lucy giggled as she pet the soft toy, and picked it up into her arms. She held it tightly and thanked Remus profusely.

"Well, I knew you missed having a pet, and I also knew that your old one wasn't planning on making a reappearance," Remus laughed while cocking his head towards Sirius.

Jules handed Harry his present from Remus. Harry opened up the haphazard wrapping paper and revealed a leather-bound book about patronuses and three bars of chocolate. Harry grinned at Remus and laughed as Remus winked while he said, "The book is so you study before our lessons start."

Sirius watched the joy on everyone's faces as they opened up the various gifts from one another. Finally, Julianne reached a small envelope that was addressed to Harry from Sirius. The other was very clearly a wrapped book addressed to Lucy. She handed it to Harry, and then gave Sirius a questioning look. She hadn't expected him to give anything to the children and yet he'd clearly concocted some sort of present for each of them.

Harry carefully opened up the envelope. Inside there was a picture of his mother's legs with a baby zipping around the room on a toy broom. He flipped it over. On the back, Sirius had scrawled: _I gave you your first broom when you turned one. You were born to fly, Harry. Check the broom cupboard to the left of the portrait of the first Quidditch Cup winning team when you're back at Hogwarts, and most importantly: don't tell your aunt it was from me. - S_

Harry met Sirius' expectant gaze and smiled at the man. Sirius smiled back, and for the first time, Harry truly believed that he couldn't be awful or horrible. He truly saw the potential of his innocence. Lucy tugged on Harry's arm and whispered something in his ear. Harry smiled at his younger cousin and the pair of them walked over to the tree and pulled out a small parcel.

As Sirius watched the two children walk towards him carrying a small, beautifully wrapped gift, he felt butterflies start to float around his stomach. Harry handed him the parcel and then retreated quickly. Lucy sat at his feet and waited for him to open it up. Inside of the wrapping paper was an ornate box. He lifted the lid of the box and saw a small photo of Lucy and Harry as smaller children sitting together, squished, on Jules' armchair. They waved at him in the photo.

"It's so when you're lonely, you always have someone smiling at you," Lucy said. Sirius looked up at the two of them with tears welling in his eyes.

"Thank you very much," He said softly. Harry shrugged his shoulders and went back to sitting down. Finally, Julianne sat beside Remus on the couch and let Lucy and Harry dig out the presents that they had for the other adults and that the adults had addressed to each other. Lucy handed her mother a perfectly round stone that she had found on the edge of the Black Lake and painted in ornate jewel tones. Harry gave Jules a book on "How to Live Alone" that he had found in Hogsmeade, and she laughed.

"Maybe I should've never signed your permission slip," Jules teased. She kissed the two on the cheeks before she was handed Remus' present. She opened it to reveal a painting she had once admired in Diagon Alley as they passed by. She shook her head at him and smiled to herself.

Remus received a similarly painted stone from Lucy and a book on "Boosting the Wizard's Immune System" from Harry. Jules bit her bottom lip to stop herself from giggling and Sirius disguised his immediate reaction as a laugh. Remus thanked the two children and hugged them both. Finally, Lucy handed Remus and Julianne two rather thick envelopes. The handwriting matched the one found on Harry's envelope.

Julianne felt her heart sink. She thumbed open the envelope and took out the several pages that had been folded up inside of it. As she unfolded them, a photo fell onto her lap. She turned it around, ignoring what had been written there and looked at the photograph of herself with James and Sirius from nearly 20 years previous. Her head was on Sirius' lap, and her feet were on James. They were all grinning and joking with each other. The photograph fell from her hands. Lucy picked it up off the floor and stared at the happy teenage versions of her mother, father and uncle. Harry took it from Lucy and the two cousins exchanged a look before looking over at Jules who had stood up, with the letter still in her hand. A tear slid down her cheek and she excused herself from the room. Sirius stood up and opened his mouth to say something to her, but she shook her head at him and continued upstairs. The sound of a door slamming was heard, and the room fell silent. Sirius deflated. His shoulders slumped forward. His hands covered his face and he sunk into his chair.

Harry flipped over the photograph in his hands and read the inscription: _I would give the world, my life, anything, so that you could have this happiness back. _Remus cleared his throat and carefully removed the picture from Harry's hands.

"Why don't you and Lucy start to clean up the wrapping paper?" He suggested to Harry. "I'm going to go see if I can't scrounge up some bacon." Remus ruffled Harry and Lucy's hair and then headed into the kitchen, summoning Sirius along with him.

Under the tree, there was still one present wrapped up. No one had noticed it as it lay there unopened.

* * *

_Dearest Julianne,_

_I have hurt you in ways that I never thought I was capable. I have a daughter who doesn't know what to call me. I have a godson who thinks I am a traitor. I know that there is nothing I am capable of saying that could change it, but I only wish there was an apology big enough to encompass how truly sorry I feel. _

_Every inch of me aches to see you smile like you once did. I have spent twelve years wishing to see your face, only to find that we have grown into two very different shells of the young, inspired youth we once were. I feel robbed of a life I could have had, and, as you have pointed out, it is me who robbed myself of it. Every night since I've met Lucy, I have dreamed of the life we could have had together: swing sets, broomsticks, nightmares, kissed wounds, and carry sleepy children to their beds. I've imagined family Christmases, with James and Lily, in a world where I never made the foolish mistake that cost them their lives, cost us the lives we deserved._

_It makes no difference if I tell you how deeply, truly and madly I do still love you. It makes no difference if I tell you that I will defend Harry and Lucy as fiercely as I can. There is nothing I can say, nothing I can do, nothing I can change with my words. _

_There has not been one day of the past twelve years that I have not been tortured by the memory of the last time I saw you before I was incarcerated. There has not been a moment that I have stopped loving you either._

_I found this photograph in my room. I thought you'd like to have it. Happy Christmas._

_Forever yours,_

_Sirius_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so there it is. Chapter 6. Sorry for the wait! Hope you enjoyed it. **

**Reviews are a great, greaaat thing. :) Thanks for reading!**


	7. Dust to Dust

**Chapter 7: Dust to Dust**

**A/N: Inspired by The Civil Wars song "Dust to Dust"! Side note, just go look up the Civil Wars and tell me that the male part of the band does not look eerily like movie-Sirius... I'll fight you on it. Enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

_You're like a mirror reflecting me_

_Takes one to know one, so take it from me_

_You've been lonely, you've been lonely too long_

_We've been lonely, we've been lonely, too long_

* * *

**_Hogwarts, September 15th, 1975_**

_Julianne adjusted her quidditch pads and tightened up the laces of her boots as she sat on the bench beside the pitch. James had been appointed as Captain of the Gryffindor team this year. He stood with his chest puffed up, preparing himself for a rousing speech about how this year, they'd win the Quidditch Cup. _

_"I hope it won't be too long," Jules teased as she strode toward her twin. "Some of us actually like to fly, not to only look like we have." _

_"Short and sweet, Julie," James grinned. "Captain's honour." Jules rolled her eyes and punched her brother playfully on the shoulder. "Where's your broom?" _

_"In the cupboard that's currently being occupied," Jules shrugged. She had gotten used to being kept out of the broom cupboard for ungodly amounts of times since Sirius had entered the second term of fourth year. James laughed at his sister's attempt of shrugging off her obvious frustration with the situation. Her shoulders were tense. Her jaw was clenched. After a few moments, more of the team began to leak out of the locker room. Once most of the team arrived, Sirius ran over with tousled hair and a cheeky smile on his face. _

_"Tell me you remembered to grab the quaffles..." James looked at his empty-handed friend._

_"Are you joking," Jules said. "He couldn't even remember to pull his turtleneck up high enough to cover that bloody hickey." _

_"Jealous, Julie?" Sirius winked. Julianne mimed gagging._

_"Not in the slightest," She stuck her tongue out at him. "I happen to like boys with standards." _

_"Too bad they're not interested in you," James teased. Sirius laughed and reached for a high-five from James. Mary MacDonald, a chaser, snickered, and then abruptly stopped as soon as she remembered that Jules was carrying not only a wand, but a beater's bat. Christopher O'Malley, a sixth year and the keeper of the team, cleared his throat._

_"Captain," Christopher' s Irish lilt cut through the twin bickering that had erupted. "Two things: first of all, d'you actually have any drills fer us? Secondly, I'm actually quite interested in your sister, and I'd like to think my standards are a bit higher than yer mate's." _

_James and Sirius both froze. They turned and looked at the tall student that held his broom at his side, then they turned to face Julianne whose cheeks began to turn a bright shade of red. She excused herself, and went to gather her broom and the balls for practice. _

_"O'Malley, are you serious?" James asked once Jules had left. "Or were you just saying that to be nice?" _

_"Obviously, he's just trying to make her feel better," Sirius said before Christopher had a chance to respond. "It's Jules, we're talking about. I mean... Honestly. She's hopeless. Barely a gir-"_

_"Well, aren't you two just little rays of sunshine," Christopher said cutting off Sirius' explanation. "I think Jules is grand. You two are right pricks for teasin' her like that." _

_When Jules returned with the gear for practice, nobody said another word. It wasn't until Jules was changing in the locker room that Mary MacDonald and Holly Cresswell told her about what O'Malley had said once she left. The three girls left the locker room giggling, blushing and whispering to each other. James and Sirius watched perplexed as Christopher chased down Julianne seeing that she had left before him._

_"I suppose there really is someone for everyone," Sirius said. "Even if the someone is just an Irish bogtrotter." _

_"Now who's jealous," James laughed. He shoved Sirius and then raced away from him as Sirius turned to chase him down the stone halls yelling "Am not!"_

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, January 20th, 1994_**

Sirius traced his fingers over the leather cover of the photo album that had been left ornately wrapped under the tree after the letter fiasco. He opened up the heavy cover and stared at a picture of an exhausted Julianne. Sweat covered her face and mingled with tears along her cheeks. She held a small, wailing baby and she stroked the round cheeks of the newborn. This Julianne looked so different from the one he knew now and the one he had known. She was bonier in a way that hinted at malnourishment. Hr hair was cropped short, and though she smiled at the new-found joy in her life, she looked void of pleasure. The Julianne in the picture looked up at the camera and her smile fell from her face. She stared outward, and her face became stiff and distant. Sirius forced himself to flip the page.

The next photograph was of Remus holding a slightly older, chubby baby on one knee and a toddler Sirius recognized as Harry on the other. The babies were smiling and the younger one began to chew on the buttons on Remus' robes. Harry giggled and tugged at Remus' longish ponytail. Sirius chuckled as he saw Moony struggle to keep calm as the infants using him as a playground. He flipped the page and saw baby Lucy sitting in front of a cake, surrounded by red-headed children and toddlers. Julianne had hair that grazed the tops of her shoulders. She helped the toddler stay upright and helped her blow out the candles in the photo.

Sirius continued turning page after page. He inspected each image of the past twelve years. There were birthdays, Christmases, and first steps. As he reached the last page, he saw an envelope with Julianne's initials monogrammed on the top left corner. It had his name scrawled over it in her loopy, cursive writing. He opened it up and inside there was a slip of paper that read: _It can't take you back, but it can guide you through what was missed. Happy Christmas, Padfoot. _

Sirius slipped the parchment back into the envelope and tucked it into the back page once more. He flipped all of the album pages back to the front and followed along. He watched Lucy grow from a squishy little thing to a prepubescent girl. He watched Harry grow to the young man he had met. He watched Julianne throw herself into her family instead of facing her guilt and grief. He saw Remus step in the photo where he imagined he should have been. They were together, but they had still managed to be so alone in their loss. He kept searching the photos, hoping that maybe if he kept turning the pages he could change the results, but he was absent from every page. He finally closed the photo album and leaned his head in his hands.

Julianne hovered in the doorway watching Sirius flip through her gift. He hadn't heard her come in with his food for the week. She had frozen in her place when she saw him gently inspecting each photo. She watched his fingertips graze over the moving images in front of him. He closed the album and she decided that she had to move quickly. She walked in, and didn't say a word. She simply enchanted the food as she always had to organize itself.

Sirius' head snapped up as he saw Julianne's figure shift into the dining room. He didn't say a word as she went about her business. He couldn't bring himself to say anything. His mouth ran dry.

"I'm sorry," Sirius finally managed to cough up.

"You say that every time I'm here," Julianne ran her fingertips through the ends of her hair. She adjusted her robes and dug around her pocket for a moment. She placed two envelopes on the table that had been addressed to Sirius from Lucy and Harry. The two stared at each other for a moment. She had nothing to say to him. Her insides ached like she had eaten too much candy at the sight of his puppy dog eyes and apologetic frown. There were no words she could find, no strength she could dig up to force herself to accept the present he'd given her. She knew it wasn't much. She knew it was all he could do. She knew it was the thought that counted, but the picture, the letter, the apologies, his existence in her life again... Julianne couldn't face it. Jules did the one thing she did best. She told Sirius she'd see him next week and she left Grimmauld Place before any anger or resentment could threaten to boil up inside of her.

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, February 18th, 1994_**

"It's not _him_, Sirius!" Jules screamed across the living room. A broken picture frame was on the floor beside her and at her feet was the vase she had smashed from the mantlepiece. Her hands shook with a mix of rage and terror. The burning sensation that spread from her tear ducts to her sinuses told her that soon her cheeks would be furnished with tears.

"Why don't you believe me?! Why don't you see it?" Sirius ran his hands through his hair. "The _toe _is missing! On the right hand! It's Peter! It's got to be Peter! It's like you're _trying_ to avoid justice. It's like you don't want the man responsible for James' death to get caught!" Sirius kicked aside the coffee table out of frustration. "Twelve years, Julianne! _Twelve._ Years! I have waited-"

"You've waited," Julianne's voice dropped dangerously low. "_You_ have waited! I forgot! You were the only victim of that night. That must have slipped my mind while I was under calming draught at St. Mungo's! Because _I'm_ the crazy one!" She let out a bitter, cold laugh before leveling her gaze with his and stepping closer to him. The crunch of broken glass beneath her shoes only made her more determined. "It. Is. _Not_. Peter! Let it go, Sirius! Just... Let it go! It's not him. It _can't_ be him! It's not possible! It's just not!"

Sirius stepped closer to her. It had started as an intimidation method, but, as he inched closer, he ended up close enough that she could feel his breath on her forehead. Sirius tilted her chin up so she could look him in the eye. Frustration with this stubborn women coursed through him. He felt the blood boiling in his veins as he looked at the thin line her usually shapely mouth formed. Sirius couldn't decide if he wanted to ring her neck or kiss her neck. Why was she always so set_; _so difficult?

"You're in denial, Julie," His words were imprinted into her skull. Her vision blurred. Her breath caught. For a fraction of a second, she threatened to lean into him. Sirius grazed his thumb across her forehead and down the side of her face. A shiver crawled up her spine, and her mouth fell slightly open.

"No," Jules whispered. Her eyes were glued to his lips behind her glasses. A tear made its descent down her cheek. "You are."

In an instant, there was a _pop_ and Jules disappeared. Sirius dropped his hand. He looked around the dark living room and at the broken picture on the floor. Sirius sunk onto the arm of the sofa and put his head in his hands.

* * *

**_February 20th, 1994_**

_Dear Mum,_

_Professor Snape still doesn't like me. It doesn't matter how hard I study, or if I actually get the potion right... I could ace every test, and he'd still hate me. He makes jokes about Snuffles and is impolite to Uncle Moony._

_Apart from that, I still love Hogwarts. The Black Lake is terribly cold though. Did you ever swim in it? Uncle Moony said you did once, but he said I should ask you. _

_Harry's new Firebolt passed all inspection. No jinxes or anything, so he's free to fly it. The enchantment on the stuffed dog wore off, but it's so soft, I can't bare to stop sleeping with it._

_Can't wait for the summer to see you! Harry said when we're at the Burrow he'll train me for quidditch try-outs next year! _

_Love you,_

_Lucy_

_P.S. Hermione got bad news about Buckbeak, but I only overheard it and I don't think I'm supposed to know._

* * *

**_Hogwarts, October 9th, 1975_**

_"Give it back," Jules put her hands on her hips. "Stop being such berks! Just give me the note back!" _

_James held the letter just out of her reach and then yanked it away quickly. He laughed at his sister's futile attempts at recovering her note. Julianne chased after him as he walked around the shoreline of the lake. _

_"I never knew O'Malley was such a poet," James snickered. "Oy, Sirius, you've got to read this!" James called. He held up the parchment and waved it to summon his friend. Sirius strut over with a crooked grin plastered on his face. His long hair fell in his eyes, so he pushed it behind his ears._

_"What is it?" Sirius asked with an eyebrow raised. He took the parchment from James and Jules let out a frustrated groan. _

_"James, you're the biggest-" Julianne started to insult her twin, but he cut her off._

_"Oh, Julie," He feigned being touched. "You love me, darling." James grinned and egged on Sirius, "Go on, mate. Read it out for us!" _

_Sirius cleared his throat and puffed out his chest. He prepared himself to read out quite possibly the worst poem he'd ever read in his life._

_"So help me, Sirius Black, if you start to read that, I'll- I'll... I'll cut your hair!" Julianne's weak threat made Sirius and James erupt with laughter. Behind Julianne, Remus ran up to them. _

_"What's going on? Why are you so cross?" Remus said breathlessly._

_"Chris wrote me a touching note, and these two are about to butcher it," Jules folded her arms across her chest. Sirius and James looked at each other and made their game plan._

_"Us? Butcher the poem?" James said placing his hand on his heart. "Julianne, I am astonished that you would think I'm capable of such a thing!"_

_"Besides, Julie," Sirius winked. "Hard to butcher something that's already dead." _

_Jules threw her arms in the air. She looked at Remus and pleaded with her eyes that he put a stop to it. Unapologetically, Remus crossed sides. He stood next to Sirius and grinned._

_"Let's hear it then," Remus said. Sirius cleared his throat once more and prepared himself. He put on a fake brooding face and squinted so that he thought he looked like the perfect teen heartthrob. _

_"Darling Julianne," Sirius said with mock sincerity in his voice. "I never knew happiness until I met you. You look like a periwinkle when you wear blue. When you smile it's like the sun sees you.- Ouf, ran out of words that rhyme with 'you'? That's a bit pathetic." _

_James snatched the note back, "Don't stop now, it's about to get good!" _

_"Better than using you to rhyme twice?" Remus said. "Not sure that's possible..." _

_Julianne stepped towards them, trying to catch them off guard to snatch back the note. James held it high above his head. The sudden shift of focus made Jules lose her balance. The three boys snickered as she staggered trying to regain her balance. Jules shoved her twin brother out of her embarrassment and frustration. The laughter stopped. _

_"Just because you're not capable of saying two words to Evans without making fun of Severus doesn't mean you should ruin this for me," Jules said sharply. Her hair fell in front of her face and she shoved it out of her forehead quickly. She turned to Sirius, "And _you_! Just because you're incapable of original thought or romantic gestures doesn't mean that you're a better man than Christopher. And as for you," Jules turned to Remus. "Frankly, I just expected better. Now, give it here." _

_Guiltily, the three boys handed her the parchment. Jules tucked it into the sleeve of her sweater and stormed back to the castle._

_"Merlin," Sirius muttered under his breath. "She used to be a lot more fun until that O'Malley bloke decided to inflate her ego." James nodded in agreement and Remus let out a snort of laughter. James and Sirius' heads snapped to look at him incredulously._

_"What's so funny?" James asked. _

_"Julie's ego?" Remus snickered, thinking that Sirius was being self-deprecating. After a long silence where neither James nor Sirius laughed, Remus swallowed awkwardly. "Uh... Have you two seen Peter? Because I haven't. See you later!" Remus ran off from them and waved as he left. _

* * *

**_Hogwarts, January 19th, 1976_**

_Sirius entered the Common Room after a late night snog session with a girl from Hufflepuff. The room was entirely empty, except for Julianne sitting by the fireplace. She sat in the biggest arm chair with her legs tucked to the side underneath of her. She leaned her chin on her hand as she stared into the fireplace. Sirius wasn't sure if it was just the lighting, or if her cheeks were wet. Jules was chewing on her bottom lip. She was wearing a Quidditch training shirt and her pyjama bottoms. Her hair was pulled into a knot at the back of her head._

_"You're up late," Sirius said softly. Jules leapt up with a start. _

_"So are you," She replied with a scratchy, tear-filled voice. Her hands wiped her cheeks and put on a pathetic attempt for a smile. "Out late with Charity?"_

_"You mean Charlotte," Sirius corrected with a smile. _

_"Who's Charlotte?" Jules tugged her sleeves over her hands and raised her eyebrow. _

_"You know, the blonde," Sirius shrugged. "The blonde from Hufflepuff." _

_"They're always blondes from Hufflepuff, honestly," Jules pushed the loose strands of hair by her cheeks behind her ear. Her nose started to run, so she sniffed it back and wiped her eyes again when tears threatened to start falling again._

_"Julie," Sirius said tentatively. "Are you alright?" _

_"Yeah," Jules said. Her voice started to crack again. "Yeah, I'm just- just fine. Just bloody perfect." Her bottom lip started to quiver and her voice came out as nothing but a squeak as she added, "It's only allergies..." Jules burst into tears again and started mumbling incomprehensibly._

_Sirius stared at her open-mouthed for a moment as he registered what was happening in front of him. _

_"D'you need a tissue?" Sirius asked. He was alarmed. He had no idea what to do. He'd often seen girls cry, but never Jules. Jules got cross. She stomped her feet. She dug her heels in. She yelled, or cursed, or hit people, well, she hit James. Julianne was practically male. _

_Jules shook her head morosely and let out a sob as she said, "I was just so stupid..." _

_Sirius froze. He crossed the common room to Jules and did something he'd never done before. He walked over and wrapped his arms around his friend's twin. He let her lean her head on his chest and didn't even complain when he felt snot and tears soaking through his shirt._

_"You're not stupid," Sirius said gently. "You're... I mean, you're not in the Slug Club with Evans, but if McGonnagal had a Mc- a McClub, I'm sure she'd let you in..." _

_Julianne let out another sob into Sirius' chest and she sniffed back a gob of snot that threatened to fall out of her nostril. Sirius cringed and thanked the stars that she couldn't see his face. _

_"I'm sure Christopher doesn't think you're stupid," Sirius said. Jules let out an even louder sob and a cold reality froze in Sirius' spine. "Jules, what happened?" _

_Jules whimpered and inadvertently wiped her snot all across the front of Sirius' shirt as she shook her head in refusal to his question. _

_"What did he do?" Sirius felt a mixture of heat and cold coursing through his veins. He saw red. His arms loosened around her and he grabbed her shoulders. "Jules, did he touch you? Did he _hurt_ you?" Suave bastard, Sirius thought. He wrote poems. He took her for picnics. Sirius knew the game. He knew the tricks, the ways to get a girl to- "No." _

_Sirius let go of her shoulders and stepped back. "Jules, you didn't... Not with O'Malley. Oh, Merlin's beard, you did. Didn't you?" _

_"What?" Jules straightened up. "No, of course not! That's why he broke it off..." Jules wiped her tears with the back of her hand. "I just didn't want to, but he was so insistent, and we had a row, and..." Tears welled up again. "He didn't love me." _

_Sirius let out a sigh of relief. He hugged Julianne tightly into his chest._

_"Oh, thank Godric, it wasn't with the irishman," He thought out loud, thinking that he was the only one to hear it. Jules squirmed around in his grip. She pushed him off of her._

_"Thank Godric it wasn't with the irishman?" She said indignantly. "What is that supposed to mean?" _

_Sirius' eyes widened. He stepped backwards and shrugged. "Nothing, don't worry yourself about it. Have a good night! Sleep well!" Sirius smiled and waved as he backed up quickly and then leapt up the stairs to the boys' dormitory in steps of three._

_As he entered the dormitory, he shook his head and started unbuttoning his now disgusting shirt. Sirius ran his hands through his hair and slipped into a soft cotton shirt and his boxers. He heard someone shift in their bed. James sat up and turned on a side lamp._

_"You look rough," James grumbled as he reached for his glasses and rubbed some sleep out of his eyes. He slipped on his glasses and added, "Wow, even when you're in focus you look rough. What happened?"_

_"Nothing," Sirius shrugged. "Well, I mean, nothing for me. Jules was crying downstairs, though."_

_"What?" James jumped to his feet and stared open-mouthed at his best friend. "Is she alright? Is she hurt? Was it _him?_" _

_"No, it wasn't," Sirius said calmly. He got into bed. "She'll live, mate. She's just shaken up is all. I don't think we'll have to deal with them as a couple anymore..." He yawned. "Maybe she'll hit him with a bludger in the next match... Wouldn't that be fun?" _

_James yawned as well and sat back down on the edge of his bed. He made a mental note to ask Jules if she was doing alright at breakfast and then slid back under the covers._

* * *

**_Godric's Hollow, March 27th, 1994_**

Jules sat in front of James and Lily's grave with a bouquet of calla lilies. She placed them on top of the headstone and took a deep breath. She hadn't visited the graveyard in too long. She made sure she came at least twice a year: once on the anniversary of their deaths, and once on James' birthday, her birthday. If things weren't awful, she tried to visit on Lily's birthday, too. Things were generally alright. When the children were younger, she'd take them to visit as well and pay their respects. Remus would visit every now and again. Once or twice they'd even had tea with old Bathilda, but she'd gone positively batty so that stopped abruptly when Lucy was 3.

"Happy birthday, Jamie," Jules whispered. "A lot has happened since I was last here. I'm sorry it's been so long. Don't think it's because I don't miss you." Her voice cracked up a little. "I do. I miss you so much each day. It doesn't get better." Jules wiped her eyes. "I do have a bone to pick with you, however," She laughed a bit, imagining James sitting across from her and picking at the flowers she brought.

"Why couldn't you just tell me that you and Sirius made the secret agreement about the secret keeper? I mean, why couldn't you just-" Jules inhaled sharply. "I know you wanted me safe. But I wanted _you_ safe. I'm sure it wasn't Lily's idea. She should be right cross with you, you know. I nearly gave Padfoot a concussion... He got out of Azkaban. He was in his animagi form and Lucy took him in because, bless her, she just can't say no to puppy dog eyes."

Jules smiled to herself. She could just picture James grinning at her. She imagined him asking where Sirius was, and then teasing her for being so bitter in her old age.

"I am not bitter," Jules said quickly to the gravestone. "I'm not. I'm just... Cross. I'm cross with both of you for lying to me. Not you, of course, Lils. I get why you did, because you're husband is- was a stubborn arse..." She tilted her head to the side and started to get up.

"I have to go," She said softly. "I love you, James." Jules kissed her fingertips and touched them to the gravestone. She walked away and apparated to the first place her mind thought of.

As she stood outside of 11 and 13 Grimmauld Place, something that felt like a stone sunk deep in her chest. Jules revealed the house and walked inside. It was silent, except for Kreacher muttering about his mistress. Julianne's heart began to race.

"Sirius?" She called out. There was no response. She strode inside and Kreacher refused to acknowledge her. He continued fretting about, doing nothing. "Sirius!" Julianne's head began to spin. She ran up the stairs, "Sirius, where are you?" Silence. She kicked open doors, tore through closets and her breathing started to speed up. She went up to the third floor. "Sirius!?" Her voice was shrill and frantic. She heard the floorboards creak behind her. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up on end.

"Jules! Happy birthday," Sirius grinned lopsidedly at her.

"Where were you? I was calling and calling and you didn't answer!" Jules threw her arms around him before she could think better of it. "I thought Kreacher had told someone! I thought that dementors had gotten to you! I thought- You're wet," Julianne let go and staggered back. Sirius had a towel wrapped around his waist and nothing else. She immediately averted her eyes.

"I was in the shower," Sirius chuckled. "I heard you running around my house. I wasn't expecting you to show up- Why did you think Kreacher ratted me out?"

Jules teared up. Her cheeks began to flush, "Because you're a prick to him even though I tell you not to be, so I worry I thought- I thought that I had-"

Sirius stared at her in astonishment, "You thought I'd gone on the run, or that I was found out and sent back. You were worried you'd lost me." It was Sirius' turn. He pulled her into a damp hug and held her too tightly. "Did you visit him?" He whispered into her ear.

Jules nodded. She wrapped her arms around Sirius and let herself be embraced. She inhaled and melted into him despite the discomfort of his damp skin against her dry clothing. Sirius knotted his fingers in her hair and held her there for a moment.

"Julie," He said softly. "I'm not going anywhere, alright? I promise. This time I mean it. You can always find me here."

Jules felt the dam burst inside of her. Tears flowed as she clutched onto him and cried until she couldn't cry anymore.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks for reading! Reviews are allllways welcome! :)**


	8. I Knew Better

**A/N: Writing keeps me from doing my readings for class. I'm a good student, really... Enjoy! :)**

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, April 4th, 1994_**

Julianne walked into the narrow hallway with Strix the tawny owl perched on her shoulder. She held an envelope in her hand and tore open using her thumb and forefinger to wiggle inside the sealed parchment. She discarded the envelope and apologized to Kreacher as she unfolded the parchment. Her eyes scanned the page and a smile spread across her face.

"Padfoot," Jules called up the stairs. "You'll never guess-"

"Ron and Hermione kissed?" Sirius called back down to her. His feet padded around as he turned the corner and came down the stairs.

"Oh, please," Jules dismissed him. "Hermione'll end up with Harry. She'd be good for him. Like Lily was for James... No, she hit Lucius and Narcissa's son, Draco!" Sirius laughed and shook his head.

"The git likely deserved it, it's him that gives Harry the hard time, yeah?" He asked. Jules put her hand up to his face to shush him as she continued reading. Sirius continued, "And, Jules, I think you're wrong about Hermione. I think she's much more like you than Lily."

"I never hit a Malfoy," Jules grumbled as she continued reading the letter and walked into the kitchen. Strix hopped off her shoulder and perched on the top of a dining chair. He ruffled his feathers and got settled in comfortably. Sirius chuckled.

"No, but as I recall, you did throw something at a Malfoy," He sat down across the table from Julianne. Since the week before, Julianne had come over almost every day. She cooked, she cleaned, and she was kind to Kreacher. The strangest part was that since Sirius had made his promise, she had been making an effort to always find him when she was lonely.

Jules was lonely most days. The first 18 years of her life she had spent at the side of her brother. The three years following that she was always with him, Lily, Sirius or Remus and Peter. Julianne had never been alone even for the six months she spent in St. Mungo's, but that barely counted as she was so dissociative it didn't make much of a difference. Once Lucy was born, she was never alone. Molly and Remus took shifts. This was the first time in her life she'd ever been forced to face the emptiness of a home she'd forged for herself. Sirius had held her while she cried like she always did as she aged without half of her. Sirius held her and promised she could always find him, and Julianne found herself believing him.

"Well, it didn't hit him, and he was a Death Eater," Jules shrugged. Her eyes scanned a sentence that her daughter had written. Sirius noticed as her shoulders stiffened and her mouth tensed into a thin line. "Harry has the map," She said.

"The... The _map_ map? He has the- How on earth did he get ahold of that?" Sirius ran his hand through his hair and propped his elbows on the table. "There's got to be a misunderstanding..."

"_Fred and George gave Harry the coolest thing, mum. You can't tell him I told you, so don't be cross! But it's a map that shows all the passage ways of Hogwarts and the locations of everyone in the school but only if you know the secret code!" _Jules read out. "_Once Harry was using it to roam the halls late at night, and he ran into Professor Snape. Snape got all cross, but Harry charmed it to be blank and then it called Snape an ugly git with slimeball hair!" _She looked up across at Sirius. "Really? You _had_ to charm it with the teenage versions of yourselves."

Sirius clutched his sides laughing. He shook his head and sobered up when he noticed the unimpressed expression.

"It was for Moony," Sirius said. "So that he could be safe during his time of month. Oh, come on... You're still cross because we left you out?"

"No," Jules said quickly. "I'm completely over it. Boys will be boys." Her eyes darted back down to the letter. She finished reading it and handed it to Sirius so he could read it. She walked into the kitchen and put the kettle on to boil.

Sirius observed Julianne as she stood in the kitchen that could have been theirs. She pushed her hair behind her ears and opened up the cupboard to sift through the various different types of teas she had brought to the house over the past eight months. He held the letter in his hands, but couldn't bring himself to look away. The past week had been the nicest he'd had since before the outbreak of war. Jules had civil conversations with him. Neither of them had shouted or said things that they regretted. They had been tentative the first few days, but then they had fallen into old habits. Julianne talked to him, really talked to him. Sirius knew it was only because she had no one else to talk to and Remus had been sending less and less letters to try and ween her off the need to smother the children. It still made all the difference. He hated being stuck in this house, but with Jules around it made it easier. As Sirius watched her fuss around in the kitchen, he was so enchanted that he didn't notice Strix fly over to him. Strix perched beside Sirius on the table and let out a hoot to announce his proximity to the fugitive.

Sirius jumped at the sound of the owl and turned his head back to the letter. He stroked the owl's head and tried to refocus his attention.

* * *

**_Gryffindor Common Room, February 25th, 1973_**

_Julianne sat down beside her twin on the plush sofa. She pulled out her potions homework and started flipping through her textbook. She glanced over to the side where James had shoved a few ripped out pages of a book into his notes to hide them. He was studying them with more interest than he'd ever looked at homework before in his life._

_"Drawings of Lily?" Jules teased as she turned her head back to her notes. James chuckled._

_"No, just something to help Remus with his furry little problem," James smiled wryly. Jules' head snapped around._

_"What do you mean?" She lowered her voice to a sharp whisper. James shrugged his shoulders._

_"Leave it to me and the lads, Julie," He smiled. Jules rolled up her parchment and smacked her brother over the head._

_"To the lads? You and the lads? As if, James Potter," She hissed. "What are you lot up to? Is it a potion?" She studied his face for a reaction. "No, it's not. Right, so you're planning on a charm? An immobilizing spell? No? Neither? Transfiguration... James! You're not thinking of becoming animagi, are you?" _

_"Shhh," James put his fingers to his lips. "I mean, we can't legally yet... But just imagine if Remus could have us with him! If he could have someone to support him through the transition. It could take years..." _

_"You were going to leave me out," Jules said with hurt seeping into her tone. "Remus is my mate too, you know."_

_"I know, Jules, but I mean... There's no guarantee any of us can do it, and we were going to do it just us guys," James said awkwardly. "It's nothing personal." _

_Julianne stood up from the table. She folded up her notes and left, muttering to herself. Nothing personal, she thought. There was no way she was going to let them leave her out of something as cool as that. _

* * *

**_The Potter Manor, July 19th, 1975_**

_"Jules," James yelled up the stairs. "Julie, you've got to see this!"_

_Jules rushed down from her room and saw James sitting around the living room with stacks of books and notes scattered all around the floor. Remus sat on the sofa looking rather amused. On the floor in front of him was a rat that scurried over to Jules and up her leg, causing her to scream._

_"OH! OH GODRIC! GET IT OFF!" Jules shrieked as she squirmed as the rat made its way to her shoulder. James burst out laughing, and as he started to laugh a big fluffy dog made its way over to Jules leg and leaned up against her, panting. "JAMES! Are you running a bloody zoo!? Why did you let these things into the house! REMUS!" Without warning, the dog started to change beside her. The next thing she realized Sirius Black was standing beside her laughing. He walked over to James and gave him a high five. Jules picked up the rat on her shoulder with two fingers and tossed it to the floor. She made a face and shivered a little._

_The rat turned into Peter, who also laughed at her disdain. Jules' face contorted into shock and her eyes shifted between the three boys in front of her. James and Remus snickered at her horror. _

_"You- you did it," Jules said quietly. "You actually... You bloody well became animagi." Her astonishment was evident in the way she gaped at her brother and friends. _

_"Isn't it wicked?" Peter grinned. "I'm a rat. I get to scurry around and hide in the darkest corners! Think of all the fun that'll be," He laughed. A small smile started to spread across her face._

_"And what about you, James?" She asked. James grinned at his twin. Sirius and Peter gave him some space. In the middle of the living room, James began to morph into a stag. He scraped the floor with his hoof and made eye contact with Jules. Mesmerized, she approached him, but just as she reached to touch his nose, James changed back. He lifted his twin into his arms and laughed._

_"We did it, Julie," James said enthusiastically. "What about you? Have you had any luck?" _

_As James placed her down on the floor, she shifted her weight from one foot to another. _

_She shrugged her shoulders and said, "I dunno. I haven't given it a try since we put ourselves through training... I'll probably just be something useless like... Like a tunafish or something." She smiled at her brother. "You lot can play heroes this time." _

_Julianne hugged James and laughed, "Now what are you going to call yourselves?"_

_The five of them sat down, and discussed the Marauders, as well as their code names. _

* * *

**_April 30th, 1994_**

_Dear Aunt Jules,_

_I WON THE QUIDDITCH CUP! Well, at least, the Gryffindor team did... But I'm the seeker, so that means that essentially I won! So when are you going to tell me the significance of the Marauder's Map... It was you and my dad, wasn't it? You, Dad, Uncle Remus, Sirius and Peter! You must have done it... _

_Hermione's really tired all the time. She dropped out of divination. She's also having another row with Ron about Scabbers. He keeps going missing, and Ron always blames her cat. _

_Other than that, things are great. Lucy's made friends with the Creevey's. I think one of them may like her a bit much, but I'll keep my eye on her for you. _

_Just think, only two more months and I'll be home!_

_Love you,_

_Harry_

_PS. Dementors haven't been bad lately, but my patronus charm is really coming along! _

* * *

**_May 19th, 1994_**

_Things are hectic here, Jules. Forgive me for not writing. I'll see you soon enough._

_The kids send their love._

_Yours,_

_Remus_

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, May 30th, 1994_**

The narrow hallway felt constricting as she unfolded the parchment from her latest batch of letters. As she unfolded the first letter from Lucy, Sirius came barreling down the stairs. Jules' eyes skimmed the parchment the first time. Sirius hovered in the foyer as Julianne's feet stopped walking and her hands began to tremble.

"Jules?" Sirius asked. He took a step towards her when she didn't acknowledge his voice.

Julianne read and reread the third line of the second paragraph of Harry's letter over and over again. It didn't make sense. Flashes of broken photos, smashed vases and screaming bloody murder across the rooms of this house, this building, made her head spin. Her heart pounded against her ribcage. Her lungs struggled to find the air to keep oxygen flowing through her veins.

"What's wrong," Sirius reached for the letter in her hands. He touched the outside edges, and her eyes flicked up to his. In an instant, her knees felt weak. She collapsed, leaving Sirius to catch her.

"Julianne!" He held her up as she clutched the parchment. "Talk to me. C'mon, love."

Jules opened her mouth to say something, anything, but all she saw was the rat with the missing toe on Ron's shoulder. She heard Molly's voice echoing around her skull. _That rat has lived longer than it ought've._ Sirius screaming that it was him, that he was innocent. Jules couldn't form words. Her tongue felt like sandpaper, her throat felt like the Sahara, and she couldn't see straight.

Sirius held her as she started to shake more and more, before finally tears welled in her eyes and Jules pulled away from him. She steadied herself on the wall clutching Harry's letter tightly in her hand. Julianne could barely breathe. She started to speak a mile a minute.

"It's him," She whispered. "It's him. You were right. It's him. The rat. The rat! Scabbers is _him!_ Oh, Godric. He's with them! He's with them right now! HE'S IN THE CASTLE." Julianne started to scream. All facades of sanity crumbled away, Sirius watched helplessly as she started to tear at her hair and scream. "HE'S IN THE CASTLE! HE'S WITH LUCY! THE MAP! THE MAP NEVER LIES!"

"Jules, you're not making sense," Sirius stared at her. He knew full well what she was on about. He knew full well what he was witnessing. Julianne turned to him, her eyes looking as though she had travelled a world away. She wouldn't stop screaming. She ripped the curtains off of his mother's portrait and his ears filled with the insane ramblings of the woman he hated and the woman he loved. She tore through the house until she finally collapsed into incoherent screams and sobs. Julianne could only see corpses. She could only see James, lifeless on the stairs. His glasses skewed from his face. His eyes glazed over. She crumbled to the floor and grabbed fistfuls of her hair. She curled her knees up to her chest and started sobbing. "No, I can't lose them. I can't lose them. He's... He can't take them from me."

* * *

**A/N: Annnnnd if anyone out there is still reading this, I hope you liked it. :) **


	9. I Solemnly Swear I Am Up to No Good

**A/N: This chapter has been in bits and pieces of pre-written stuff I came up with when working on the idea of the story... So forgive me if it seems piecemeal, because that's exactly what it is! I'll be flushing a lot of this out later, so I hope you enjoy! :) Thanks for reading!**

* * *

**_Hogwarts, May 10th, 1976_**

_"Evans!" Jules called after the redhead as she chased her from the greenhouse to the castle. "Hey, wait!"_

_"What do you want, Jules?" Lily said. Her green eyes were cold as ice as she turned to face Jules. She put her hands on her hips and waited expectantly. "Gotten bored of hanging around with your brother's gang of bullies? Decided after five years you're ready to grow up?"_

_"Oh, you wound me," Jules rolled her eyes. "Besides, I do have friends outside of James' mates. The trouble is most of them are friends with _you _or have ended up in a broom cupboard with Sirius." She pushed her glasses back up her nose and looked at the girl that had stolen most of James' attention for the past three years. She was pretty, Jules would give her that, but she could be so righteous sometimes. _

_"Did you actually have something of importance to ask me," Lily said. "Or did James ask you to ask me to Hogsmeade? Because I already told that arrogant toerag no."_

_"This has nothing to do with the arrogant toerag," Jules sighed. "I actually... I need... I know that we don't get along, and you hate James. I know you don't approve of what they do, but they're loyal and they're kind and- Look, can we bury the hatchet? Because I'm going to flunk potions and I need help. You're the smartest witch I know." _

_"The smartest witch? Even though I'm muggle-born?" Lily looked down at her feet. Jules snorted in outrage._

_"You think that has anything to do with it?" Jules said. "Please. You can out duel more than half of the purebloods at this bloody school... Take it from me!" _

_The two girls stood across from each other. A small smile spread across the redhead's face and she looked at Jules for a long time in silence. Jules shifted her weight from side to side and ran her hands through her hair. _

_"I'll help you," Lily finally said. "On the condition that you get your brother to leave me alone."_

_"I can't," Jules laughed. "You think I can get him to leave you alone? Please! I can't get him to leave _me_ alone." _

_Lily deflated. Jules took a deep breath. _

_"I can get him to leave you alone for the rest of the month, or I can try, at least," Jules added. Lily contemplated her options once more. After another moment of silence, Lily finally agreed and Jules ran over to her with a huge grin on her face. She threw her arms around the girl and started to laugh._

_"Thank you! Thank you, thank you!" Jules squealed. Lily awkwardly stood frozen as Jules squeezed her, before she finally relented and hugged the girl she had told off not weeks before for bystanding while her twin terrorized her best friend- her former best friend._

_"You're... You're welcome," Lily said. _

_"Whoaaaa," Sirius Black's voice called out. "Girl on girl! Maybe that's why she turned you down, mate. She's into your sister!" _

_Jules let go of Lily and cringed apologetically. The two girls looked at each other for a moment and turned to face the four boys that were about three yards away from them. James had an eyebrow raised. Sirius and Peter started cat-calling and jeering at the girls. It was abruptly ended by a smack upside the head from Remus. The four boys started walking towards them._

_"How far are you willing to go to get him to leave you alone?" Jules said softly as they watched the Marauders approach._

_"Jules, I think you're a very pretty girl," Lily responded. "But I'm really not interested, I'm flattered, but not interested."_

_Jules laughed and shoved Lily in the shoulder a little rougher than intended. "Oh, come off it, I was joking." _

_Lily rubbed her shoulder and adjusted the strap of her bag. As the Marauders got closer, she looked at Jules and said, "I'll meet you in the Common Room later to talk about the- the arrangement." With that she walked away quickly to avoid the scrutiny of James Potter._

_"The arrangement?" James raised his eyebrow. He looked at his sister. "Moving in on my territory, Julie?" He teased. Jules rolled her eyes. Sirius and Peter sniggered together as the twins started walking together._

_"Yeah, clearly, that's why I'm headed to Hogsmeade with Frank this weekend," She said flatly. "Actually, you've got to back off now, because I made a deal with Lily. No teasing her for the rest of the month."_

"Why?" James pestered as he followed her down the hallway. 

_"Because she's going to make sure I don't fail potions," Jules said as a matter-of-fact. She then started into a sprint to avoid his questions of why she was failing questions. James cursed under his breath and then turned to go discuss how the map was coming along with the lads._

* * *

**_Hogwarts Castle, Remus' Office, June 4th, 1994_**

A green flame burst in Remus' office fireplace and then a very ashen Jules pulled herself out. Her eyes were bloodshot. Her skin was a preternatural white. She looked terrifying. She looked murderous. She shook out her hair, and Julianne Potter looked feral.

"How did you-" Remus stared at the woman covered in soot. She had a smear on her cheek, soot on her hands, and tears in her eyes. "You can't be here... I can't-"

"He's alive, Remus," Jules growled. Her voice was low and raspy. "Nothing else matters. He. Is. _Alive._ And he is near my nephew."

Remus watched as Julianne's walls started to crumble. Her eyes betrayed her first as fat tears smeared the soot on her face. Her mouth quivered as she tried to repress terrified sobs that clawed their way out of her constricted throat. Remus stood up from his desk and started to move towards her cautiously, as though he was approaching a coyote with its foot in a trap.

"H-he's alive," Jules gasped for air as she succumbed to the situation. "I sent them here to be s-safe and he's here with them and I just- I can't... I f-failed them... I-" Julianne clapped her hand over her mouth and let the tears fall as she trembled with rage, fear and grief.

"Broke into the most protected castle in the entire Wizarding World," Albus Dumbledore said from the doorway. His bemused smile and twinkling eyes met Remus' horrified expression. "I must say, that is quite impressive... And might I inquire how long this room is without filtering?"

Another burst of green flames emerged from the floor of the fireplace. Sirius Black, coughing and spluttering, rolled onto the floor of his best friend's office. He picked himself up and ran his hand over his face, leaving half of it black. Sirius looked between his old Headmaster, his old fiancée and his best mate. Dumbledore stroked his beard and looked at the framed fugitive.

"Deciding to come here was most unwise, Mr. Black," Dumbledore said pensively.

"Albus," Sirius said. "Peter Pettigrew is in the castle. Harry can prove it." All eyes fell on him. Jules lunged for his throat at the mention of Harry's name, but Remus grabbed her arm and yanked her back. He wrapped his arms tightly around her waist to restrain her. Remus and Sirius exchanged a look. The bars of Julianne's prison had never disappeared. They merely hovered at a distance just long enough to give the illusion of freedom, and just close enough to destroy her.

* * *

**_Godric's Hollow, July 30th, 1980_**

_Jules stood in James and Lily's kitchen making a late night snack for her very pregnant sister-in-law while Sirius and James were out on some Order mission. She did exactly as she was instructed and put the pickles on top of the peanut butter on the slice of bread. She brought a cup of tea with her and placed it in front of Lily on the coffee table. Jules sat across from her in an armchair and twiddled her thumbs._

_Lily started to eat the pickles and peanut butter. She ate it quickly and then downed her mug of tea no questions asked. She rubbed her large belly and looked to her sister-in-law._

_"Thanks for staying here tonight," Lily smiled thoughtfully. Jules smiled back with dark circles clearly visible underneath the lenses of her glasses._

_"Well, so long as you don't have the baby before they get back," Jules teased. Lily started to laugh, and hiccup. Pregnancy had made her incredibly gassy. Lily struggled to stop laughing and calm herself down. The two women sat in silence for a moment and Lily rubbed her belly contemplatively._

_"What's it like?" Julianne asked quietly as she watched Lily smile and rub her ever-expanding belly._

_"Being in hiding? It's awful. I'm stir-crazy all the time, but I'm carrying the one thing the Dark Lord wants. I have to stay inside, while you lot take turns babysitting me. I just want to go for a run, or go on one of those Order missions. Instead, I'm here... I feel so-" Lily sighed and looked down at the large mound that contained a life form._

_"I meant being pregnant," Jules laughed. Lily smiled at herself and then looked up to Jules. _

_"It's an experience, surely," Lily said. "Most of the time you feel awful, but there are these rare moments when you just feel so full of life and love. It's like learning that you're a witch... Only better." _

_Jules sipped her tea and her lips twitched slightly upward at the corners. She looked down at her own flat stomach and imagined what it might be like to be an incubator for just under a year. Lily leaned back and put a pillow under her back to make herself even more comfortable. The baby pressed on all sorts of organs and it made it next to impossible to sit still._

_"You know," Lily smiled to herself. "I still remember the day you nearly ripped my head off and spat down my throat." _

_"We were sixteen! It was the end of fifth year," Jules cringed in search of the words to justify that argument in the common room. Lily had stormed out in tears. James had called Jules a cow and gone to look for Lily. _

_"No, but you were right," Lily said gently. "I mean, the whole argument... It was because of amortentia." _

_"And it still took you another year and a half to finally agree to a walk 'round Hogsmeade," Jules chuckled._

_"Only because your brother, much as we both love him, was a right little-" Lily stopped in her tracks. Her upper thighs felt wet. She felt as though she'd just wet herself. Her eyes widened. "No."_

_"A right little no?" Jules crinkled her eyebrows together. "What do you mean-"_

_Suddenly, Lily leaned over her belly as the sensation of her stomach pressing in on itself made her let out a groan. "Jules, you have to get them home. Right. NOW."_

_Julianne's eyes widened. Her heart started to pound in her chest. She couldn't hear anything, she felt frozen and yet her feet started to move. Jules scrambled around the living room. She sent out three patronuses, one to Madame Pomfrey: the one mediwitch they could all trust, one to Dumbledore and one to James. Lily's first contraction ended and she started to breathe heavily. Jules grabbed blankets and towels. She scrounged up some ice. Lily started moaning in pain again, and Jules dropped what she was holding. She knelt at Lily's side beside the sofa._

_The grandfather clock in the corner struck midnight. Lily started to scream in pain. Jules heart was pounding. The door burst open. Albus Dumbledore and Madame Pomfrey entered. Jules was holding Lily's hand when her second contraction ended. Madame Pomfrey dug around her bag for a soothing draught. _

_"Where's James?" Lily asked breathlessly. _

_"He's on his way," Albus said with his powerful voice filling the space. Jules looked at her sister-in-law and then at Albus. "They're both safe." He added to sooth the worried looks on both women's faces. _

_Hours passed and Lily's contractions got closer together. Madame Pomfrey, Albus and Julianne moved her to the master bedroom. Jules held Lily's hand and cursed her brother for even agreeing to go on the stupid mission this close to Lily's due date. Lily screamed and squeezed Julianne's hand tightly. _

_"Where is he?" Lily whispered through the pain, searching her sister-in-law's eyes for answers that neither of them had. Julianne shook her head. She put on a small smile and pushed the hair out of Lily's forehead._

_"He'll be here soon," Jules assured her. She cast a side glance to Albus who had started to pace up and down the hall outside of the door. Lily screamed again. Julianne's heart felt frozen in her chest. Her brother and her- her Sirius were on some Order mission from Dumbledore. They'd left almost twelve hours ago. Jules looked at Lily, who was in agonizing pain, and had the terrifying thought that maybe it would just be the two of them. The two of them and Peter, maybe Remus, if he wasn't a spy, and a baby. _

_"Lily, I know you're going to want to push," Madame Pomfrey said. "But whatever you do, do not push until I say so, do you understand?" _

_Lily whimpered and clasped onto Julianne's hand. Jules put a cool cloth on her forehead to clean off some of the sweat. She tried to say the most soothing things she thought possible. She said that James would be home soon, but as time passed on, each agonizing second left a colder, darker feeling in her chest that maybe, just maybe they were gone._

_Loud voices could be heard downstairs as a door swung open and slammed close. A set of ootsteps ran up the stairs, and a more disheveled than usual James burst into the room. Jules stood up from her chair at the bedside of her brother's wife and felt as though the weight of the world was lifted off her shoulders._

_"James," Lily said, half-laughing, half-crying. "You bloody arse! You got me into this, were you honestly going to let me do this alone?" _

_James ran over to his wife's side and knelt beside the bed. He grabbed onto her hand and Jules searched for Sirius in the landing outside the door. She didn't see him and her heart started to sink again. _

_"Oh, Lils," James said morosely. "I got here, just in time... I'm so sorry..." Lily smiled at him, before her face contorted into one of pain and she started screaming curses at him. Her grip on Jules' hand loosened as she clasped onto James. Jules got up and excused herself quietly. The room sounded silent, despite the writhing woman and cringing James. Madame Pomfrey shouted something and Jules slowly walked towards the front door. _

_As she stood at the top of the stairs, she saw a nervous Sirius Black pacing back and forth. He had a small cut on his cheek that was slightly swollen and starting to bruise. Jules let out a relieved gasp for air as she saw him run his hands through his hair. He turned to face her. _

_"Hi," He said softly. Sirius watched as she started to leap down the stairs. He moved towards the bottom of the staircase and let his arms envelope her as she threw her arms around his neck. He inhaled the scent of her: lavender and vanilla mixed with the peppermint of her shampoo. Sirius ran his fingers through Jules' hair and let her clutch him tightly._

_"You two gits had me worried for a moment," Jules whispered into his neck. She had meant it as a joke, but it sounded more like a desperate relieving statement. Sirius held her tighter for an instant. _

_"We had me worried for a moment, too," He whispered back. Sirius let himself enjoy how warm she felt against him. He could feel her heart beating against her chest, and every curve of her pressed into him. His breathing calmed down. His muscles relaxed. He enjoyed feeling her fingers wrapped around the hair at the back of his head. Sirius didn't mind if the war was raging, if there was a baby being born upstairs, because all he needed for this moment was holding him close. _

_There was an earsplitting scream that gave way to a baby crying. Slowly but surely Jules and Sirius untwined themselves for one another. Jules placed a gentle kiss on his lips with every intention to turn around and go see the baby. Instead, Sirius pulled her in for a moment longer than she had expected. His fingers dug into her back and he kept her pressed against him, kissing her like he might never see her face again. When he finally pulled away, Jules stared at him open mouthed._

_"What was that for?" She asked breathlessly. Sirius let go of her. He looked her in the eye, and smiled tentatively. _

_"Just because," He said. Jules stared at him uneasily for a moment, and then turned around to head up the stairs. _

_James and Lily lay in bed, side by side. Lily had a tiny, swaddled baby boy in her arms. James was watching the tiny human squirm around in his mother's arms. His heart was so full in that moment he thought it would burst. With tear-filled eyes, he pressed his lips against Lily's temple. Jules watched the family interact from the doorway while Albus and Madame Pomfrey discussed new security measures now that the child was born._

_"I think the best course of action for the next little while," Albus said finally to distract the adults in the room. "Is to get some well-deserved rest. Congratulations on your son." With that, a smile and a signature twinkle in his eye, Albus Dumbledore lead Madame Pomfrey out of the cottage. _

_It was 4:15am on July 31st, 1980. Jules had a nephew. James and Lily had a son. Sirius had an old Potter heirloom in his pocket. _

* * *

**_Albus Dumbledore's Office, Hogwart's Castle, June 4th, 1994_**

Severus Snape was furious. He paced too and fro while Julianne Potter wrung her hands in the chair across from Dumbledore's desk. A big, black dog sat obediently at her feet. Severus turned to face the woman who resembled so much the bane of his existence. He searched her face for some kind of sign.

"Pettigrew is dead," He snapped for the third time into the empty office. "Anyone who says otherwise is delusional, and I certainly wouldn't put insanity past _you._"

The black dog snarled at him as Severus flicked a piece of black hair out of his face. Jules nudged the dog with her leg and then stared back at the man who had so desperately loved her sister-in-law and yet so deeply hurt her.

"Delusion and insanity were not the reason I stayed in Mungo's, Sni-Severus," Jules clenched her jaw. "_You_ of all people should understand exactly why I had my little stay there."

"Or maybe I'm the last person who would understand," Snape growled. "Because I was strong enough to overcome that night, and you succumbed to it."

Jules stood up from her chair and stared across the office, empty for all but them and the dog. She leveled her eyes with his.

"And yet, I never take my grief and resentment out on a teenager," She hissed. Severus' spine stiffened. He stared at the bespectacled woman, with her unruly black hair and her straight, sharp nose. She watched him as he swooped around with his long black robes and started to storm out of the office. "Strut away, Snivey. It doesn't change the fact that she chose James over the whiny boy who called her a you-know-what."

"Enough," Albus' strong and quiet voice pierced through the tension between his former students. "That is enough from both of you. Severus, I happen to believe Julianne."

"Do you believe her _mutt_, too?" Severus nearly yelled as his eyes met the grey eyes of the black dog. "I think she's being manipulated. It's a funny thing what love can do to the brain." Jules swallowed as she clenched and unclenched her fist.

"Severus," Dumbledore said calmly.

"No, please," Jules threw her hands up. "Continue, Severus. Tell me all about the madness that is founded in the heart. Preach to _me_ about how it eats you up, how you can't sleep at night because all you see is his face and their corpses. Tell me! _Tell me!" _

"And yet you still stand here," Severus sneered at her, his lip curling. Dumbledore opened his mouth to cut them off, but Julianne raised her hand. She stood up and started slowly walking towards Severus.

_"No,"_ She said firmly. _"_Go on, Severus... You go on and tell me exactly how I am so easily swayed because I am a woman with her heart invested in someone and her love invested in someone. Go ahead, and I will tell you the same thing I told you eighteen years ago. You are a misogynist who does not respect the choices or actions of women. _She didn't choose you! _You sit there on your high horse and you look down on me for the very same reason that you _crossed sides_," Julianne stood a mere twelve inches away from him. "But don't you dare accuse me of putting Sirius Black before _my_ children. Don't you dare." Her eyes shone with the threat of powerful, unforgivable curses that could flood her tongue and fill the room. Her jaw was set. Her muscles were tense. Her lips curled over her teeth as though she might snap her jaw and rip out a jugular. "I am not here out of loyalty to Sirius, or even out of love for him. I'm here for my children."

"Are you quite finished?" Severus asked as he turned to face Dumbledore with a face set in stone.

"I will not be finished until I have Pettigrew chained to a Great Hall bench while the dementor's kiss him for what he stole from me, from Harry, from _you_," Her eyes met his once more and Severus tilted his chin upward. He took a deep breath and then the two turned to face Albus.

"And because of that," Dumbledore adjusted his half-moon glasses and looked at the frightful woman standing in his office. "We need to find where Mr. Pettigrew might be located."

Julianne turned to look at him before she realized that the dog who had been so loyally at her side had disappeared. Her eyes grew wide and panicked as soon as she reached down to pet the soft fur that had been there earlier. She looked up at Albus with her mouth open, barely able to speak. Sirius had disappeared.

* * *

**_The Potter Cottage, Godric's Hollow, July 31st, 1980_**

_Jules awoke around noon on the pull-out couch in James' living room. She heard the sound of footsteps and whispers. As her eyes opened, she saw her twin brother grinning at his son. He was whispering stories and pacing back and forth with the baby to soothe him. A sleepy smile spread across Julianne's face. She moved to get off of the rather uncomfortable mattress only to have Sirius' arm wrap tightly around her and pull her back down. James paced with the baby up and down the front hallway, ever so often passing the doorway to the living room._

_"Ten more minutes," Sirius grumbled into the pillow. _

_"But I want a turn with baby Harry," Jules said softly as she tried to squirm away from Sirius. _

_"Mmm, but I want a turn with you," Sirius put on his best sultry voice and rolled over on top of Julianne who started to laugh while he planted kisses on her neck. She struggled underneath him, but the sheer weight of him had her pinned._

_"James is right outside," Jules struggled to say between kisses that Sirius was sloppily planting all over her face. _

_"And besides which," James' voice carried from the hallway. "Harry's first scarring sexual experience should be walking in on his real parents, not his godparents." _

_Sirius started to laugh. He rolled off of Jules and stretched himself out and said, "He won't remember, Prongs! You could always just take the lad upstairs while I tak-" James appeared in the doorway with the baby in his arms and an unimpressed scowl on his face. Sirius smiled at his best mate and said, "While I take a moment to get some tea made for his father?" _

_"Nice save, darling," Jules patted him on the chest while she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She took a moment to scoop baby Harry out of James' reluctant arms. She stared down at his squished up face in awe. "Oh, he's just perfect, James..." Jules whispered as she watched the newborn stretch around and then cozy into her arms. _

_"D'you see that baby, Padfoot," James said teasingly. "D'you see the look on Jules' face? She'll start bothering you for one next. Remember, Lily's already married the sane twin."_

_In Jules' arms the baby started to open up his eyes. He gurgled a little and Jules whispered an over-exaggerated hello to her nephew. Sirius walked over to Jules and wrapped an arm around her shoulder to look down at the little tyke. _

_"Hi Harry," Sirius smiled at the baby. "I'm your Uncle Padfoot. I'll be your favourite." _

_"You will not," James and Jules said simultaneously. Sirius laughed and he adjusted the baby's blanket. Harry's big eyes stared up at him. Sirius knew he wouldn't remember being in a room filled with so much love. _

_"Besides," Jules said. "Just because mum and dad referred to you as the lost Potter doesn't mean you're actually his uncle." Sirius grazed the baby's chubby cheek with his finger tip. His other hand reached into his pocket and dug around for a moment. _

_"Well, I love his aunt. I mean, really, we could just get married and then I'd be officially a Potter and officially his uncle," Sirius said while still making faces at Harry. Jules laughed a little, her arms were getting tired and she turned to face Sirius with the baby still in her arms. "That way you won't have to worry about fighting me for custody if anything happens to these gits."_

_"Watch it," James rolled his eyes and chuckled. "Julie, let me have my son back." He walked over and took the baby from his sister just in time for him to start crying._

_"Sirius, you do realize that's not how it works, right?" Jules smiled at him as she stretched out her arms. A sleepy, exhausted looking Lily slowly made her way into the living room and charmed the sofa bed to be put back into the sofa. _

_"How's my boy this morning?" Lily cooed as she leaned against James and looked at their masterpiece. James stared intently at the scene unfolding before him. He whispered something into Lily's ear and a huge smile broke across her face. _

_"Why isn't that how it works?" Sirius pulled his fist out of his pocket and grinned at her._

_"Once I marry you, I'll be Julianne Black," Jules shook her head at him. "Your name doesn't change, love." _

_"_Once_ you marry me," Sirius kept grinning. "So is that a yes?" Jules stared at him and saw his hand start to reach towards her. He was holding her great-grandmother's ring in his hand. The ring her mother used to wear. The ring she thought had been buried with her parents. James and Lily looked at each other and then back at Jules and Sirius. _

_"Only if you ask me properly," Jules said firmly. She then turned around and smiled at Lily. Sirius watched as she walked away, but he didn't miss how she reached her hands behind her back and rubbed her fingers together as though spinning a ring on her left hand's ring finger._

_Baby Harry started to fuss. Lily took him into his arms and smiled at everyone. "I have to feed my son," she said as though feeding her son was her greatest accomplishment. Lily winked at Jules on her way out. Jules bit her lip to stop herself from grinning like an idiot. _

_"So," James started. "Are you planning on asking her properly?" His eyes shifted between the two of them. Jules burst out laughing and shoved her brother._

_"Sod off," She teased as he pulled her into a hug and they began to wrestle like they were children. Sirius was still holding the ring. The twins were so absorbed in their immature fight that no one noticed Sirius get down on one knee until he cleared his throat. _

_"Merlin's beard," Jules whispered as she stared at him and straightened herself out. "You were serious..."_

_"I'm always Sirius," He smirked at her and endured the eye roll before she started to walk towards him. "That's besides the point. I have a question to ask you, and this floor isn't carpeted so my knee is really starting to hurt."_

_"Mate, you don't whine while proposing," James scoffed. "Besides, my bet is you don't even get out her full name before she sa-"_

_"Yes!" Jules interrupted. "Yes, I'll marry you."_

_"What makes you think I was going to ask you that?" Sirius teased as he stood up from the floor. "I was just going to ask if you'd like to help me do the laundry later." He slipped the ring on her finger and pulled her into his arms. "But since you've already said yes..." Sirius leaned down and kissed her. _

_James stood up from his seat. He called up the stairs, "Lily! You owe me two galleons!" _

* * *

**_Hogwarts Castle, June 4th, 1994_**

Remus and Jules sat in his quarters in the castle. He had an arm wrapped around her shoulder. He was tired and weaker than usual, but he wanted nothing more than to be there for his dearest friend. Jules leaned her head on his shoulder while tears fell silently down her cheeks. He rubbed her upper arm with his hand and squeezed her into him like he had on so many nights.

"I always imagined," Jules whispered. "I always imagined that we'd all be here again... You know, once the war ended. I always imagined that we'd celebrate here." Tears clouded her voice. "Why do we never get to celebrate, Remus? Why is it always a fight? Why did he run?"

"I don't know, Julie," Remus said gently. There was a long pause before he jumped up from his seat. Jules stared at him, somewhat alarmed, and watched as he started digging through his belongings before he pulled out a folded up piece of blank parchment.

"You have the map?" Jules said thoughtfully. "I told you Sirius ran away, and the first thing you did was pour me firewhiskey? When you had _the map_?"

Remus looked at her apologetically and then tapped the parchment with his wand. He said the words he'd longed to say for nearly sixteen years since his graduation.

"_I solemnly swear I am up to no good."_

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so this jumped around a bit. I hope it was still alright! Thanks for reading! :)**


	10. Coyote Ugly

**Chapter Ten: Coyote Ugly**

**A/N: This chapter was hard for me to write. My friend who often lets me bounce ideas off of her ended up convincing me how to deal with the whole full moon incident. Hate me, love me... I did my best! Happy reading! :)**

* * *

**_Hogwarts, May 25th, 1976_**

_"I don't understand," Jules said defeatedly. She buried her head in her crossed arms on the table. "I did everything according to the rules! And all I get is grey sludge!" _

_Lily furrowed her brow and inspected the cauldron. There was a spark and then suddenly the liquid that had been dull grey turned into a liquid with a mother-of-pearl sheen. A small smile started to spread across her lips._

_"Jules, look again," She said excitedly. Jules lifted her head up from her arms and pouted at the redhead across from her. "No, really... Look!"_

_Jules peaked her head over the cauldron and a grin danced on her lips. She looked at Lily, who nodded her head._

_"I did it?" Jules said tentatively. "I did it! Oh, Lily! You're the best!" _

_Lily and Jules hugged each other tightly and then turned back to the cauldron. They exchanged glances in the empty class and sat in silence for a moment._

_"Should we- should we smell it?" Jules asked. "I mean, it's supposed to smell like what we love... So maybe we should..."_

_"Oh, we definitely should," Lily grinned at her newfound friend. They poured a little bit into a flask and put a stopper in it. After cleaning up the mess that they had made after several failed attempts of trying to brew amortentia, Lily and Julianne headed back to the Gryffindor Common Room._

_James and Peter were sitting around with Alice Prewett and Mary McDonald. They were all studying for the Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L. James and Peter were tossing a crumpled up piece of parchment between them to try to distract Remus. They were so entrenched in whatever was occupying them that when Jules and Lily very loudly walked in and started to giggle at a joke they had made, everyone's heads snapped up to glare at them from the sofas._

_"I'm not sure I like them being friends," James whispered to Peter. Peter chuckled and shrugged his shoulders to show his indifference. _

_"I'm not sure I like it either," Alice said quietly as she watched Lily and Jules start to whisper things to one another. "It feels like the balance of things has been put off... An Evans-Potter alliance can only mean bad things." _

_Mary laughed at her friend and looked at the redhead and brunette across the way from her. _

_She smiled smugly, "I think we should all be friends with only one Potter twin. Preferably the one who knows how to hit bludgers." Mary winked at James who rolled his eyes at the girl and then turned his attention to Peter._

_"D'you know where Sirius has gotten off to?" He asked. Peter shook his head. Things had gotten dull again. James sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He turned and opened his mouth to say something._

_"Not a chance, Potter," Lily called out before he could even ask. _

_"But I haven't even asked anything yet..." James moaned. His bottom lip jutted out and he tried to do the puppy-dog look that Sirius had pulled off so well. _

_"You were going to," Jules laughed as she watched her dejected brother continue studying after he stuck his tongue out at his twin. _

_"He really hates us as friends," Lily giggled as the two headed up to the girls' dormitory together. _

_Once they were seated on Jules' four poster bed, they opened up the tiny flask of Amortentia they'd snuck out of the classroom. Jules sniffed it first. _

_"Mmm," Jules hummed to herself as the scent surrounded her head and clouded her thoughts. Lily anxiously awaited Jules' description of the scent. "It's like... Broom polish, my mum's sandalwood salve and the quidditch pitch after rain." _

_"I'm not sure if you described anyone there," Lily said disappointedly. Jules shrugged and passed her the flask. As Lily inhaled, she blinked a few times and inhaled again to make sure she'd just smelled correctly. She crinkled her nose and pushed her eyebrows together. _

_"For me, it smells like you... Only if you stopped using that vanilla perfume and started bathing in autumn leaves and crushed pine needles..." Lily chewed the inside of her cheek. _

_"It smells like James," Jules shrugged her shoulders and put the stopper on the potion before she realized what she'd said. "Good Godric, Lily! It smells like _James_!" Jules gasped once the truth had set in. _

_"You must have done something wrong," Lily said quickly as she stood up from the bed. "Maybe it was only good for one go. You mixed up ingredients. It was a weird colour before I looked at it."_

_"I can't believe it," Jules shook her head. "I can't bloody well believe it, it smells like James!" _

_"Well, yours smells like Sirius Black, so there!" Lily snapped. "I don't even remotely like your bumbling berk of a brother! He's cruel and cold-hearted. It's a fluke! You're lousy at potions anyway."_

_"It does not smell like Sirius! And don't talk about James that way," Jules leapt from the bed and clenched her fists at her side. "He defended you! You've been nothing but awful to him-"_

_"He picked on my best friend," Lily's voice began to raise. "He picked on him mercilessly. And then he expected me to go on a date with him? He's disgusting! He's a sleazy, greasy slimeball!"_

_"You're not perfect either, Miss Slug Club," Jules started to raise her voice. "Yeah, James was a right git to Snivi-Severus, but Severus is... He's not a nice lad either! And his hair is far greasier than Jamie's! James would never, ever call you a... A you know what! Your 'best friend' did! So how's that for personality traits?"_

_"At least I'm not related to someone who picks on people weaker than him!" Lily spat back. The two stood on opposite sides of the bed. They glared at each other. The gloves were off. The truce was over. "At least I'm not going to fail my O.W.L.s because I've cut potions classes to fool around with Frank Longbottom!" _

_Lily stormed down the stairs and Jules followed. Lily's green eyes had flints of rage just waiting to spark inside of them. Jules' hazel eyes were already ignited._

_"At least I'm not friends with Death Eaters," Jules screamed across the common room. _

_"At least I'm not friends with a bunch of arrogant, marauding gits!" Lily snapped back. _

_"Hey!" Jules stormed over to the redhead and stared her in the eye. She stood inches from her and said, "They are truly arrogant, truly awful, absolutely marauding gits. I agree with you. But they are _MY_ truly awful gits. Do you understand me, Evans? Don't you ever, ever talk about my brother or my friends that way again." _

_"Or what?" Lily hissed through clenched teeth._

_"Or I'll tell everyone exactly what your amortentia smells like," Jules smirked at Lily. Lily huffed and turned on her heel. She stormed out of the common room._

_"So that's a no to Hogsmeade next weekend, then, Evans?" James called after her. Jules cuffed her brother upside of the head, and sat down next to him on the sofa. _

_"So I take it that means the Evans-Potter union is off," Mary teased from the arm chair. "That lasted all of five minutes."_

_"Shut up, Mary," Jules shook her head and laughed at her friend. Just then the Fat Lady's portrait swung open and Sirius walked in looking rather proud of himself. He strutted over to his mates and jumped up on the back of the sofa._

_"I just sent our dear friend Snivey on a mission tonight," Sirius grinned lopsidedly. He ruffled Jules' hair with one hand and James' with the other as he swung his legs in between the two of them._

_Julianne and James leapt from their seats when they heard what Sirius had done. As Sirius gauged their reaction, he realized his wrong doings and a sinking feeling filled his stomach like concrete. Sirius watched open mouthed as the twins ran from the common room. It was getting dark quickly._

_"Jules, it's too dangerous," James called back to her. "You should stay back, or get Dumbledore or something!"_

_"To hell with that," She responded. "You need all the help you can get when it comes to Remus' furry little problem!" _

_Sirius chased after them, but was a few paces behind. He kept repeating the things he had told Severus in his head. Each time he imagined the conversation and the tip off of how to immobilize the Whomping Willow he cringed. He was so stupid. _

_As soon as they were out of the castle, a howl could be heard. James' heart started pounding. He sprinted towards the Shrieking Shack where he saw Severus descend into the Shrieking Shack. Jules chased after her brother, but one of her shoes flew off and she tripped. She pulled herself up and started to run through the grounds in her socks. The grass was damp and her feet slipped and slid everywhere as she tried to catch up to James. _

_Jules watched as James followed Severus into the Shack. She inadvertently screamed his name out of the sheer terror. Jules started to run toward the tree without a second thought. Her wand was out, at the ready. As she approached the tree, the immobilus charm started to wear off. A panicked Julianne tried to avoid the branches that started to swing down around her. A branch knocked her square on her back and her wand flew away from her. She scrambled over to get it, before another branch lifted her up and tossed her towards the rocky shore of the Black Lake. Her glasses cracked and she felt something warm and sticky dripping from her temple before the world went dark. _

* * *

**_Hogwarts Castle,_** **_June 5th, 1994_**

"Lucy, you're not coming with," Harry said firmly as the eleven year old stood in front of the exit of the Gryffindor Common Room. She crossed her arm and set her jaw. Her grey eyes challenged the thirteen year olds' authority over her and she had never looked more like her mother.

"I am too," Lucy retorted. "When you were eleven, you used to sneak around the castle _alone_ with the cloak. I'll be with you three. What's the worst that could happen?"

"Let's see," Ron started. "Well, there was the Mountain Troll and Fluffy in first year, then the demented Wizard's Chess board, also first year... Oh, my personal favourite, giant killer spiders last year, and lest we forget the-"

"Chamber of Secrets," Lucy placed her hands on her hips. "I know. I've heard all the stories. It's not _fair_! You get to have all the adventures."

"Adventures?" Harry said loudly. "We could have died! I nearly did. Besides, your mum said that Snuffles is still running away from them, so it's not safe."

"Snuffles would never hurt anyone," Lucy shrugged as though it were a mere coincidence that the man accused of murder couldn't be found despite his professed innocence. "I'm coming with. It's just to Hagrid's hut. We'll leave before the- the execution. I'll be fine."

"Lucy," Hermione said gently. "Once you're under the cloak, you can't scream or make any noise. You have to be totally silent. Are you absolutely certain you can do that?"

"Yes," Lucy said without hesitation. A huge grin spread across her face as Hermione turned to the two boys. Harry threw up his arms in defeat and Ron huffed. They all hid under the invisibility cloak and headed out of the common room, out of the castle.

As they crossed the grounds, they found that sneaking four people under the cloak was increasingly difficult. Feet were stepped on every second step. It took everything for them to not trip over one another.

"If your mum ever knew," Harry muttered under his breath after Lucy stepped on his foot for the fourth time.

"How come she's only my mum when she's getting you in trouble, but she's your aunt when she tells you stories about her and your dad at Hogwarts," Lucy hissed back. Hermione and Ron shushed the both of them, and the group continued onwards to Hagrid's hut.

At the hut, Hagrid opened the door and the half-giant's hands shook as the four students entered his cabin. They offered their condolences and each hugged him as they entered.

"You shouldn't've come 'ere," Hagrid said gruffly as they all sat down in the same armchair: Hermione and Lucy squeezed onto the seat, Harry and Ron sat perched on either arm.

"We had to see you," Lucy started to explain. Harry's head shot around and he glared at her as if to tell her that speaking was not an option. She very valiantly stuck her tongue out at her older cousin and continued on anyway. "You shouldn't be alone today. Losing people is hard, so losing a hippogriff... I can't even imagine."

Hermione couldn't help but smile at Lucy's innocence as she stared up at Hagrid. She reached into her pocket and offered him a handkerchief as gigantic tears started rolling down Hagrid's cheeks at the kind words.

Hagrid started to put on the kettle over the fire, and as he reached for a teapot, he knocked over the milk jug. It smashed on the floor and Hagrid knelt down to shakily pick up the pieces.

Hermione picked up a new milk jug from a shelf and screamed as she saw Scabbers, Ron's supposedly dead rat, inside.

"What is it?" Ron asked as they had all jumped from their seats.

"I apologized," Hermione started to laugh. "I apologized, but Crookshanks didn't kill him!"

Hermione pulled out the flailing, squeaking rat and handed it to her now sheepish redheaded friend. Ron took the rat and pet his little, balding head. He mumbled something that sounded vaguely like an apology before he was cut off by Lucy staring out the window.

"Oh no," She said softly. "Dumbledore is coming..." Lucy turned to look at her cousin's emerald eyes. Harry got up from where he was standing. He reached for the invisibility cloak. Ron clutched Scabbers tightly so he didn't escape and the four of them hid back under the cloak after saying their goodbyes hastily to Hagrid. Sneaking out the back door, the four tried as best they could to make their way back to the castle.

The sun was starting to lower in the horizon as the group of them walked as far from the Whomping Willow as possible. There was the sharp thud of an axe against something in the background making everyone flinch. Just as they passed the great abusive tree, Scabbers bit down on Ron's hand and jumped out of his grasp.

"Scabbers!" Ron yelled as he chased after the creature. Hermione, Harry and Lucy all exchanged looks before they chased after him towards the Whomping Willow and abandoned the invisibility cloak behind them.

Ron had nearly caught up to his rat. He reached his arm down to pick him up when a big, black dog dove at his arm and started pulling him, and the rat, down beneath the roots. Ron let out a terrified wail.

"RON!" Harry and Hermione screamed. They started to run after him, when the tree came to life. The branches started to beat down around them. Lucy caught movement out of the side of her eye and turned to see what it was. After acknowledging Crookshanks, Hermione's cat, a branch slammed down centimeters from her back. Lucy jumped in her skin. She stared at the tree. Another branch lifted and threatened to come down on her. Harry noticed and dove at the girl. He tackled her to the ground and pushed her towards the roots for shelter.

"I _knew _I shouldn't have let you come," Harry huffed as he watched Lucy slide down to where the dog had been. Just as the branches started to move faster, a familiar mangy cat made its way through the branches and up the trunk. Crookshanks pushed his paw on a hidden knot on the tree and all of the branches adjusted back to a normal tree.

"Crookshanks," Hermione sighed with relief. "Good kitty! Such a smart kitty.." She cooed. Harry hurried her along and down below the tree, into the Shrieking Shack. Harry and Hermione walked along the creaky floorboards and heard Ron sobbing and Lucy yelling at someone. In the dust, they noticed the pawprints turn into footprints. Harry cursed under his breath.

"_YOU PROMISED!"_ Lucy yelled with her wand held out to the man she had spent Christmas with. Her hand shook and she stood defensively in front of Ron and his pet rat.

"Lucy, darling," Sirius held out his hands to try and approach her. "I promise, I promise, love, I have kept my promise. I am an innocent man..."

"Don't. Call. Me. Darling," Lucy shivered as though the very concept of being referred to lovingly by this man disgusted her. Sirius flinched at the tone in her voice that was so very familiar and so very painful.

"How does he _know_ you?" Ron moaned from his position in the corner with Scabbers cowering on his shoulder. Lucy's eyes stung with tears. She stared at the man who had given her mother enough reason to cry with just a photograph and a few pieces of parchment. She looked at the man that had hidden under her bed for weeks as a dog, as a pet she thought she could trust. She felt betrayed. She felt betrayed by the sheer violent force he had used against Ron.

"Because," Lucy said with an animosity in her voice that Ron thought was strange for a girl of eleven. "He's my father."

* * *

**_Remus Lupin's Office, June 6th, 1994_**

Jules walked into the now empty office with her hair a mess. Her eyes had dark circles under them. She'd been wandering through the Forbidden Forest in search of Sirius Black all night. She'd seen him on the Map hiding out by Hagrid's Cabin, but he'd heard her coming and made a run for it. Jules was angry in a deep, dangerous way. Her legs nearly collapsed into Remus' empty chair. She saw the blank piece of paper on his desk and through her exhaustion tapped it with her wand.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," Jules smiled to herself as she remembered the days of writing this map. The sleepless nights in the Potter living room with tea, chocolate frogs and Every Flavoured beans that accumulated in this ingenius masterpiece before her. The blueprints to the castle unfolded before her. She thought she misread the names in the Shrieking Shack.

_Severus Snape, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, Petter Pettigrew, Ron Weasley, Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Lucy Potter._

Her head was spinning. Her legs forced themselves out of the chair. Her muscles tensed and she tapped the parchment in front of her again. "Mischief Managed."

She stumbled over her feet, forced herself to run out of the castle and towards the Shrieking Shack with all the strength she had left. Her head pounded, but she wasn't sure if it was blood, adrenaline or panic. Her world was spinning and she hadn't the faintest idea of whether or not it was exhaustion or the fact that the sole reason for her being back in the castle had come to fruition.

* * *

**_The Shrieking Shack_**

Harry shoved Lucy behind him and stood beside Hermione with his wand out. His skin burned with the sensation of rage. Every inch of him wanted to rip the throat out of Remus Lupin. Remus had lied to him for years, to Lucy and probably his mother for years about being a werewolf. Here he dared side with Sirius when Sirius was clearly insane. Harry wanted to kill. He could hear Lucy stifling her sobs behind him as she clutched to his shirt in terror.

"Ron," Remus said gently. "Give me Peter." His hands outreached and Harry adjusted himself to shield Lucy from him. Remus visibly flinched at the defensive action of the boy he'd helped look after every weekend.

"He's just a rat," Ron squirmed around in agony from his broken ankle. "He's just a rat without a toe and-"

"Because Peter cut it off," Sirius growled. "The coward cut off his toe to frame me!"

Hermione pulled Lucy to her and hugged the girl to her chest. She whispered the only comforting things she could think of, and all of them involved dementors, which frankly didn't comfort Hermione at all. Lucy's wand hadn't dropped from her hand.

"I saw Pettigrew accompanying you four back to the castle," Remus explained. "On the Marauder's Map."

"He wasn't there!" Hermione insisted. "It was just us, just us! We found Scabbers, and we headed back to the castle."

Remus and Sirius started to laugh. They rolled their eyes at the young girl in front of them. Remus smiled kindly at her. Hermione's stomach churned. She'd never been so insulted as to have a teacher laugh openly in her face. Hermione always answered correctly. _Always._

"Peter Pettigrew was- _is_ an animagus. He's a rat," Remus elaborated. He pointed his wand to the rat on Ron's shoulder. "He's _that_ rat."

Lucy straightened her back up. She turned away from Hermione and pushed her way in front of Harry. She pointed her wand at the man she'd loved like a father and stared at him with a morose expression that weighed the corners of her usually upturned lips downward. Her grey eyes searched his amber eyes for some sort of explanation as he pointed his wand at her cousin's best friend.

"Uncle Moony," Lucy pleaded with him. "You're a better man than this..."

"Lucy, get back," Harry hissed as he reached for his younger cousin. As Lucy took another step forward towards the werewolf and the fugitive, she felt two hands pull her back as there was an audible _swoosh_ that filled the air. Behind her, Severus Snape wrapped his arms around the girl's shoulders. His grasp was not protective, it was threatening, and Lucy screamed as she fought against him.

"Well, well," Severus sneered as he restrained the struggling first year in his grasp. He held his wand out to Remus and Sirius. "I knew not to trust Julianne Potter's mutts... I could _kill_ you both right now." He accented the plurality of the word 'mutt' as he glowered over his coworker and the man that had tortured him throughout his days at Hogwarts.

A snarl sounded behind him and a dark grey creature, that had hazel eyes Remus would be a fool not to recognize, lunged at the Potions Master. The body resembled that of a lithe wolf, and the snout was long and narrow. The creature's ears were both black as Harry's hair. Hermione tilted her head to the side as she watched the creature grip Severus Snape's robes with its jaw. She recognized it as something she'd seen on the muggle television when she was a child. Standing in the shrieking shack, attacking Severus Snape was a coyote.

Severus let go of the Potter girl and she scrambled over to Harry. Everyone stood in a sticky silence as the coyote finally released Severus Snape. He lifted his wand at the creature and his lip curled over his teeth. A sharp inhalation was drawn universally as the coyote began to stand on two legs and revealed a most unimpressed Julianne Potter standing at the end of Severus' wand. The transfiguration startled Severus to the point of his wand collapsing on the floor. Jules kicked it away from him in one fell swoop and Sirius picked it up from beside her.

"If you so much as lay a hand on my daughter again," Julianne snarled at the man as her coyote fangs retracted. "I'll rip out your throat." With a flick of her wand, she tied up Severus Snape to the nearest support beam and gagged his mouth with a second flick.

"So, Julie," Sirius whispered in her ear as pointed Severus' wand back at the man himself. "As it happens, I'm not the only one who kept secrets throughout our relationship..."

Without hesitating, Julianne spun on her heel and threw her fist into Sirius' face with as much force as she could muster. He reeled backward and clutched at his now bloodied nose.

"Poor choice of words, mate," Remus said while rubbing his forehead.

Hermione pressed her fingers against her temples and tried to assess the situation. She had no idea which side to be on, if there were any sides. She thought perhaps the only potentially responsible people were all barking mad.

"Harry, love," Jules shook out her fist as she turned to her nephew. "Be a dear, and hand me that bloody rat." Lucy's eyes stared with disbelief at her mother. Her mother could turn into a coyote. Her mother could tie up the Potions Master without hesitating. Her mother could throw a punch.

Harry stared at the woman in front of him in a new light. His eyes flickered between Remus, Sirius, Sirius' bloody nose, and his aunt. Her hair flowed around her shoulders like a mad woman. Her hand trembled as she reached towards Harry and stepped forward. Ron finally spoke.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake!" He yelled. "If even she says the rat's a bloody human, what is the worst that could happen at _this_ point? He's an animagi, she's an animagi, he's a bloody werewolf, I _don't care_ anymore! Take the damn rat!" Ron handed the rat to Harry and egged him on with his hand.

Scabbers bit down on Harry's thumb and drew blood. With a squeak the creature started to run around the room. Jules pointed her wand at the rat and all of the students in the room gasped in horror as the rat attempting to jump through the wall turned into a rather robust Peter Pettigrew with long, deranged nails, nine fingers and a hideous gnarled mullet beneath a balding head.

Jules and Remus pulled him out of the wall and threw him back against the opposite wall. The man started to laugh nervously as he opened his arms as though to embrace the two. Julianne pushed her forearm against his throat and held her wand against his right temple.

"Julie," Peter said with a false smile. "You have quite the animagus form." Jules pulled him back and shoved him harder against the wood with a ruthlessness that neither Harry nor Lucy had ever seen in her before. Peter squealed in pain as he adjusted himself beneath her grip.

"I should kill you," Julianne growled. Sirius wiped the blood from his face and reached his hand out to pull her off. Remus reached instead for his wand. He pointed it at Peter's head while Sirius pressed Severus Snape's wand to Peter's neck.

"We should all kill you," Remus repeated Julianne's words. The three adults exchanged glances and prepared for it.

"Please," Peter whimpered. "Please, I was your friend! I was-"

"You betrayed James and Lily!" Sirius called out as Julianne's grip slackened slightly. "You were their friend! You sent me to Azkaban, stole my life from me!" He wiped the blood that was only starting to slow from his nose now. "Do you see those children?" Sirius pointed to Harry and Lucy behind him. "Do you?"

"They grew up without their fathers, both of them, because of you," Sirius growled as he used the hands covered with his own blood to wrap around Peter's neck.

Peter nodded as tears of fear filled his watery blue eyes. Julianne let go of him and let Sirius take over as she too turned her attention to the terrified youths behind her. Lucy ran over first and threw her arms around Julianne's waist. Reluctantly, Harry also wrapped his arms around her. Julianne lowered herself and held them both in her arms. She kissed the tops of both of their heads and then turned towards Ron who, along with Hermione, were staring opened mouthed at the drama unfolding before them.

"It's time for me to commit the murder I was imprisoned for," Sirius snarled as he tightened his grip around Peter's neck. Harry pushed his aunt off of him at those words as he was hit with a realization.

"Wait," Harry called out making Sirius' spine stiffen. He turned to face his godson who looked identical to his best friend. "Don't kill him... _Use him_."

"Harry," Julianne said quietly. "That is the man responsible for the death of your parents... All those birthdays you wished for them to come back, _that_ is the reason they didn't, the reason they couldn't!"

Harry turned to face his aunt's desperate eyes and quivering lower lip. He recognized her proximity to complete emotional collapse. He recognized the fragility of the entire situation around him. He shook his head at the woman who, while being fully grown and having looked after him every weekend of his life, resembled a terrified child.

"Aunt Jules," Harry shook his head at her. "You can't kill him. If you kill him, Sirius will be executed. He'll be killed. You'll never see him again."

"Harry, this isn-" Remus started to cut him off.

"No, don't tell me that he has nothing to do with this," Harry cut him off. "Listen, both of you, regardless of whether you want to admit it, _you_," Harry looked at his aunt. "You love him. I know you do. You both do. He's your best mate," He paused and looked at Lucy who had slowly unwrapped her arms from around her mother's waist. Harry looked back to Jules. "He's Lucy's dad. He's my godfather. What would my dad have wanted?"

Deafening silence made each creak of the Shrieking Shack more and more apparent. Remus and Jules stared at each other with pained expressions. There was only one other option. Sirius' grip on Peter Pettigrew loosened from around his neck. He stared at the man for a moment before he walked over to Ron and silently started to help the boy up onto his good foot while apologizing for his brutish behavior earlier. Harry rushed to his other side.

"Your aunt told me that your mother's sister still has full custody over you," Sirius said to Harry from Ron's right side.

"Yeah," Harry said solemnly. "It's not her fault... It's just that every time Jules applies they pull out her Mungo's records and I'm guessing the fact that she lived with a werewolf for seven years doesn't help either. Not that I knew about that... Or you, really before this year."

"Yes, well," Sirius chuckled. "Once I'm free, I'll pull the martyr card and you can live with us permanently."

"Us?" Harry's eyes brightened at the idea. "You're going to move in with Jules?" There was a pause as Sirius opened his mouth as though to make an amendment. "Oh, you haven't told her yet."

"Can I make a suggestion," Ron said sardonically. "Maybe mention it to her first... She only just decked you a moment ago, mate, and her animagus is a little bit tougher than yours."

The three of them laughed a lot harder than they knew they should have as they walked out of the ramshackle building.

Just as Julianne thought Peter might start running away, she tied him up and attached him to Remus. Remus walked him towards the exit. Lucy and Hermione stuck side by side as they watched Julianne untie Severus Snape.

"You could go to prison for aiding and abetting a fugitive," He spat. Julianne sucked back on her teeth and narrowed her eyes as she stared at him long and hard.

"I could," She said quietly. "And you could have for being a _you-know-what_ during the First Wizarding War. But hey, Dumbledore forgave you and you're not paying him to educate two of your children..." She grabbed him firmly by the arm and walked him out. "Severus, I'll kindly remind you that James saved your life in this very building once."

"I'll kindly remind you that the only reasons he had to are currently escorting an injured student and the reason Lily is dead," Severus snapped back.

"Well, then we both have something invested in the safe return of Peter Pettigrew to Albus Dumbledore," She hissed. Severus' clenched jaw and bruised ego was enough of an answer for Jules. She untied his hands but kept her grip on his arm until they were all out of the Shrieking Shack.

It was dark once the nine of them exited the awful building. A cold realization traveled up Julianne's spine as she saw the clouds clearing in the sky across the lake. The full moon shone in her eyes. Severus' breath caught in his throat as his head snapped around to look at the lycanthrope in their presence.

Jules watched as Remus sunk to his knees and foolishly let go of Peter. A terrible snarling noise erupted from the back of Remus' throat as his neck started to elongate and his shoulders arced back before hunching forward. She ran to his side and started pleading with him to remember who he was.

Jules stumbled backward as the transformation completed. The werewolf sniffed the air and let out a sickening howl that resonated deep in her gut. She looked at the children, Sirius and Snape, who had jumped in front of Lucy and Hermione.

"RUN!" She screamed. The first to listen was Peter Pettigrew.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I decided to rewrite this chapter and rename the fic after some contemplation. I'm never happy. Anyway, here's the one that I'm keeping up here. I hope you all like it. This'll be continued. Don't worry.**

**Reviews are more than welcome!**


	11. Still

**Chapter 11: Still**

**A/N: I've been on a roll in terms of churning out chapters. Woo. Enjoy! This chapter's song inspiration is found in Still by Daughter! **

* * *

_It's spiralling down_

_Biting words like a wolf howling_

* * *

**_Hogwarts, June 5th, 1994_**

Chaos ensued following Remus' transformation. Lucy could barely follow the movement as she watched her normally calm and collected Potions professor dive for a rat in the darkness. She saw her mother transform back into the grey coyote and run circles around the werewolf that was her uncle while yipping and snarling at the creature. Sirius changed back into his animagus, too, and Lucy ran to support Ron as Harry and Hermione chased the three dog-like creatures into the forbidden forest.

By the time she was left standing with the Potions master, the rat and the Weasley with the broken leg, she had no idea what to say as Minerva McGonnagal came running across the grounds shouting, "What is the meaning of this?"

All that Lucy knew was when Severus Snape dared stare Minerva in the eye and put the rat on the ground, she knew she had to stop the rat from running away. She dove onto the creature and held it as tightly as she could.

"Professor," Lucy pleaded. "It's Peter Pettigrew! He's alive!" She held the rat out to the Transfiguration Professor with tears in her eyes. McGonnagal looked over to Severus Snape for verification, and Lucy felt gutted as she heard his response.

"The girl is delusional," Severus said. "It's a rat that her mother found. There's no proof. But what can you expect? The spawn of a murderer and a psychopath."

"No!" Lucy yelled at the man. "Liar!" Her tears of rage flooded her eyes and overflowed down her cheeks. She turned back to her professor. "Do the anti-transfiguration spell! Please! Make him turn back human!"

McGonnagal stared at the girl with her jaw on the floor, not sure if she should indulge the tragic delusions of a child, until Albus Dumbledore arrived moments later. The rat squirmed in her arms and bit its teeth down into her hands. Lucy reflexively wanted to throw the rat away, but something in her made her clench down tighter until Pettigrew had no choice but to reveal himself. Instead, the rat bit its teeth deeper into her hand making her call out in pain.

"Professor Dumbledore, you are the kindest, bravest, most powerful wizard of my time," Lucy's voice shook as she addressed the man in front of her with his half-moon glasses and twinkling periwinkle eyes. "You have a chance to save my father's life... _Please. _I haven't gotten to know him because of this man, please... Do the spell my mum did to make him turn back into a human... Please."

"She's delusional, Albus," Severus said sternly. "In terms of mental stability, she inherits that from both sides."

Just to see, Dumbledore lifted his wand hesitantly and swished it. In an instant, Peter Pettigrew appeared before him. McGonnagal audibly inhaled. Lucy did the only thing she was certain she could.

"_Petrificus totalus!"_ She said as she watched Peter's body freeze up before he could run. With shaking hands, she stepped in front of the petrified criminal. She looked at her headmaster and said, "that man is the man that framed my father. And my opinion might not matter because both of my parents are certifiably mentally unstable because of what your incompetence has done to them, but how much more proof do you need that my father didn't kill him?"

"How dare you speak to the headmaster that way," Severus Snape stepped forward, but Albus merely lifted his hand.

"Twenty points... _to_ Gryffindor," Albus smiled. "Miss Potter, would you kindly escort me to the Hospital wing with Mr. Weasley? Professors, I'll hope you see to it that this man is locked away in the West Tower."

* * *

**_The Forbidden Forest, June 5th, 1994_**

Julianne's legs ached as she beat her way through overgrowth. As she transformed back into herself, she scratched her cheek on a tree branch and pulled leaves out of her unruly hair. Sirius had pulled Remus' attention away after she had bungled her footing on a root and twisted her right angle. She tried not to think about the dull ache developing with each step.

"HARRY!" She called out with her voice growing hoarse from all the screaming she'd done. "Harr-Fuck!" Jules cursed as her ankle collapsed underneath of her and she rolled down a muddy hill onto smooth rocks of a hidden lakeshore in the forest. As she pulled her beaten body back up, she saw the crumpled figure of Sirius Black underneath a steep fall.

"Sirius!" Jules started to run again, ignoring the stabbing pain in her ankle. She approached his side and rolled him onto his back, seeing a large gash on his side from the sharper rocks exposed by erosion. She tore off her muddied sweater.

"Julie," Sirius' bleary eyes met hers. Her eyes started filling with tears as he grinned at her. "Julie, love, as much as I'd l-love to see you topless, I'm- I'm not really in the mood..." He started to cough and a bit of blood came up and stained his lips. Jules started to breathe even heavier as she pressed her sweater into his side while she knelt beside him in her camisole. Sirius moaned with pain as she tried to pull him up into her lap, but she didn't stop what she was doing. Jules wrapped her arms around him, trying to get him in a better position.

"You bastard," Jules said with her voice trembled. "Don't you dare die on me, don't you dare. Not when I'm still cross at you for running out of Dumbledore's office and that tasteless joke... And... Don't you dare..." She held his body in her arms and his pained smile never left his face. "You can't die..." Fat tears rolled down her cheeks and onto his face.

"Darling, don't be cross," He whispered up at her. Jules stared down at his weathered face from the years in Azkaban. She stroked the sides of his face and let herself sob a little as he let his arm drop to his side.

"You can't die," She sobbed. "I love you..." Sirius laughed and fell into a coughing spell.

"You stubborn git," He said as he struggled for air. "I know you do." Julianne pressed her sweater into his side and smiled through her tears at this man that had made her life both miserable and whole in one fell swoop.

"Harry!" Jules heard Hermione's voice in the distance. "I see them! They're over here!" Julianne never took her eyes off of Sirius for a moment. Harry arrived at her side and added his sweater to Jules' on Sirius' chest. He stared down at his godfather who smiled up at him.

"Just like James," Sirius coughed. "Except for the eyes... You have your mother's eyes."

Harry looked up at his aunt and started to say something about escaping, getting him out of the forest, but he lost his train of thought as his breath started to come out in a silvery mist.

"Dementors," Hermione whispered as she lifted her head to see that at least a hundred dementors had surrounded them. Jules lifted a shaky hand and tried to cast a patronus charm as they lunged forward to suck away what little joy she had left. After Julianne's patronus failed to produce more than a silver shield for a few seconds, two dementors leaned in and started to suck out the memories of Lucy's first steps, Harry's fourth birthday. All that was left was the cold, dead corpse of her twin lying on the staircase. All she could see was Hagrid flying off on Sirius' motorcycle.

The world went black.

* * *

**_Hospital Wing, Hogwarts, May 26th, 1976_**

_Jules crinkled her nose as Madame Pomfrey insisted she drink the foul smelling potion to help heal her concussion. Outside of the hospital wing, she heard James and Sirius arguing. There were flowers on her bedside table from Frank. On the bed opposite her, she saw Severus Snape laying down. He had a broken leg, according to Madame Pomfrey, but nothing fatal. _

_"I'm done defending you," James yelled. "He could have died for your idea of a funny prank."_

_"Prongs, I've told you that I'm sorry! I don't know what else I can do, I'm-" Sirius pleaded with his best friend, the boy he thought of as his brother._

_"Sorry, I know!" James snapped. "Sirius, this is exhausting. He could have died." _

_"He could have died," Sirius repeated solemnly. "I didn't reali-"_

_"I don't care," James said softly. "I don't, Sirius. It's over now." James turned on his heel and entered the hospital wing. He saw Jules sitting upright and smiled at her as he walked towards her cot. He sat on the edge of the bed and grinned at Madame Pomfrey._

_"So when can I go?" Jules asked. James awaited the response and squeezed his twin's hand. _

_"I'd like to keep you another night for observation," Madame Pomfrey said. "You're still a bit bruised and concussions are tricky creatures of the brain." Jules nodded and leaned back on the bed. She'd been brought in by Sirius and James the night before. Luckily, breaks and bruises were relatively easy to heal. Luckily, no one had been bitten or scratched by Remus. _

_"How are you feeling?" James asked once Madame Pomfrey had walked away. _

_"Sort of like I dueled a tree, and the tree won," Jules grinned at her twin. James laughed and the pair of them yammered away for a moment until James had to run off to class. He kissed his twin on the forehead and left her sitting across from Severus who had his leg elevated. Jules opened her mouth to say something kind to the boy, but the scowl on his face as he noticed her made her second guess that as a potential option._

* * *

**_Hospital Wing, Hogwarts, June 5th, 1994_**

As Sirius opened his eyes, he half-expected to be back in his Azkaban cell, or to be greeted by James and Lily as though Hogwarts was where all dead witches and wizards came to be happy and free. He looked around him and saw a curtained off area, stone ceilings and stone floors. The curtains flew open and Julianne appeared in front of him looking as untamed as her animagus. She had bloodshot eyes with dark circles underneath of them.

"Blimey, Jules," Sirius said with a smug smile on his face. "You'd think you're the one with 12 years of Azkaban under your belt." She crossed to the bed and crawled delicately onto the bed beside him.

"I saw James," Jules whispered as she leaned her head on her chest and placed her hand on his neck. Sirius tilted his neck to the side and leaned his face against her hair. His hand found the small of her back and stayed there. It was the closest to home that Sirius had felt in the longest time. He had no idea what to say to her revelation, only that he couldn't mention the death of her brother. Not this moment. Together they lay in silence until Lucy showed up nervously in the doorway. Julianne started to sit up, but instead, Lucy did something that Sirius had never expected. She crossed to his other side and lay down on the opposite side of him as her mother. Her grey eyes met his as she curled onto her side into his chest. Julianne slowly lowered herself back down and observed her daughter as she gently placed a hand on Sirius' stomach.

Sirius wrapped his other arm painfully around the girl's shoulders as he felt her hot tears seep into the gown they had draped over his wrapped in gauze chest. Lucy had only hugged her father twice before. She listened to his ragged breathing and felt his warmth underneath of her.

"I'm sorry," Lucy whispered. "I'm sorry I didn't trust you."

"It's alright, darling," Sirius said gently. As he held the girl to his side and Julianne on his other. "I wouldn't have trusted me either." Lucy let out a half-laugh, half-sob and she let this man stroke her curly hair despite the fact that he flinched every time he moved his arm to do so.

Julianne closed her eyes momentarily to enjoy the sound of Sirius telling soothing stories to her daughter. In that moment, Julianne revisited a dream she once had. Sirius would come home to her and the baby. They'd lay down together on their bed as Lily and James had done with Harry. Sirius and James would have daddy-dates with the babies while Lily and Jules had two moments of silence until they came back. A smile spread across her face as she imagined Sirius standing on the other side of the living room from her and Remus while Lucy walked in triangles to each of them.

"I hate to interrupt," Snape's words made Julianne's eyes snap open. "But the Head Auror would like a word."

Julianne pulled herself off of the bed and tried to straighten out her hair. Lucy stayed laying beside Sirius. Jules' eyes turned to Harry and Hermione's beds. They were now empty beside Ron's occupied bed. She ignored the sinking feeling in her stomach as she turned to Kingsley Shacklebolt in the doorway and saw Harry and Hermione running back into the Hospital Wing as though they'd just gone to grab some air.

"Julianne," Kingsley said with a small, apologetic smile. "We're afraid that we must insist that you and Sirius Black stay put until we can relocate Peter Pettigrew."

"Relocate?" Jules raised her eyebrow. "He was in the West Tower. He's been there since-"

"Inconveniently enough, a rat can fit between the bars," Kingsley said morosely. "So we shall put on a nationwide hunt for him, but until then... You cannot travel anywhere outside of the British Isles."

Julianne could have yelled and stomped her feet, but the only thing she could think of was that Sirius Black was lying in bed with his daughter, her deceased twin brother had saved them all last night and Sirius would walk out of this castle as a free man.

"Fine," Jules said quickly. "That's fine." Kingsley searched the face of the woman he'd gone to school with years ago. She turned to her nephew who stood anxiously beside her with a grin on his face. In that moment he looked more like James than he ever had.

"I did it," He whispered as she walked back to Sirius with her arm wrapped around him. "I saved you, Sirius and Buckbeak! I did. I thought it was my dad, but it was me!"

The gnarled remnant of what could only be described as misplaced hope bubbled to the surface of Julianne's skin. She clutched her nephew tightly to her and grinned at him.

"Of course it was," Her face became a walking contradiction. Her eyes teared up with pain but her lips were contorted into a smile as she pulled the teenager into her arms. "Of course, you did. You brave, brave boy."

Harry wrapped his arms around Julianne and started asking about where Lucy was, because he wanted to hug her for standing up to the Headmaster and to thank Sirius for his firebolt and apologize and-

"Wait," Jules shoulders stiffened. "_Sirius_ gave you the world's fastest broom?"

The curtain to Sirius' part of the hospital wing swung open again. Harry stood apologetically behind her as she stormed over and started yelling about how reckless he was, and how dare he buy her nephew the fastest broom in the world. Jules rambled about how he could have died, and how he knew how much she desperately tried to protect him. Sirius winked over her shoulder to Harry, and Harry couldn't help the grin that grew on his face. Lucy stood up and saw the exchange of goofy grins from her cousin and her father. Harry raised his eyebrow at his little cousin and she finally said, "Mum... He got me one, too."

"I can't believe you!" Jules exclaimed. Lucy, Harry and Sirius all began giggling around her. Sirius pulled himself up his elbows.

"Now, now, love," Sirius said with a smile wide across his lips. "I always told you I'd be the favourite uncle."

"By buying his affection," Jules pouted. "You're ridiculous."

"No, I'm very much Sirius," He smirked at her as she stormed over to him and lifted her hand as though to smack him. Lucy and Harry walked towards one another and watched with curiosity as the situation before them unfolded.

"You are just the hugest, most frustrating prick I have ever had to-" Jules fumed as she stared down at his cheeky smile. "Don't look at me like that..."

"D'you think they really love each other?" Lucy whispered to Harry as Jules continued to rage on about the broomsticks. Her father's hand reached up and wrapped itself around her mother's forearm and pulled it down so that her face was inches from his.

"I think there's a very strong possibility," Harry laughed as he turned Lucy away from the bed and started walking her away as behind them their battered guardians began to snog. Lucy turned her head around and saw what was happening and let out a half-disgusted, half-elated gasp. Harry laughed even harder and pulled her towards Ron's bed with him.

* * *

**A/N: Couldn't let Peter just be captured and sent to Azkaban! That'd change everything... Anyway, I hope you enjoyed. :)**


	12. Delicate

**Chapter 12: Delicate**

* * *

_We might kiss when we are alone  
When nobody's watching I might take you home  
We might make out when nobody's there  
It's not that we're scared, it's just that it's delicate._

* * *

**_Hogwarts, June 6th, 1994_**

Remus packed up his things without a hint of surreptitiousness. He looked at a photo that Molly Weasley had taken the day he and Jules moved into the tiny London flat with Lucy and Harry. One of the few weekends that Julianne didn't threaten to blow the roof off of the Dursley's house if they denied her access to the four year old. Jules had red, swollen eyes as she cuddled the two chocolate frog smothered toddlers. They'd just lost their third appeal for custody, and in the background you could see Remus' feet underneath Ron Weasley on one leg and Ginny Weasley on the other behind the heaps of boxes.

His heart ached as he looked at the smiling children in the picture tug on the Jules' ears and he remembered her crying in his arms for ages when they had to send Harry back to the Dursley's that Sunday night. He put the photograph in his briefcase and inhaled sharply. He tapped his wand to his trunk and his objects all went into their respective places without a question. He looked around the office he had called his own for the past ten months.

"Uncle Moony," Lucy said from the doorway, making him jump. "What are you doing?"

"Lucy," Remus looked at her long curly hair and her doe-like grey eyes that stared up at him. "I thought you'd be in the hospital wing with your dad..."

"I was," She shrugged. "He and mum are having another argument about whether or not they're going to keep Grimmauld Place."

Remus chuckled and Lucy walked towards his desk. She propped herself up on it and watched as he tapped his trunks and they all closed up. She followed him around the room as he took down any personal belongings, which were few, from the walls and packed them away.

"You know, mum keeps talking about having to keep Grimmauld Place because of the amount of bedrooms," Lucy tried to add casually as her heart began to race as she looked at the totality of his belongings and how easily he could leave her life forever if he wanted. "She says it's got the perfect dungeon that only his parents would have kept..." Remus smiled to himself as he turned to face the girl.

"I'm handing in my resignation at Hogwarts, Lucy." He said stood in front of her at his desk.

"I know," Lucy said disappointedly. "I know you are, but that doesn't mean that you have to resign from the family."

"Lucy," Remus pushed some of the hair out of her eyes. "I'm dangerous. You saw what I turned into last night and-"

"And I was cross that you and mum kept that from me," She pushed his hand away and looked at him. "But listen, it's just a problem! Harry and I both think it's just a little problem and you shouldn't push us away because you're scared. Maybe I'll become an animagus like my mum and Sirius and-" She bit down on her bottom lip and took a deep breath. She stood up and threw her arms around Remus' sore body. He flinched before he let himself hold her again. "Please don't go away. I'm sorry I was so mean to you last night, I'm sorry..."

Remus stroked her soft curls and held her tightly to his chest. He embraced this moment as he did every moment he got to spend holding Lucy into his chest. He comforted her while she clung to his shabby overcoat. He held the girl tightly to his chest and rubbed the top of her back as he had when she was a crying baby.

"I need you, Uncle Moony," Lucy whispered as the man that had been her reminder of home since she was a small, lost child in Diagon Alley. Every strange face, every loud noise in the night, every bumped knee, stubbed toe, Remus had helped her through it all. She didn't care if he turned into a blood thirsty creature once a month. She only cared that he'd still be around.

Remus looked down at the top of her head. This little girl had always had his hear in her hands like putty. As she clutched onto him now, he made quiet promises that he'd always be close when she needed, that he'd live somewhere close by, that they'd still spend every holiday together. It didn't stop the nagging voice in the back of his head that told him the curiosity about her real father would eventually take over now he was free, but it quelled the cries that emanated from Lucy's small frame. His body ached from his transformation and he told Lucy that he needed to rest. He promised for the thirteenth time that he wasn't leaving her.

* * *

**_Gryffindor Common Room, Hogwarts Castle, January 27th, 1977_**

_Remus was asleep with his head on Jules' lap while she read over her transfiguration notes. He was still bruised and aching from his transformation the night before. Julianne's hair was pulled into half ponytail at the nape of her neck. Her pale skin glowed orange in the firelight. Marlene McKinnon sat down and huffed in the armchair beside her. Her blonde hair glowed a similar colour to Julianne's skin in the firelight. Marlene's buttons were done up one off, and she had pulled her hair into a bun to try and avoid questions regarding her matted hair. She wiped subconsciously around her lips for any stray lipstick and she watched impatiently as James' twin muttered to herself while reviewing notes. _

_"Jules," Marlene tried to distract her. "Julie," She waved her hand in front of her friend's face. "Julianne!"_

_"Yes, Marley?" Julianne responded without looking up from her notes. Remus grumbled something in his sleep and turned around, burying his face in Jules' stomach. _

_"What did you do to Sirius Black?" Marlene asked. Jules' head snapped around and looked at the blonde in front of her. Marlene's dark brown eyes searched Jules' face for an answer._

_"I didn't do anything to Sirius Black," Jules said with her mouth agape. "I don't- Why would you- What has he said?" _

_Marlene raised one of her perfectly sculpted eyebrows and adjusted the buttons on her blouse. She looked back up and smirked at Jules. _

_"Oh, he just started moaning your name in the broom cupboard is all," Marlene said as though that revelation was nothing. Julianne's hazel eyes widened considerably. The transfiguration notes in her hands dropped. "So you're absolutely positive that you two haven't done anything at all to warrant that? Because if not, I'm frankly a little offended."_

_Julianne stuttered and stumbled around words as she lifted Remus up and off of her lap and stood up. She wiped her now sweaty palms on the front of her skirt and swallowed the lump in her throat. The Fat Lady's portrait swung open and Sirius walked in with his tie hung haphazardly around his neck, untied. He stormed over to Marlene and Julianne didn't even look up as she collected her notes off the floor. Her cheeks had turned a scarlet that rivaled Lily's hair. _

_"Marlene, I'm sorry," Sirius held out his hand as though he had some explanation. "I don't know why that-"_

_"Oh, don't worry about it," Marlene shrugged and winked at Sirius. "I'm certainly not worried." _

_Julianne picked up her books and tried to walk around Sirius, but his arm grazed hers and everything dropped out of her hands. Marlene watched with sincere intrigue as Sirius bent down to help her pick up the notes. Their eyes met briefly and Jules buried her head down. _

_"Aren't you still with Hestia," Jules hissed low enough that Marlene couldn't hear as her brown eyes inspected them from her seat on the chair. _

_"No," Sirius huffed. "I may be a lot of things, but a cheater is not one of-" Julianne's head lifted up to his. He lost his train of thought as he watched her right eyebrow raise and her lips press into a firm line. "Alright, so maybe that was a fair assumption..." _

_Julianne wrenched her books from his hand and stood up so quickly she had to regain her balance as she did. Sirius stood up and reached for her waist to help balance her. She slapped his hand away and stormed past him up to the girls' dormitory. Sirius ran his hand through his hair and turned back to see Marlene staring at him with a shocked, but amused expression on her face and Remus propping his chin up on the back of the sofa to watch. _

_"Merlin's bloody beard," Marlene said. "You fancy Potter." She started to laugh and Sirius sat dejected on the sofa next to Remus who rolled his eyes. _

_"I do not," Sirius stretched his jaw and looked over at Marlene. "She's not my type. I much prefer blondes."_

"Yeah, well," Marlene stood up and walked over to him. She draped herself across his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. She leaned in really close and whispered into his ear, "It wasn't my name you were calling out." 

_She picked herself up off of her good friend and patted him on the shoulder. Sirius let out a defeated groan as he watched her walk up the dormitory stairs. _

_"You two seriously need to discuss your issues," Remus yawned. "Honestly, since Christmas, you two have driven us all bonkers with your 'there's nothing going on here,' codswollop." _

_"Shut up, Moony," Sirius grumbled under his breath. Remus stretched his arms out and then draped his feet across Sirius' legs as he prepared to nap on the other side of the sofa. Just as his eyes started to drift shut, the sound of feet stomping down the stairs jolted him awake._

_"Marlene, I swear to you! There is absolutely, bloody nothing going on between Sirius Black and me!" Julianne yelled out of frustration as she stormed past the sofa. The bubbling blonde followed her and pointed her finger at Julianne's chest._

_"This is too rich," Marlene laughed. "You two have avoided each other since we all got back from break! I know you're both lying." Sirius stood up and made Remus nearly fall off the sofa. He turned around and saw Julianne throw her hands up in the air. _

_"What would convince you that nothing is happening between us, that nothing has happened between us," Jules yelled at the girl that she had shared a room with since third year._

_"Kiss him," Marlene shrugged. _

_"No!" Julianne and Sirius said over enthusiastically at the same time. Julianne folded her arms across her chest and shook her head. _

_"Oh c'mon," Marlene leered. "If there's nothing going on, what's a platonic kiss between friends?"_

_"No!" Sirius continued to protest but Julianne had lowered her hands down from her chest. She stood with her shoulders squared and her fists clenched._

_"Fine," Julianne turned to face Sirius. Sirius' eyes widened and he stared at the two girls open-mouthed. If he hadn't been so panicked, he realized it would have been the perfect time to suggest that the two girls share a kiss. He kicked himself for the missed opportunity for years to come._

_"Jules, you've got to be bloody joking," Sirius said. Remus chuckled as he watched the determination seep into her brow. Julianne walked directly over to Sirius._

_"What's a kiss between friends, right?" Jules said as she stared up at Sirius. Sirius looked over at Marlene who looked far to excited for her own good. _

_"Make it count," She said encouragingly. "More than one hippogriff!" _

_Sirius looked down at Jules who took a deep breath and then grabbed his face in her hands. She pulled his face down to hers and place a kiss on his lips. Almost instantaneously, Sirius wound his arm around her waist. He pressed his tongue between her lips and just as he thought he might really get into it, Jules shoved him away. Both of them stood their breathlessly staring at each other for a moment. Julianne turned to face Marlene. _

_She smiled at her roommate and said, "See nothing, like kissing my brother!" She punched Sirius on the shoulder a lot harder than intended. He flinched and rubbed the spot. Marlene's eyebrows nearly touched her hairline. She stared at her roommate and her 'special friend' as he so aptly put it. _

_"If I ever saw you kiss James like that," Marlene started with her mouth fashioned in to some sort of panicked realization. "I'd be... I'd be quite concerned." Sirius rubbed his chin with his hand and looked towards the fireplace while Remus threw his hands up in the air._

_"I bloody well give up on you two," He huffed as he stormed off to the Prefect's dormitory. He turned back momentarily and said, "And don't think I'm not telling James about whatever the bloody hell that was." _

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, June 18th, 1994_**

Julianne sat crouched as she scrubbed the layers of filth off of the floors that she hadn't quite gotten to yet. Her hair was in a high ponytail that often flipped into her face. She had grime under her fingernails and she was wearing one of Regulus' old t-shirts that she didn't mind getting dirty as she sat down for a moment and inhaled deeply as she let the brush do some of the work for her. Sirius walked up to offer her a cup of tea he'd already made. He sat and watched her wipe the sweat off of her forehead. In the developing summer heat, with sweat sticking to her body, sitting in one of the grimiest rooms in the house, Julianne looked like she had just wandered out of the forbidden forest again.

"What?" Julianne asked breathlessly as she looked up at Sirius who was just watching her in the doorway. He held out the mug like it was a peace offering. She stood up from the ground and took the mug. Her fingers grazed his hands and he nearly dropped the mug.

"Sorry," He muttered. "I just... Are you still cross with me?"

"Am I still cross with you?" Jules repeated slowly as though she were talking to a small child. "I told you that I was in love with you. I told you that I would start wearing the bloody ring again, and instead you took me to the broom cupboard where you and Marlene, you and any girl, actually, used to- And now, _now_ I'm bloody well wiping the scum off your bloody Voldemort sympathizer parents' bathroom floor. But _no_ ,Sirius, no, I'm not still cross at you."

She placed the mug of tea on the counter and went back to scrubbing. Sirius stood frozen in the doorway. He felt rage bubble up inside him.

"No one asked you to scrub the filth of the floor. No one asked you to decide to keep _this _bloody house, or move in!" He snapped. Julianne froze on the floor. She looked up at him and watched as his face contorted as though he was fighting against himself.

"No one asked me?" She said quietly. "No one. No one at all. There was not one person who pleaded with me to have a family, to have enough room for all of us, Remus included. Lucy bloody well loves Kreacher and all of his mumbling and Harry doesn't care so long as he gets out of the Dursleys. _No one at all_ promised a 'proper family' before we left. No, no one asked this of me at _all!_" She stood up again with the scrub brush in her hand.

"Are you honestly still upset about Marlene McKinnon? Our dear friend? Our dear, deceased friend?" Sirius said sardonically. "I think you won that round, Jules. Congratulations, her entire family was killed and she died along with them. But look at you, you're still breathing!" He regretted the words as soon as he'd said them. He watched as her lip started to quiver.

"It's 1994, Sirius," Jules said with her voice raising in volume. "I'm not a jealous 18 year old girl in 1978. I'm not naming my children after songs by The Beatles and Eric Clapton anymore. I'm a fucking grown woman!" She screamed the last bit as she tossed the brush from the floor at him.

Sirius dodged the wooden brush and stared at Julianne as her chest heaved and she shoved past him in the doorway. He followed her and grabbed her arm to spin her back around. "Julianne..."

"LET GO OF ME!" She shrieked as she beat against him and he pulled her into his arms. She fought against him, bit him, kicked and threw her body weight around as much as she could. Sirius clutched her into his arms from behind. "Let me go..." She whimpered the last bit as tears slid down her cheeks and she stopped fighting.

"What do you want?" Sirius whispered in her ear. "What do you want, love?" Jules sobbed as she collapsed her full weight into his arms.

"Let me go," She wailed. "Just let me go..."

Sirius clutched her tighter to his chest. He pressed his lips to the top of her head and he finally said, "Anything but that." He spun her around so that she was facing him head on. He let her bury her face into his chest. As she stopped fighting, his arms loosened around her. Slowly Julianne's head lifted up to look at him as his chin tilted downward. Julianne's tear stained face searched his for an answer. Betraying her, her right hand reached out and cupped his cheek. Sirius turned his face to the side and kissed her palm gently.

Julianne felt her heart start to beat a little faster as he started to lean into her. She backed up and felt her shoulders hit the wall before her feet knew to stop. Sirius placed his arms on either side of her head.

"I'm still cross, you stubborn git," She whispered as he leaned in closely to her.

Sirius smiled and let his lips graze hers as he whispered, "Good." Without another moment's notice, Sirius pressed his lips into her hungrily, the way he had wanted to since the moment he escaped and laid eyes on her again. His hands fumbled as they made their way to cup behind her neck and wipe away the remnant tears on her cheeks. Jules let her hands grip at the back of his shirt by his lower back and pulled him closer.

"For the record," Sirius said as they pulled away, gasping for air. "I think Lucy Layla Black is a wonderful name."

"Mm," Jules groaned as she leaned in for another kiss. "It's a shame it's legally Lucy Layla Potter then..." Sirius laughed through her kisses as he lifted her up by the waist and started carrying her towards his bedroom. Just as he laid her down on the bed, a horrendous screaming filled the house.

"_FILTHY HALF-BREED LOVING BLOOD TRAITORS! VILE DISGRACES TO THE FAMILY TREE!" _

Julianne and Sirius looked at each other for a moment. With an exasperated sigh, they both got up off the bed and ran downstairs to see who exactly had drawn back the moth-eaten curtain.

* * *

**A/N: After writing this I have decided that I love writing Marauder Era flashbacks involving Marlene McKinnon and I love all things about Marauders at Hogwarts. Also, writing make out sessions is fun! Ha! Hope you enjoyed! :) xo**


	13. One Peaceful Night

**A/N: Just for the record, up until two minutes ago I had no idea who I was going to have be the reason for the make out sesh being interrupted.**

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, June 18th, 1994_**

"I bloody well told you to get rid of the damn thing thirteen years ago," Jules yelled at Sirius as he skipped steps in front of her to get downstairs. She rounded the corner too quickly and stumbled a little on her feet. Her bun had fallen to disarray at the back of her neck and Sirius stood rubbing the back of his neck as he looked at the three people in the entrance way.

"Hi," Remus raised an eyebrow as he stared at his two friends. Jules subconsciously rubbed her lip, as though there might be any stray lipstick around her face. Sirius ran a hand through his hair, and pretended like his fingers didn't get caught in a lump of tangles.

"_HALF-BLOOD BRATS! TERRIBLE EXCUSES OF WITCHES AND WIZARDS! FILTHY HALF-BREED! DESTROYING THE REPUTATION OF MY-" _Sirius yanked the curtains together tightly and looked at his god-son and daughter standing at the side of his best mate.

"I see you've been introduced to my dear old mum," Sirius forced a smile and reached for their trunks to help take them upstairs. Lucy's eyes shifted from Sirius to Jules to Remus and Harry, then back again.

"We did say that we were coming back on the 18th, didn't we?" Harry said cautiously as he looked at the two adults fumbling around each other like and refusing to touch like they'd been caught having a tiff or a snog.

"Of course, darling," Jules said gently as she hugged Harry and then Lucy. "I just got caught up with... Cleaning."

"Cleaning," Remus said as he looked between the two. Jules looked down at her bare feet and avoided all eye contact. Remus rubbed his eyebrows and shook his head. "So are the rooms set up..."

"Yes," Sirius said as Julianne said, "Not yet." They turned to face one another and Sirius looked at her with astonishment.

"They're not ready?" Sirius asked with an intonation that questioned how long it must have taken her to accomplish nothing.

"No," Jules said as though the answer was evident. Sirius stared at her a moment longer before it sunk in. He turned to face Remus and smiled in the way he always had when he was caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Is everything alright?" Lucy asked as she stood looking at the silent argument taking place between the three adults. Smiles for Remus followed by a smug eyebrow raised or two.

"Everything's fine," Jules said. It wasn't enough to convince Lucy. After staring at her mother for a moment longer, she turned to Harry and nodded her head towards the stairs. She lugged her bag upstairs with Harry and muttered to her cousin, "They were definitely snogging."

"Oh, definitely," Harry agreed as he helped push his cousin's huge trunk up the stairs.

After the children had ascended the stairs, silence fell over the three adults in the foyer. Jules shifted her feet from side to side in a way that resembled Lucy when she had been caught drawing on the walls. Sirius shoved his hands in his pockets and counted the spots on the ceiling that had developed over years of neglect. Remus watched Jules fumble around Sirius like they were teenagers. He placed her hand on his arm and she looked up at him as though he was burning her. Her eyes met Remus' and darted away as she adjusted the aged silver and green t-shirt on her back and retreated to the kitchen. Sirius finally let himself look over to the werewolf in his foyer.

"What?" Sirius asked as though Remus hadn't been witness to the development and degeneration of Jules and Sirius over the years.

"Nothing," Remus shrugged with a smirk on his lips. "Nothing at all." He walked past his mate, pat him on the shoulder and whispered,"You're blushing, by the way."

"I do not blush," Sirius pouted as he hesitated for a moment before following him into the kitchen.

* * *

**_The Potter Manor, July 10th, 1977_**

_James, Jules, Peter, Remus, Sirus, Dorcas and Marlene sat around a small fire in the backyard, passing around a bottle of firewhiskey whilst playing a game of 'Never Have I Ever.' The lot of them had gotten quite intoxicated after the first two rounds of questions as it came out that, in fact, there was very little that none of them had done. Peter picked up the bottle from Julianne's hands. _

_"I've got a good one," Peter said as he tried his very best not to slur his words. "Never have I ever kissed Marlene McKinnon." _

_"Oh c'mon," Sirius laughed. "That's not fair, of course the only one who's done that is-" He stopped laughing as he saw Jules and Dorcas hold out their hands for the bottle. "...But you two are... How... I..." His drunken mind couldn't understand what he was hearing. All those years he had thought they were only having pillow fights in the girls' dormitory..._

_"Who'd you think taught those two hopeless cases how to kiss?" Marlene shrugged one shoulder and winked at the circle of open mouths. She turned to Sirius and grinned, "I'll tell you one thing for certain, it wasn't you." _

_"But-" Sirius looked between Jules and Dorcas who giggled as they watched the poor lad's face fall with evident disappointment. _

_"Hey, you couldn't take credit for me anyway," Dorcas smiled. All eyes turned to Jules and she took her swig of firewhiskey instead of saying anything. Dorcas handed the bottle over to Sirius and then they all paid attention to Julianne once more. _

_"Never have I ever tried to dye my hair to look like Robert Plant," Jules smiled at Sirius. His eyes widened and he ran a hand self-consciously through his currently short, curly hair. James, Remus and Peter snickered as soon as the words left her mouth._

_"Sirius, you didn't!" Marlene howled with laughter as he took a second swig of the whiskey. He glared at Jules and stood up. He walked around behind her and handed her the bottle. _

_"Never have I ever gone swimming in the swimming hole after dark," Sirius said as he leaned down and leaned his chin on her shoulder. Jules squirmed underneath him and turned to look at him._

_"I haven't," Jules raised her eyebrow. "What are you playing at?" She put the bottle of whiskey down. Sirius grinned and he lifted her up from behind. She screamed and he carried her over to the swimming hole. She struggled against him but he just flipped her around and grunted as he threw her over his shoulder._

_"Put me down!" Jules shrieked as Sirius carried her away. "You're such a bloody wanker!" She beat her fists against Sirius' back and he ignored her. He continued to carry her. The five of them left at the fire all took extra swigs of the whiskey before they slowly inched closer to see what would happen next._

_"They're going to snog again," Marlene whispered to Dorcas. "I bet two galleons." _

_"I bet three," Remus whispered from Dorcas' other side._

_"I don't think they'll snog," Peter shrugged his shoulder. "I'll bet five against it." James, Marlene, Dorcas and Remus burst out laughing. They all turned and looked at him shaking their heads. _

_"We'll take you up on that bet, Wormy," James said as he lightly hit Peter in the shoulder. _

_In front of them, Sirius placed Jules down on her feet at the edge of a rock in front of the Potter swimming hole. He stared down at her and she placed her hands on his chest. Jules wanted to push him away, but was scared she'd just fall into the water if she tried. He placed his hands on her waist and leaned down as though he were going to kiss her. Instead, he pushed her. Jules grabbed his shirt in defense and the pair of them slipped into the water. _

_"Wait," James' shoulders stiffened. "Did they kiss or didn't they?" All eyes watched the water ripple for a moment before they realized that they hadn't come up for air. _

_"Oh, nice. Underwater snogging. I'd say that tacks a few more sickles onto your loss, Pete," Marlene grinned as they all headed over to the hole. Peter slumped his shoulders and dug around in his pocket. _

_Under the water, Sirius pulled Jules closer. Unimpressed with his advance, she lifted her legs up and kicked him away. She swam up to the surface, spluttering and coughing. She pulled herself up onto a rock and started to talk to Sirius._

_"Bet you didn't expect me to pull you in," Jules grumbled as her teeth started to chatter. "At least now we're both bloody well frozen..." When she was greeted with silence, she turned around and saw that Sirius was still underwater. "...Padfoot? Shit..." _

_The laughing stopped behind her as she stood up and searched the depths of the natural pool. Her heart began to pound. She jumped back into the water and opened her eyes. Through the blurred lens the underwater world provided, she swam to where she had kicked Sirius. His shirt was snagged on a twig and he had hit the back of his head against one of the rocks. Her mother's voice echoed in her head about being careful and never being to violent in the pool. Running out of air, Jules came back up and gasped for a mouthful of air. _

_"Jules!" James called out as he stood at the water's edge. She tossed her head to the side and looked at James before she descended under the water once more. _

_When she reemerged she struggled to stay afloat as she pulled Sirius up around her shoulders. James' eyes widened._

_"Bloody hell," Marlene gasped. She walked in to a rock that held her up waist deep and James followed suit. Marlene's skirt floated around her as she reached out for the forever struggling Jules. Dorcas shoved Remus and Peter closer to go help. Jules' white shirt was staining with Sirius blood as she struggled to get close enough to Marlene to hand him over. James helped pull the two of them in. Sirius flopped onto James' shoulder, and James' feet met with a rock. He pulled him up to the shore and laid him down. Remus helped Marlene pull in the exhausted Jules. Peter took off his sweater and draped it across Jules' shoulders. _

_"B-bloody g-g-git," Her teeth chattered as a summer breeze blew right threw her. "Tr-tried to k-kiss me..." _

_"Tried?" Peter said over enthusiastically. "But he didn't?" _

_"N-no," Jules crinkled her eyebrows together. Audibly, ever conscious person except Peter groaned. She lifted herself to her feet, feeling suddenly quite sober, and walked towards James who was trying to get Sirius to wake up. Her twin looked over at her and Jules turned to walk into the house. She ran to her parents' room and slipped a few times on the way there._

_"M-mum, dad" Jules said desperately into the darkness. The bedside lamp turned on._

"_Jules," Harold croaked as he wiped the sleep out of his eyes and put on his glasses. "What in the bloody hell are you- Darling, are you wet?"_

_"It's Sirius," She said with the voice of a scared child. "He- he's hurt. I didn't mean to, but he was being Sirius and I- I'm sorry..." June and Harold launched out of bed and the pair of them walked downstairs. Their eyes surveyed the drunken teenagers in their backyard, the nearly empty bottle of firewhiskey and the soaking wet Marlene and James hovering anxiously over Sirius. The parents exchanged a look before they apparated with the boy to St. Mungo's after letting their twins know that they were disappointed in them._

* * *

_As Sirius lay in the Mungo's bed, Jules was asleep in the chair at his side with her head leaned on the bed. She was still wearing the outfit she had on the night before. Her long, printed skirt had dried stiff in some spots, and her white shirt was stained with dried blood mixed with water. James was beside her, passed out with some drool running down his chin as his head hung backward. June and Harold had sent the other four kids home. They would have stayed with the children, but they had been called off on an auror mission. _

_Sirius' eyes flickered open. He saw the sleeping twins at his side, felt the lump developing on the back of his head and then ascertained exactly where he was. He moved his hand to push some of the matted hair out of Jules' face. She jumped up immediately and slapped his hand away. Disoriented with sleep, she looked around a grumbled something unintelligible._

_"Morning," Sirius grinned at her. "You look awful."_

_"Sirius," Jules said with relief dripping from her voice. She smiled at him for a moment and let him grab her hand. She kicked James' leg beside her, "Prongs, get up. He's up. Get up." _

_James made some noises. He wiped the drool off of his chin as he lurched upward and glanced around him. He started to grin widely when he saw Sirius awake and sentient. James hugged his best friend on the bed and then let his eyes drift down to Jules' hand that was still wrapped in his. The pair of them both cleared their throats and let go quickly._

_"How d'you feel?" James asked. Sirius laughed and shrugged his shoulders._

_"I've been better," He said. "Your twin needs a bit of taming."_

_"Oh, sod off," Jules rolled her eyes at the pair of them. "You need to learn to keep your hands to yourself." She stood up and turned to look out the window so that neither of them could see her grin._

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, June 25th 1994_**

Lucy was fast asleep on the chaise-lounge. Her birthday hat hung lopsidedly on her head and her fingers grazed the floor. Feet rested on her shoulders and lead to a heap of disheveled red hair and a similarly asleep Ginny. Plates covered in chocolate birthday cake covered the coffee table. Kreacher picked them up with shaky hands and muttered his way back to the kitchen where he put them in the sink. Harry, Ron and the twins were upstairs trading Chocolate Frog cards. The sound of laughter and voices filled the hallways, drifting throughout the house from the kitchen. Jules and Remus sat around the table drinking tea while snickering at the lecture Sirius was getting for accidentally inspiring a Weasley twin prank.

After some hasty goodbyes and pecks on the cheek, Molly rounded up her children and they all filed back to the Burrow through the floo network. Jules' eyes drifted shut as Sirius and Remus debated whether or not the Slytherin robe swap or the Slytherin hair dying incident was more effectively pulled off. Her daughter was twelve. Her nephew would be fourteen in a month. Sirius Black was a free man, and Remus Lupin was debating Marauder pranks as though it were as controversial as blood purity. The world felt at ease for a fractional moment.

"What do you think, Julie?" Remus asked. Her eyes snapped open and she blinked a few times.

"Hmm?" She murmured as she stared at the two grown men across from her. Their whiskey tumblrs were empty. Sirius' grey eyes stared at her expectantly.

"Robe swap or hair dye?" Sirius grinned. Jules stretched her shoulders and smiled through her bleary, tired eyes.

"I personally enjoyed the pumpkin juice for butternut squash soup fiasco of 1975," She said with a yawn.

"Our girl's tired," Remus laughed as he watched her lean her chin on her hand. Sirius turned to his friend and smiled.

"Our girl," Sirius said. "Is that what we're going to start calling Lucy, too?"

"No," Jules interrupted. "Lucy's my girl." The two men with their shaggy hair and weathered eyes let out an exhale that filled the room. Jules could barely keep her eyes open. They exchanged a glance and then both Remus and Sirius stood up from the table.

"Scissors, parchment, stone," Sirius held out his fist to Remus who gave him a questioning look. "C'mon. Scissors, parchment, stone. Loser carries Jules up to bed."

"Shouldn't that be a prize?" Jules grumpled sleepily with her head leaning on her forearms. "Used to be a prize."

Remus stared at Sirius' extended fist, and then at the sleeping 34 year old woman at the table. He slowly and hesitantly extended his fist. They repeated the game that had played numerous times with Peter and James to see who would be responsible for dealing with excuse writing, or prank clean up. After Remus won uncontested, he walked into the living room and scooped up the little girl with black curls. He had done this habitually for years, and every year she got bigger. She lifted her arms around his neck and leaned her head into his shoulder as the man struggled to carry the young girl, almost a young woman, he thought, up the stairs to her bedroom.

Remus gently placed the girl down onto her bed with her enchanted quidditch quilt. He ruffled her hair and turned to leave.

"Aren't you going to tell me I'm getting to big to get away with that?" Lucy croaked from the bed. Remus froze with his hand on the doorknob. He turned to face the tired girl. He smiled at her.

"You're getting far to big for me to carry, Lucy darling," He told her. She smiled and curled up under her quilt.

""Night, Moony," Lucy said before a yawn lulled her to sleep. Remus closed the door quietly behind him and started to walk towards his bedroom door. This was a house that had once been filled with blood purists, Death Eaters and violently abusive people. He stood in the halls where Sirius had cowered, hid, yelled and escaped. He knew how Sirius hated this place with every fiber of his being, but he only hoped that having the joy of Harry and Lucy might change the haunting, dark hallways of Grimmauld Place. If not, he dreamed of a house close to the Burrow: hidden and secluded without being secretive.

As Sirius finished climbing the stairs with a half-asleep Jules on his back, he turned and shared one last meaningful look with Remus for the night. For as long as they could both remember, they'd been at the sides of a Potter. Location, age and situation may have changed, but the memories of drunken, tired Potter twins would never leave their minds. Retreating into their respective quarters, the night of Lucy's birthday ended peacefully, without tears once the children were asleep, without Remus having to _silencio_ the bedroom so that the wee ones didn't wake. Remus lay down in his bed and stared at the dark ceiling. It all felt surreal, and yet completely as it should be.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I'm definitely continuing this for Goblet of Fire, at least. Don't know if anyone would be into that! But it's happening. This fic is my happy place. :) Hope y'all enjoyed it. xo**


	14. Nightmares

**A/N: Warning: This chapter contains the night of James and Lily's death. Very emotional, full of grief.**

* * *

**_July 29th, 1994_**

Jules lay awake. The summer heat felt suffocating. Kreacher kept moving around. Her heart was still pounding. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw his feet hanging off the stairwell, heard the crying baby in the background. The door was ajar. The door was never ajar.

_"Congratulations, Ms. Potter... You're pregnant."_

Jules rolled over onto her side. She stared at the closed door in front of her. The cluttered trunks, the shoes that made Kreacher curse like his former mistress, and the boxes filled the bedroom. She was alone in the bed. Jules had insisted that she preferred sleeping alone.

_"Julie, you've got to let him go. They've got to take him away now. Please, Julie." _

Julianne watched the lights flick on in the hallway. Footsteps creaked around her door. Someone turned the doorknob from the outside, and Jules had to remind herself again that it wasn't James standing in the doorway.

"Harry," Jules sat up. "What's the matter, love?"

"I've got- I had a - My scar hurts," He rubbed the back of his neck and shifted from right to left. Jules swung her legs out of the bed and walked over to her nephew that had started to have a growth spurt. His growth, however, had gone virtually unnoticed in his bones in terms of pain. Harry only felt pain in his head as he sprouted up to stand shoulder to shoulder with his aunt.

She walked him down to the kitchen, after slipping on her glasses, and charmed the kettle to start heating on the stove. Harry sat down awkwardly at the table and watched as his aunt puttered around the kitchen. Neither of them were going to talk about the elephant that sucked the remaining oxygen out of the room.

_"An escaped prisoner, a former mental patient and a known lycanthrope want to adopt the Boy Who Lived?"_

_"When you put it that way, we sound like the punchline to a joke."_

Jules looked at the unopened Ministry envelope on the dining table as she pulled out two mugs and placed them beside the teapot. She accioed a bit of chocolate and put it on a plate. Setting the plate down in front of Harry, Jules sat across from him at the dining table.

The envelope stared at her as she listened to Harry talk about the dream: Wormtail, an old man, some creature speaking in a wretched voice and a man he didn't recognize. It felt strange to listen to her nephew refer to Peter Pettigrew as Wormtail. He sounded exactly like his father as he did. She tried to focus on the important things, but found herself wrapped up in the memories of the boy she had known as Wormtail versus the vile creature she had met once more nearly two months ago.

His scar hurt so much that it woke him up. Jules' heart pounded as she thought of the little eleven year old she'd sent off to Hogwarts. His scar hurt whenever Quirrell was around. Footsteps padded down the stairs, but Harry and Jules were staring at each other across the table in a deafening silence. Each of them had their own thoughts swirling around in their head.

As Lucy entered the kitchen, she stared at her mother and cousin as they looked morosely at each other from across the table. She heard her mother comfortingly say that it was probably nothing, in a very unconvincing tone, before she turned and scolded Lucy for being awake. Jules rubbed Harry's shoulder and then directed Lucy back upstairs. Once Lucy was in her room, after many complaints that Harry had always been allowed to wake up at strange hours, Jules' feet didn't carry her back to her bedroom. She found herself sitting on the edge of Sirius' bed. He rolled over and grumbled something about not wanting to do it, Prongs. Jules contemplated waking up Remus. She thought about getting up and having a long, philosophical conversation with him. She considered it as she lifted up the quilts and lay her head down on the pillow beside Sirius.

With her breathing shallow and her eyes wide awake, Julianne tried to take up the least amount of room possible. Sirius woke up and stared at her trembling figure at the edge of the bed.

"C'mere," He whispered as he reached out his arms. She reluctantly rolled towards him. She stared into his glistening eyes in the dark room and he pushed a strand of hair out of her face. "You got old."

"So did you," She smiled half-heartedly. They had shouted these words at each other enough that they had lost all negative connotations. They had aged. They had been beaten down by years and the young, hopeful, fearless youth that they had fallen in love with in the other had been replaced by hardship and grief. They were nothing more than familiar strangers for the better part of six months. Despite all of that, there was only so much history that Jules could pretend didn't exist.

Sirius let his hands play with the ends of her unruly hair. His eyes drifted shut as her warm body melded to his like no time had elapsed. He let himself pretend that it was October 25th, 1981, that he had just fought with James about whether or not they should tell her about Peter. Jules rolled to her other side and let him press his front against her back. He spooned her and wrapped his arm around her torso. As his eyes drifted shut, he felt her fingers link with his. Her breathing regulated and he planted a gentle kiss behind her ear.

In the morning, Sirius refused to move. Jules was still peacefully asleep, but the sounds of Lucy's feet running back and forth excitedly made the morning reality inescapable. The grumbles of a sleepy Jules resulted in a pillow being placed over her head as the bedroom door opened.

"Mum," Lucy asked from the doorway. "Why are you in here?" Sirius rubbed some sleep out of his eyes and propped himself up on his forearm.

"She got a bit chilly in the night," Sirius' voice croaked with sleep. "I offered to keep her warm."

"That's a lousy excuse! It's the end of July, you oaf," Jules laughed as she used the pillow over her head to smack Sirius. Lucy watched as Sirius wrestled for the pillow with her mum. She was entranced with the lightness that filled her mother's smile as she watched Sirius start to tickle the woman. A sadness washed over her small frame as she caught a glimpse of the life she had missed out on. The bittersweet playfulness of her parents made her heart ache for a different life than the one with the two saddest people in the world. It wasn't that Remus and Jules hadn't tried. It was just that there was so much loss looming over them as Harry and Lucy grew up that the idea her mother was capable of being playful with anyone at all seemed like a fairytale.

Remus walked up behind the stunned Lucy. He watched as Sirius and Jules both chuckled to themselves as they clambered out of bed, calling truce. The bright flash of Jules' genuine smile made him inhale sharply. It had been seen a few times over the years, but nothing like the genuine grin she had on her face as she walked towards them. Her camisole and muggle jogging pants were wrinkled from the altercation. Jules ruffled Lucy's curls and kissed Remus' cheek as she walked past them. Sirius followed and smiled politely as he pat Lucy on the shoulder.

"I've never seen her like that," Lucy said in awe of the woman that had revealed herself. "I've never seen her... I don't know... She just seemed so young and alive. I've never- D'you think she could've been like that all the time if he hadn't been in Azkaban all these years?"

Remus' heart panged with pain for the girl. He put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed gently.

"We'll never know, love," He said softly. The pair of them slowly made their way downstairs and heard the shrieks of laughter coming from the kitchen once more. Harry sat at the table equally astonished at the woman that was hung over Sirius' shoulder while he put the kettle on to boil. The three of them watched the interaction. Sirius and Jules simply rolled their eyes as they joked about the ridiculous faces that greeted them in the dining room.

For a moment, it was easy to forget that nearly thirteen years ago the world of nightmares and reality had been indistinguishable.

* * *

**_October 31st, 1981_**

_Julianne sat on the edge of the chair in the mediwitch's office. She'd had the elixir, she'd peed on the muggle stick, and now there was absolute silence. She tapped her fingers against the seat of the chair. She stared out of the enchanted windows and looked around her anxiously. St. Mungo's was her least favourite place. The Wizarding War in full swing meant that her simple yes or no question was of little to no importance to anyone except herself. Her heart pounded in her chest. James had handled parenthood and hiding so well. His baby was wanted. His baby was the chosen one. Jules was just on the sidelines. She and Sirius were there to defend and protect. A new baby was not exactly either of their top priorities. _

_The door swung open and a young mediwitch that Jules recognized as the Hufflepuff Prefect from her fourth year stood with parchment on a clipboard. _

_"Congratulations, Ms. Potter... You're pregnant," The kind woman smiled at her. Her palms started to sweat and she wiped them on her muggle acid wash jeans. Jules stared up at the soft brown eyes that followed her reaction._

_"Could you repeat that?" Jules managed to say after her mouth felt dry as sandpaper._

_"You're pregnant, Ms. Potter," The witch repeated patiently. "About six weeks along, so it's still fairly early. There are options if-"_

_"I'm sorry. I have to go," Jules stood up from her chair and pushed past the woman in the doorway. She heard her name being called out, but her feet pounded against the linoleum floors and she found herself wheezing for air on the concrete. The centre of London had never felt more suffocating. Jules walked slowly around the core of the city. Every muggle pushed a pram down the street, it appeared. Small children crowded corners and shop windows. Mothers tutted and scolded. _

_Jules roamed the city aimlessly for hours. It was nightfall when she figured that Sirius might be worried about her and she started to walk towards Grimmauld Place. The recent, somewhat tragic acquisition of Sirius' childhood home had served as a make work project in between Order missions. As she entered the house, she hung up her coat and scarf and kicked off her sneakers in the entry way._

_"Padfoot?" She called out to no avail. The mutterings of the wretched Kreacher filled her ears. She couldn't make out much, but she gathered enough that he wasn't home. Jules wandered upstairs and looked at the portraits of blood purists that hung on the walls. How could she bring a child into this house? _

_Jules felt like she might throw up or faint or both. She did the one thing she knew would make her feel better. She bundled up once more and then apparated to Godric's Hollow. She roamed the village until she came close to the Potter Cottage. _

_The door was ajar. Jules reached for her wand and started to run as fast as she could to the safe house. She entered the doorway that she knew so well and called out for her twin before her eyes fell on his feet as they hung from the stairwell. _

_"James!" Jules screamed. In the distance, she heard Harry crying, but soon the sound of her own pulse deafened her. She closed the distance between herself and her other half. His glasses lay shattered on the floor beside him. His face was contorted into one of shock. His hair splayed across his forehead. "James, get up!" Jules lifted her brother's body up by the shirt. She pulled him into her arms and was blinded by fat tears that started to roll down her cheeks. "No..." She rocked his cold, hardening body in her arms and sobbed over him. Something inside of her was irreparably damaged._

* * *

_Sirius had spent the better part of the day trying on dress robes for the upcoming wedding. He went to go check on Peter in his hiding place, carrying bags of food for his dear friend. As he approached the hovel, he noticed that Peter was gone. His heart started pounding as he searched for evidence of a struggle. There wasn't any. Sirius nearly sank to his knees with the realization that the man he had suggested for the job was a terrible, terrible mistake._

_As he flew to Godric's Hollow on his motorcycle, he hoped, prayed, wished with every fiber of his being that he was wrong about his conclusion. As he arrived, he saw the door that hung haphazardly off of its hinges. As he entered the cottage, he saw Jules clutching James' dead body._

_"James, no," He whispered. Jules didn't move. Harry screamed, wailed for attention in the background. Sirius started to walk towards the woman he loved, the man that was going to be his best man as Sirius had been for him. He reached to touch her, but she screamed and let out a wail that challenged that of a banshee. Conflicted, Sirius stood in the threshold. The sobs of a toddler made him move past Jules and into the nursery. _

_Dead on the floor was Lily Potter. Her red hair cascaded around her. In death, she looked as beautiful as she ever had. Tears stung Sirius' eyes as he reached for the toddler on the floor._

_"'Foot," Harry sobbed out his godfather's nickname and reached his chubby hands towards him. Sirius gently lifted the babe into his arms and tried to soothe him. Sirius clutched the toddler to his chest. It was so dark and so shocking, he didn't have time to notice the new scar that brandished his godson's forehead._

_"Shh," Sirius whispered. "It's alright, Harry... I've got you. I'm here..." He started to walk him towards the hallway and saw that Julianne hadn't moved. She was rocking back and forth with James in her arms and singing softly to his body. _

_"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine," Jules sang through her sobs._

_"Jules," Sirius said. His voice was strangled with grief, "Julie..." Harry whimpered in his ear. _

_"You make me happy when skies are grey..." Jules' knuckles were white as she gripped James' shoulders to her. His head hung limply over her arm. _

_"Julianne," Sirius pleaded. Harry's wet cheeks stained his shoulder. He held the toddler with one arm and reached to touch the one he needed to hold with the other. As he grazed her, she screeched and kept on singing._

_"You'll never know, dear," She wailed. Her voice cracked and crooned with more pain than had ever filled her. "How much I love you..."_

_Hagrid showed up in the doorway. He looked up at scene unfolding before him. Sirius sitting on the bottom of the stairs as Harry fell asleep in his arms. His eyes were red and swollen. Behind him, Julianne kept rocking, crying and singing._

_"Please don't take my sunshine away..." She whispered into her brother's hair. _

_Hagrid and Sirius stared at each other for a heartbreaking moment. The giant man explained he had to take the boy, on orders from Dumbledore. Sirius fought him on it, saying that he was his godfather, and that he'd take care of him. He'd take care of him and Jules._

_"Dumbledore's made arrangements," Hagrid explained. He tried to ignore the broken hearted twin on the staircase. "Lily's sister will take the boy. S'safest tha' way." _

_Sirius stared down at the sleeping toddler in his arms. His ears were filled with the strangled cries of the woman he loved. He reluctantly handed over the baby boy. _

_"Take my bike," Sirius said. "Take it... I won't be needing it." He threw a forlorn glance over his shoulders. Hagrid took the keys to the motorcycle and Sirius rubbed the baby's hair one last time before the giant took him away. _

_After he watched Hagrid fly off, Sirius turned to deal with his other issue. He rushed to Jules' side and tried to pry her hands off of James. She fought against him. She sobbed, she screamed, and she clawed at him. _

_"NO! NO! JAMES! JAAAAMES!" She shrieked into the night as Sirius held her shaking frame to him. Clenching his eyes shut and holding her as tightly as he could, he apparated to Grimmauld Place. _

_Mollified by travel, Jules collapsed in a heap on the floor. She stopped speaking entirely. Sirius held her face in his hands. He pleaded with her. He begged her to say something, anything, but she looked right through him as though he were cellophane. He sat in silence with her for a moment, until something clicked in her brain._

_"You," Jules whispered. "You did this..." _

_"What?" Sirius said astonished. He watched as she clambered away from him. She looked at him with more disdain and distaste than she ever had._

_"You! You were the secret keeper! It was- Oh good Godric..." Jules clutched her stomach and covered her mouth with her hand. Sirius started to walk towards her and she started to scream. "STAY AWAY FROM ME! STAY AWAY!" She backed herself against a wall and slid to the floor. Sirius watched as she traveled far away from him before he stormed out the door, determined to find Peter and bring him to justice. _

* * *

**A/N: I hope that was as heartwrenching to read as it was to write! Reviews more than welcome!**


	15. Juxtapose

**A/N: Trigger warning; attempted suicide.**

* * *

**_November 1st, 1981_**

_Molly Weasley had been celebrating with her children and husband regarding the news of the Dark Lord's vanquish. She danced around the kitchen and sang the happiest songs she knew from her days at Hogwarts. It took hours for the whole story to come out. Lily and James were dead. Sirius Black murdered thirteen people in the centre of London. Julianne Potter was alone. No one had heard from Remus yet._

_That was how the news travelled. Everyone celebrated and danced without realizing that they were dancing on James and Lily's graves. _

_As soon as Molly heard the rest of the story, she left the children with Arthur, including her new baby girl, and found Julianne Potter in the Order headquarters. Mad-Eye and Kingsley said that she had simply walked in six hours previous, sat down and not spoken a word. _

_"D'you think she knows something?" Alastair Moody asked the redheaded woman that watched the young woman in the back corner. They all muttered and mumbled to each other about her, about Sirius. They spoke as though she wasn't there, as though she'd never been there. In her mind, Julianne was present. In her body, Julianne was slowly dying. Molly shushed the two men and walked cautiously towards her._

_"Jules," She said gently. "Do you need somewhere to stay, love?" _

_Silence. Jules didn't lift her eyes to look at her. Her eyes had dark circles around them. Her hands trembled. Her lips looked as though she very nearly chewed them off._

_"Julie?" Molly knelt in front of her. She put her hand on her upper arm. Jules' eyes flicked up like a whip to Molly's face. "Do you want to come home with me?" _

_"Sirius killed Peter," Jules whispered. "James is dead. They took Harry. James is dead. Sirius killed Peter..." _

_"Yes," Molly watched as Jules began to spin the engagement ring on her finger. "Oh, Jules, I'm so sorry..."_

_"Sirius..." Jules said the name as though he were a distant memory. "They say... They say he laughed... He laughed when they took him away." Tears filled her eyes, but they didn't fall. Molly rubbed her upper arm gently._

_"Come now, dear," She said. "Let's not talk about that... Let's go home. I'll make you a cup of tea." Molly started to stand up and offered her a hand to help her off the floor. _

_"It's no use, Molly," Moody said impatiently from the doorway. "I'm calling for Dumbledore. She needs help." As Moody was rolling his eyes at Molly Weasley, Jules whispered something unintelligible. Molly shushed the powerful auror, much to his surprise, and asked Jules to repeat what she had said._

_"I'm pregnant..." Jules said. _

_Silence overtook the room. A pin drop could be heard in the sickening, twisted silence that fell over the four wizards in the room. _

_"Well," Molly said as chipper as she could muster. "Then I'll have to give you some of the heaps of hand-me-downs I have at the Burrow. C'mon then, dear. Let's go." _

_Kingsley, Alastair and Molly exchanged glances before Molly helped the trembling girl to her feet. She lead her to the fireplace, and the floo network transported them back to the Burrow. _

_As they arrived, Jules nearly vomited as the young children swarmed her feet. Toddlers and babies, a frantic ginger husband with a warm smile, a life that Julianne would never have all felt so suffocating. The worst was looking at the twins. Jules stood shell-shocked in the living room until Molly arrived behind her. Molly looked at Arthur, greeted her children and told them all to be very nice to Julie Potter, because she wasn't feeling her best. _

_With that, the three year old Weasley twins tottered over to her. Fred grabbed her right leg and George grabbed her left. The week following James' death was the kindest that Fred and George ever were to anyone for their entire lives. They shadowed Julianne everywhere. One of them was always at her side, and they constantly tried to make her laugh as best they could at such a young age. Often, it had the opposite affect and the twins would simply throw their chubby arms around her._

_"Do you think they know?" Arthur asked Molly a few days after Jules' arrival. She was sitting on the couch, staring into space while Fred and George babbled to each other on either side of her._

_"Haven't the faintest," Molly said as she tried a dish. _

_The week that Jules was with the Weasleys was one of silence and broken eggshells. Molly treated her as though she were a broken bird. They tried to force her to eat. Molly held her hair back when she started to get morning sickness, and she gave her calming draught when she couldn't sleep. That week, Molly Weasley had eight children. _

_Remus Lupin arrived at the Burrow on a Wednesday. He stood, scruffy as ever, in the doorway. His scarred face looked contorted into a pained expression and he very nearly burst into tears as Molly opened her arms to him. _

_"Is she alright?" Remus asked as he watched the silent Julianne sit with two sleeping twins leaning on either side of her._

_"I don't know if she'll ever be alright again," Molly responded quietly. She put the kettle on and walked over to Jules. "Julie, dear... Remus has come to visit." Jules didn't respond. She never did._

_Remus knelt in front of her and stared into her vacant eyes. He stood up and kissed her forehead before walking back to the kitchen with Molly._

_"Do you know about the baby?" Molly whispered. Remus was so shocked by the news regarding a toddler that he froze in his skin. They whispered in hush tones about what could be done. Neither of them noticed the ghost-like woman who hovered in the doorway. _

_"Moony," Jules said. Her voice was hoarse from her lack of speaking. Remus turned and looked at her sallow skin. She looked as though in the past week she had aged beyond her years. He watched as her mouth crumpled into a frown and she swayed from side to side as though she might topple over. "James won't come to visit." Her knees began to buckle and Remus rushed to her side. His arms caught her as she collapsed into his chest. She gasped for air and let out a strangled cry that sounded like a small child. _

_Molly watched as her heart broke repetitively for the woman in front of her. Remus clutched Jules to his chest. His eyes watered as she crumbled like charred wood into him. He turned to look at Molly._

_"How can we help her?" He pleaded. Molly put a hand to her chest and shook her head. She knew a million and one ways to soothe heartache, but nothing about the shattering of souls. "We have to do something..." Remus pleaded as his last remaining friend trembled beneath her own weight. _

_That night, Jules locked herself into the bathroom without anyone except the twins noticing. The two toddlers ran and tugged on Remus' leg. They babbled so fast that all he could make out was something about a closed door. When he finally decoded the message, he ran. Remus unlocked the bathroom door and he saw Julianne laying in the tub with crimson liquid staining her arms. Her cheeks were tear stained, her lips devoid of colour, and she was absolutely still as the life drained from her. _

_Remus lifted her fragile body into his arms and clutched at her open wrists. He called for help and tore off his sweater to try and staunch the flow. As Arthur Weasley entered the bathroom, the two men stared at each other before deciding that there was only one place Julianne needed to be. _

_That night, Remus held vigil at Jules' side. She was under several different draughts and potions to try and sedate her. Her wrists were sewn up and the mediwitches restrained her to the bed. She had come entirely undone. Everyone was uncertain as to whether or not they'd ever see her truly happy again. _

* * *

**_The Burrow, August 20th, 1994_**

Jules' laughter could be heard from inside the house as Sirius wrestled her for the quaffle on the ground. Their brooms lay haphazardly to the side and Sirius wrapped his arms around her, rolling around in the tall grass to grab the ball from her. Remus, Molly and Arthur watched as Jules' bright smile and ruffled hair scrambled to her feet. She tossed the ball in the air to Ginny, who swooped around Harry and Ron skillfully, and squealed as Sirius lunged for her legs.

"Oh, you arse," Jules laughed breathlessly as she wrenched his arms from around her. Sirius grinned at her and rolled her underneath of him.

"You're just mad because you don't like losing," He started to lean down. Just as his lips were about to brush against hers-

"OI!" Fred and George called from above, interrupting them. "SNOGGING RESULTS IN IMMEDIATE DISQUALIFICATION!"

"Jealous, lads?" Jules called up from over Sirius' shoulder. She pushed Sirius off of her and grabbed her broom as she dusted herself off.. "I know he can be a bit irresistible, our Padfoot."

"...Padfoot?" George lowered himself to the ground. Fred followed. "Did you just say-"

"That's my more colourful moniker, boys," Sirius shook out his grass-filled hair and smirked at them.

"As in Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and-" Fred started. Both twins whipped their heads around to Jules who slapped her hand over her mouth.

"You're not Prongs, are you?" The boys said with their eyes lighting up. Jules shrugged her shoulders and smiled. With a wink she walked back towards Remus, Molly and Arthur. She gratefully accepted the glass of water that Molly fetched for her.

"YOU ARE PRONGS!" The twins rushed to her side. Fred wrapped one arm around her shoulders and George wrapped the other around her waist. "You have to be! I mean... How else would you-"

"Know who Padfoot was!" Fred completed George's sentence. Remus stared at the three of them. A smile twitched on his lips.

"Your secret's been spoiled," Remus said as he struggled to keep his laughter internal. Sirius jogged over to them and stood beside the twins and Jules. He watched as the twins started to talk over each other excitedly like James and Jules had when they were young.

"We had no idea that Prongs and Padfoot were shagging each other," Fred said with an exaggerated grin on his face.

"I always figured it'd be Moony and Padfoot," George said quickly. "If anyone were to-"

"Be together," Fred finished. "Besides, we figured Wormtail and Prongs, Moony and Padfoot-"

"It just made sense! But now... Oh, now our theory's been wrong the whole time." George shook his head and ruffled Jules' hair.

Jules snorted first. Her laughter came out in little bursts as she tried to keep it under raps. Remus collapsed next and had to clutch his sides as he gasped for air. Sirius held it together longest. The laughter creeped onto his face only as the twins continued their conspiracy about the Marauders bedding one another, details about relationships that had never occurred got his face to betray him first with a large grin. Following which his eyes scrunched up in the corners, until finally, the twins pushed him over the edge.

"We figured that the only reason the map existed was so that they knew which hidden cupboards were currently occupied by other lovers," They said in unison. Appalled, Molly and Arthur gasped as Sirius finally collasped into hysterical laughter with Jules and Remus.

"MOONY AND PADFOOT!" Jules howled with laughter. "Oh- Oh no..."

"Who is Moony anyway?" Fred demanded as he unhooked his arm around the laughing Jules. He looked between the three adults. Molly covered her face with her hands.

"Honestly, you two," Molly said. "They were in Hogwarts, you have to-"

"Uncle Moony!" Lucy called out as she hopped off her broom and ran over to Remus. She jumped on his side and threw her arms around his neck. "Come fly with us! Mum's being a spoilsport."

"...Oh," George said quietly. "That makes sense." He looked between Sirius and Remus, shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, that _could_ have been the case, I suppose."

"Well, it might have been if it wasn't for that sod," Remus winked at Jules as he adjusted her twelve year old daughter on his arm. Jules snickered and shook her head.

"Oh, Moony," Sirius chuckled. "I do love you dearly, but-"

"Let's be honest," Jules said with a false sincerity in her voice. "I get all the women."

Sirius started to laugh along with everyone until the insult sunk in. He started to smirk and walked over to her.

"Does that mean I get to start complaining about how awful my pregnancy with Lucy was?" He teased as he pulled her from in between the twins. Remus' spine stiffened. Molly inhaled audibly. Arthur cringed for the man, knowing that pregnancy and childbirth were two things that one simply didn't mention around any woman, let alone Julianne Potter.

Jules put her hands on his shoulders and looked as though she might snap out of the joy and happiness she'd had moments before. Her face fell. Her eyes glazed over. Sirius stiffened noticeably and he opened his mouth to apologize.

"Aunt Jules," Harry swooped down on his broomstick and distracted her. "You'll have the whole school year to snog him while we're away. Let's go table joust with Bill and Charlie!"

Jules shook her head and a half-luminous smile played on her lips.

"Oh, you lot go on," Jules extricated herself from Sirius' grasp and nodded to the children. "As your godfather likes to say, I'm getting old."

Truth be told, Jules felt older than she had in her life. Her joints ached after flying around, being tackled and wrestling with a grown man. She stretched her shoulders and then walked past everyone into the house.

"Julie," Sirius started to chase after her but Fred grabbed his arm.

"Best not," George said.

"She needs a moment," Fred shrugged his shoulders. "Come table jousting. Bet you didn't do much of that in Azkaban, _Padfoot._"

"I can't believe you thought I was shagging Moony," Sirius shook his head with a smile and followed the boys.

"Tell us though," Fred implored. "What was the Marauders Map _really_ for?" Sirius grinned and began to explain to them some of his favourite memories from Hogwarts.

* * *

Lucy, Harry and Sirius played a game of gobstones while Jules watched on from the kitchen. Molly prepared some tea and biscuits while Arthur double checked all the information regarding the World Cup tickets. Hermione was going to arrive later that evening, and the twins were already conspiring regarding bets they were to make.

Julianne had lied to Lucy for years. When she was younger, Lucy had always assumed that she didn't have a dad. She thought dads were unnecessary. Harry didn't have a dad, so she didn't have a dad. They both had Jules and Remus, and that was enough. It wasn't until Lucy and Ginny started to have philosophical conversations during games of house that she noticed there might be something missing from her life.

_"Everyone has a dad, Goose," A seven year old Ginny laughed when six year old Lucy told her adamantly that she didn't have a dad, just an Uncle Remus. _

That was the first time Lucy had ever asked her mother about her dad. She lay down in bed after her mother had tearfully returned from the Dursleys without Harry. Lucy looked up at her mother whose sad eyes looked at her with adoration and desperation all at once.

_"Mummy, where is my dad?" Lucy gutted her mother in five words. _

Lucy's mum never answered directly. Lucy only noticed that photo albums that had once furnished bookshelves openly had disappeared. Only pictures of her Uncle James and Aunt Lily covered the walls. Occasionally pictures of Jules, Remus and baby Harry, but Lucy was so young she had no idea about the significance. She stopped asking about her dad at age nine, when she made her mother cry. Uncle Moony told her that her father was dead.

It wasn't until last summer that the photo album resurfaced. It wasn't until posters furnished every muggle and wizarding street warning of a mass murderer that she even contemplated the question again.

_"That's Sirius Black,"_ Her mother had said with a dry throat. _"That's your father.ˆ_"

Now, Lucy sat across a coffee table playing gobstones with the man that had been an alleged murderer, her pet, and her father all at the same time. He told her stories about her mother that made her question what might have happened if secret keepers hadn't been changed. She heard about how her mother used to laugh and smile, how it would light up the whole room. When Lucy looked at the cautious, careful woman that had raised her and Harry seemingly without ever shutting her eyes, she couldn't fathom the reckless, headstrong girl of the stories Sirius Black told her.

"How'd you know you loved her?" Lucy asked after he took his turn at gobstones. Harry rolled his eyes and grinned.

"How'd you think, Goose?" Harry teased as he used the affectionate nickname that he had given her before he could say his Ls properly. Lucy stuck her tongue out at her cousin and scrunched her nose up. "One night, after a romantic walk around our grandparents' manor, they caught each other's eyes across the pond... And in that moment, Sirius knew he couldn't live another day without shagging my dad's twin. The end."

"Oh, you're gross," Lucy giggled. "No, it's got to be romantic! I mean... Think about it, the prisoner and the... The..."

"The mental outpatient," Harry chuckled. "The well-loved mental out patient." Lucy feigned outrage and threw a cushion at him from her seat.

"You two are just like James and Julie were," Sirius chuckled. He looked at Lucy's curly hair. It was pulled out of her face with a headband and bounced as she tilted her head from side to side.

"That doesn't answer my question," Lucy said precociously.

"How did I know?" Sirius chuckled. He stared at the gobstones on the table and let Harry take his turn. Harry knocked one of his gobstones out and he threw his hands up in the air. "Well," Sirius ran his hands through his thick, greying black curls and exhaled.  
"I actually quite resented her for a while, but there was this moment... I dunno. Your mum and I, we fought viciously, Luce."

"My mum fights viciously with everyone," Lucy shrugged. "She fights with Remus. She fights with Professor Dumbledore. She'd fight the Minister of Magic if he threatened us." Sirius laughed and nodded his head.

"Well, we fought all the time," He said. "I lived with her and your dad, Harry." Sirius smiled at the boy. "When I was sixteen, I ran away from home and your grandparents took me in. They were so kind to me."

"They loved him more than us," Jules said as she walked over and sat down next to Lucy on the sofa. Both children smiled and rolled their eyes. "No, really. I could have an awful day, my boyfriend could've dumped me for, say, Alice Prewett," She tossed a cheeky grin to Sirius,"but if this lousy old geezer walked in with a jutted out lip, they'd fawn all over him. That's why James once suggested he stay in his animagus form. At least if they loved the pet dog more than us, we could justify it."

"You had boyfriends?" Harry said with far too much astonishment. Sirius laughed heartily.

"That's exactly what your father said when he found out," Sirius grinned. Jules flicked a gobstone off the table at him. He caught it and playfully jutted out his bottom lip.

"That wasn't even cute when you were sixteen," Remus added as he leaned against the back of the sofa. "What story is the great orator telling now?"

"How he knew that he loved my mum," Lucy said proudly. She tilted her head up and grinned at Remus.

"Oh, this'll be good," Remus laughed. "Have they told either of you about the two years that they denied out right that they cared about each other at all? _After _they were caught snogging in this one's bedroom," Remus pointed his thumb at Jules. Her cheeks flushed red and Harry laughed with sheer delight at the prospect.

"Shh," Lucy shushed. "All of this is irrelevant! How and when did you know?" Sirius smiled to himself and looked over at Julianne who was shaking her head in her hands.

"Oh, I know when he knew," Jules interrupted. "We were 18. It was the night before James and Lily's wedding. He was pulling glass out of my hand- don't ask- and then-"

Sirius cut her off by laughing. "Oh, I _knew_ before then. I knew the moment you walked into Headquarters after arguing with Alastair Moody."

Jules head snapped over to him. Her eyebrows raised, as though she hadn't anticipated that answer. Remus pushed his lips together and nodded with appraisal. How could they forget the day that Julianne Potter argued her way into the Order of the Phoenix?

"Wait, scratch that," Sirius laughed and shook his head. "I knew the day you and Frank Longbottom broke up. You called me- what was it?"

"An arrogant, bloated, insufferable-" said Jules abashedly.

"Insufferable swine," Sirius nodded as he remembered. "And then you stared at me with this intensity that seeped into my skin, at sixteen, and I remember thinking that I didn't know anyone who could be so damn beautiful and yet so utterly cruel. It had to be love, I suppose." There was a pause and he stared at the woman that was seated across from him. She had lines beside her eyes, and her smile creases had deepened, but not from laughing.

"But how'd you know?" Harry asked with as much enthusiasm as Lucy had shown at first. "I mean, alright, so she had fiery eyes and a flaming temper. That's brilliant, we've established that you met her and fell in love."

"Your dad was actually how I knew," Sirius smiled. "He was telling us all about how he was going to ask Lily to marry him. That he'd gotten a ring and this tosser started to panic." Jules scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"I did _not,_" She said adamantly.

"You did," Remus said gently as he shoved his hands into his pockets. Jules tossed him a venomous look over her shoulder and he smiled at her.

"You only ran out of the bloody headquarters hyperventilating in the pouring rain and nearly got killed by four death eaters," Sirius laughed with astonishment. "If I hadn't been there-"

"I would have been just fine!" Jules' tone raised an octave with frustration. Lucy and Harry tried to stifle laughter. Her voice always jumped up in range when she was getting flustered or embarrassed. Sirius raised his eyebrows and shook his head with a smile on his face. That day was seeped into his brain all too well.

"I'm sure you would have been absolutely _perfect_," He looked at her and challenged her patience. She whipped out her wand and flicked it a little to the side. One of the cushions on the armchairs flew into the air and started to chase him around the house while it sang La Traviata.

"Oh, you've _got_ to teach me how to do that!" Harry jumped up and followed his aunt out of the living room and into the kitchen. Lucy followed as she bubbled with giggles. Remus went off to ensure that he'd properly reinforced the back shed and had is wolfsbane potion ready for the following full moon. Jules couldn't keep the grin off of her face, but she tried to tell them, as sternly as she could manage, to go make sure they were all packed for the world cup. As soon as the kids ran up the stairs to go and find their friends, rather than do what they had been asked, Jules felt something launch itself against the back of her head. She turned and saw a familiar, now not opera singing, cushion floating in front of her. The cushion started to repetitively hit her and herded her outside. Every time she tried to charm it to stop, the pillow hit her with more force. She stumbled into the cool, dusk air of August nights and looked around her.

"Sirius Black," Jules called out angrily. "I'm going to bloody well-" There was a pop and he appeared directly in front of her. The pillow dropped to the grass.

"Murder me?" He said with a mischievous twinkle in his eye. "Please, you tried that last August." She hit him on the arm, shook her head and started to walk back inside. "Wait," Sirius grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"You are _such_ a bloody child," Jules muttered. "What is it?"

Sirius pushed some of her hair behind her ear and smiled at her. He felt like they'd spent so much time together over the past year, and yet they rarely had any moments alone since they had screamed their apologies across the halls of his first ever prison cell. Jules' lips dropped open slightly and she inhaled through her mouth.

He let his hand slide down from behind her ear down her neck and over her shoulder. He inspected her face that had aged so much over the past thirteen years. Her eyes wrinkled in the corners, her laugh lines were deeper than he ever remembered, but he suspected they had deepened not because of laughter. She leaned into his hand as it found her cheek again and she shut her eyes. Jules felt the warmth of his rough skin and tried to shut the world out for a moment.

"Do you think you can let me in for more than ten minute increments?" Sirius asked. He watched as her eyes snapped open and she looked over him.

"I'm trying," Her voice came out like the cutting wind of winter. "I- I started sharing a room with you again. I'm..." Her gaze drifted downward. "I'm fucking trying, alright?" She turned away from him and hastily wiped the tears that threatened to fall.

Sirius let his hand fall down. He shoved both hands into his pockets and watched as she started to walk back towards the house.

"Jules, come back," He said. She kept walking. "Julianne." She didn't even turn, or flinch. "Julianne Potter. _Stop. Walking._" She froze in her steps and straightened herself up. She turned her head to glance over her shoulder. "Put on the ring."

"What?" She turned to face him. The chain around her neck suddenly felt heavy and foreign despite having worn it for over ten years.

"Put the bloody ring on your finger," Sirius said firmly. "Do it. Right now."

"What are you-" She started to walk towards him. Her skin crawled and her palms started to sweat.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about," Sirius closed the remaining distance in between them. He reached around the back of her neck and unhooked her necklace. "Put. It. On."

"You're ridiculous," Jules reached to grab her necklace back from him. He lifted it out behind him. "Sirius, I'm not putting on the ring!"

"You will put on the ring, and we _will_ get married, you little shit," Sirius said as he slipped the antiqued ring off of the chain and left James and Lily's rings exactly where they were. He hooked the chain back together and put it in his pocket.

"Aren't you just a bloody charmer," Jules scowled at him. Sirius held the ring out in between his thumb and index finger. She clasped her hands behind her back.

"Jules, don't make me force you into this," Sirius said. He started to reach for her. She backed away.

"I can't believe you're fucking up your second proposal," Jules said with astonishment apparent on her face. "No, I'm not putting on that bloody ring." He lunged towards her and she staggered backwards. "I swear on Merlin's grave if you-" Sirius caught her waist with one arm and pulled her close to him. "If you..."

"If I what," Sirius said down at her. "If I tell you that I'm absolutely mad for you, that I think you're the perfect person to drive me bonkers for the rest of my days, that I want nothing more than for you to just take this ring and put it on the finger that it fits perfectly, so that I can start calling you my fiancée again..."

"I'm not putting on that ring," Jules said softly as she struggled to cross her arms against his chest.

"You were willing to barely three months ago," Sirius growled as he started to lean down into her.

"And I'm not now," She said softly as she tilted her chin up. Just as he started to lean into her, there was a crash from inside the Burrow that made both of them jump. As Sirius watched her retreating figure, he thumbed the ring in his hands for a moment before following.

* * *

**A/N: This was an interesting one to write! A bit all over the place in terms of emotions. Just like Jules! xox Thanks for reading!**


	16. World Cups and Riots

**_June 30th, 1978_**

_A sickening blunt force met with her stomach. Julianne went flying into the cold cement. Her hair stuck to her face, her skin glistened with the damp rain that pelted down around her, and she felt the warm, sickly sensation of blood dripping out of her arm where she landed. Jules reached for her wand and held it up with a trembling hand towards the masked Death Eaters in front of her. _

_"Bombarda Maxima!" Jules pointed to the brick wall adjacent to one of the burly men. Fragments of brick flew out in front of them and knocked two of them unconscious with the force of the explosion. Another one disapparated and appeared behind her. _

_"Oh, Julianne," The falsely gentle voice of Bellatrix Lestrange whispered in her ear. "You are no match for-" Jules forced her elbows backwards and the deranged woman toppled backwards. She turned to face her and spat at her feet._

_"I have always admired your fire," Bellatrix sneered as she held her wand out at her. "It's a shame it should be extinguished so easily... Hasn't your mudblood loving brother ever told you not to walk alone?" _

_The fourth death eater clambered over the rubble behind her. Jules flicked her wand back and sent him propelling backwards. It was then that without explanation her mind started ringing with the sound of a thousand bells. Her body felt as though someone were clawing into her. She collapsed to her knees and screamed out in pain as she felt her skin being attacked by burning knives. The world spun before her eyes and then, thinking she must have been killed to have been relieved from her misery, she collapsed to the ground with tears falling down her face. _

_"Never turn your back on your enemy, Potter," Bellatrix hissed as she hovered over her body. "It's just disrespectful. " _

_Julianne reached for her wand and tried to mumble some sort of curse or hex, but just as she found her grip on it, Bellatrix laughed maliciously. She stood tall and once again cast crucio. Her eyes watched as the woman in front of her writhed in pain on the ground. The rain started to pour harder. Julianne's screams became hoarse and desperate. Without warning, Bellatrix felt herself being propelled backwards. She lifted herself up off the ground and looked at her tall, valiant cousin standing at the end of the alleyway. His wand was out and he ran towards her from over the rubble._

_"Hello cousin," She spat as he held his wand out protectively in front of her victim. She lifted her wand and grinned. "Sorry about your girlfriend. She should be alright eventually." With a twisted wink and a plume of green smoke, she disappeared. _

_Sirius turned towards Julianne. Her wet hair was plastered across her face and her eyes stared blankly at the brick wall in front of her. Her body trembled with scrapes and bruises and she was soaked to the core. _

_"Jules," Sirius said gently as he lifted her into an upright position. "Jules, look at me."_

_Her hazel eyes met his as she shook uncontrollably in his arms. He took off his sweatshirt and draped it around her shivering shoulders. Sirius sent out his patronus back to Order headquarters and tried to lift up the young woman from the ground. He helped support her weight as she tried to find her footing. _

_"I-I'm not your g-girlfriend," She stuttered as her knees collapsed and she clutched onto his chest in the rainy, destroyed alleyway. Sirius chuckled and shook his head. _

_"Always got your priorities straight, Julie," He said as he held her closely and lifted her into his arms to get her over the rubble she'd created. She flinched with every step he took. The rain was the only soothing thing that eased her through the brutal movements. Alastor Moody and James rushed down the street. Alastorpulled out a flask from his coat. _

_"Alright, let's see the lass," The ragged auror said as he approached the pair of them. "Who was it?"_

_"Guess," Sirius said gruffly. He helped Julianne back to her feet and watched as James crossed over to her. His eyes were filled with worry and he reached his arms out for her to lean into. She looked like hell. "I tried to get her, but she disapparated before I could." _

_"Drink this," Alastor shoved the flash into the girl's trembling hands. "It'll take the edge off." _

_Jules held the flask to her lips and drank hungrily. She choked on the potent liquid inside. Coughing, Julianne swallowed and handed it back to him. The burning sensation dulled to an ache and the ringing in her ears stopped. Her vision became a little clear, but she still felt unsteady on her feet. _

_"Why in the bloody hell did you just storm off like that?" James said to his sister as she leaned her head on his shoulder. _

_"Sorry," She whispered. "I'm sorry." Her eyes drifted towards Sirius whose hands hovered as though they wanted nothing more than to pull her back to him. After a few more moments of standing in the rain, Alastor ushered them off so he could deal with the Ministry backlash regarding the muggle alleyway that had two death eaters unconscious under the rubble. _

* * *

**_The Quidditch World Cup Final, August 21st, 1994_**

"Marry me," Sirius said as he leaned towards Jules in the stands of the World Cup game.

"No," Jules rolled her eyes. He let out a sigh and leaned back in his seat. There was silence between them as they roared cheers for the Irish as they scored yet another goal. Lucy and Ginny were entranced with the game. Harry and Ron had never looked more excited. The twins, of course, were elated as their team kept scoring and scoring after they had placed their bets.

"C'mon, just marry me," Sirius said after they finally calmed down enough to hear each other.

"Sirius, how old are you?" Jules looked back at him. Another exciting play was made but she didn't tear her eyes off of him. He stared at her while the crowds erupted with cheers.

"It's not polite to ask that," He smirked at her as the crowds ruckus died down. "But Jules, don't you think that Lucy would be happier if her parents were married?" He smiled enthusiastically. Jules turned her head away from him. Her lips were smiling at the idea of Harry and Lucy at a wedding. She started to rub her ring finger on her left hand as though there were a ring there. She kept her eyes glued to the stands.

"Julianne," Sirius leaned in and was speaking directly into her ear. "Aren't we in love?" His fingers laced themselves in her hair and shoved his hand into his pocket.

She turned her face into his and smiled coyly. "Is that what you call this?" Sirius opened his mouth to say something equally as vague. A whistle in the distance signaled victory for the Irish. The crowd went absolutely insane and Jules turned her head around. She stood up and started cheering along with everyone else.

* * *

After the match, everyone was dancing and drinking around the large tent. Harry, Hermione and Ron were huddled in the corner celebrating and reliving their favourite moments. Fred and George were singing obnoxiously and dancing an Irish jig to celebrate their winning of their bet. Jules sat on the floor enchanting balloon animals in front of Lucy and Ginny who tried their best to be unamused. The girls just wanted to be grown up, but having balloon animals run around them brought them back to earth for a brief moment.

Sirius watched for a moment and then quietly excused himself. He walked outside and took deep breaths.

_"Is that what you call this?_"

Cut to the core he stood there running his hands through his hair. That woman was intoxicating, he thought as he paced back and forth. Everything about her just made him want to scream. She could share a bed with him, find solace in him, but she couldn't for a moment let him think that maybe, just maybe she really loved him. He inhaled and exhaled. The tent door flapped behind him and someone walked over to him. He felt delicate fingers lace themselves with his hand.

"Padfoot," Jules said quietly as she squeezed his hand. She said it as though someone had asked her who was in front of her. She said it as though she were merely labeling him. Sirius tensed and went to rip his hands from hers. She clutched it desperately. "I'm sorry."

"Good," He said bitterly. "You're so hot and cold. You..." He pulled his hand out of hers and stood at her. "You're just... What do you want from me? Do you love me? Do you want me to go away? Do you want me with you? Do you-"

"I want you to give me-"

"Time," Sirius cut her off. "It's always about time with you. How much longer do you need? Because I'm getting bloody well tired of waiting for you." He stared down at her and she opened her mouth to say something in response. Screaming and an all too familiar green flash made both of them turn to face cloaked men with masks that were all too familiar. Curses flew through the air. Fires erupted. Children cried. Pandaemonium broke out.

Julianne ran back into the tent. Sirius whipped out his wand and ran towards a particular cloaked figure that started to torment a young family.

"What's going on out there?" Ron asked as he stood up.

"Everyone, grab your things. We've got to get back to the portkey," Julianne said sternly. She looked at Arthur who immediately grabbed his wand and ran out of the tent.

"What happened?" Harry asked as Julianne grabbed her unpacked bag. She shook her head and looked at her nephew with panic stricken eyes.

"There's a riot," Jules said quietly. "Masked witches and wizards-" The screaming and chaos outside intensified. "Alright, Fred, George, you take Ginny and Lucy. Do NOT let go of one another. Bill, Charlie, go with Ron and Hermione. Harry, stay by my side no matter what." Everyone clambered to their places and gathered as much as they could. As they all exited the tent, hoards of people were rushing around them.

In the crowd, the smell of burning canvas and flesh filled the air in an intoxicating smell that Julianne wished she'd never have to smell again. She gripped onto her nephew's arm tightly, until she heard Lucy scream for her. Her head whipped around.

"LUCY!" She called out. Her head searched frantically, but there were so many people. She started to sift through the crowd. Harry tried to follow her, but in the chaos he got lost from her too.

The terrifying realization sunk in that she had been separated from both of her children. It was her fault, she cursed at herself as she sifted through the crowd with her wand out. A stunning curse flew past her head and hit one of the masked Death Eaters. Julianne gasped as she looked and saw Arthur Weasley with his wand out.

"Have you seen Lucy?" She asked desperately as she ran over to him. Another fire erupted behind them. Jules put it out and then sent a stun curse to one of the masked crusaders.

"Sirius has her," Arthur explained. As the crowd disappeared, the pair of them made it back to where everyone was standing. Sirius was holding a terrified Lucy who had ended up with a broken lip in the chaos. Jules ran over and looked for Harry, Ron and Hermione.

"Where are-" She turned to Fred and George.

"They ran off looking for you," Fred and George said apologetically. Jules looked at Sirius who told her to go. Arthur followed Julianne away just in case. Overhead, a green skull with a snake squirming out of its mouth appeared overhead. Julianne grabbed Arthur's forearm and they stared up at it with open mouths. The sound of a charm zipping through the air made their heads turn quickly towards two aurors and Barty Crouch Sr.

"STOP!" Julianne screamed as she recognized their target. She scrambled over the carnage of the burned down camps and threw herself at the aurors. "STOP! That's my nephew!"

"That is my _SON!"_ Arthur yelled as he ran after the woman. They both ran to the children and inspected them for injury.

Jules helped lift Harry off the ground and hugged him tightly to her. His glasses were cracked and he buried his face into her shoulder like a small child. Jules opened her arms up to the terrified Hermione as well and held them in her arms for a moment.

Barty Crouch stormed over. He pulled Jules off of them, and risked being subjected to her wrath as he glared down at Harry.

"Did you cast it!" He yelled pointing to the Dark Mark that hung ominously in the sky. Jules lunged towards him, but an auror held her back. After his denial, Jules, Arthur and the teenagers headed back to the portkey. Jules kept her hands firmly on Hermione and Harry. For the first time since he was 9, Harry couldn't bring himself to complain.

As they finally arrived back with the others, Lucy threw her arms around Harry. Sirius' eyes drifted up to the mark that had once marked his brother's arm; the terrifying remnant of a time he had hoped would never resurface.

Jules knelt in front of Lucy and clutched her face in her hands. She inspected the swollen lip and kissed her forehead. She hugged her daughter and over her shoulder watched as Sirius glared at the sky. The green light from the dark mark illuminated his skin. His eyes met hers and they shared a morose look of realization that the world was about to get more complicated, and their family, however damaged and dysfunctional it may be, was likely to get caught in the crossfire.

Sirius turned his eyes away from Jules as quickly as he could manage. She let go of Lucy and stood up. She crossed to Sirius and sat beside him on his rock.

"I want the ring," She said softly as she turned her attention to the dark mark in the sky. Sirius let the words register in his mind. He felt her warmth emanating from her as she adjusted herself on the cold stone. "I was going to say that I want you to give me the ring."

Sirius dug around in his pocket and handed the ring to her. He held it out and refused to look at her as he did so. There was a moment of silence where Julianne watched him for a moment. She took the ring from his hands and slid it onto the finger it fit the best. Julianne then slid her hand onto his arm and looked over at Lucy interacting with Harry.

"What are you doing?" Sirius whispered as he stared at her hand on his arm: the hand with the delicate antique ruby ring, the hand that had both hit him and held him.

"Getting married," She said with a small smile. "If you'll still have me." Sirius let his eyes trail up her arms to her face. In the green light of a Dark Mark, he felt tears sting his eyes. He contemplated turning her down, he contemplated screaming and telling her that he wanted her to move out. Instead, a new voice echoed in his head, a new memory that blocked out all others.

* * *

"_SIRIUS! HELP!"_ _Lucy screamed as she caught sight of him fighting off some masked men and pushing his way through the crowds. An elbow caught the side of her face and she stumbled backwards. She kept screaming until suddenly she called out the one word that had made him stop in his tracks. "DAD!" _

_His head turned. He saw a terrified girl with blood trickling down the side of her face from her lip. She was being moved and jostled around by people who were bigger, faster and stronger than she was. Her grey eyes stayed glued to him as she struggled to find footing. "DAD!" She screamed again with desperation apparent. _

_Sirius tossed one last stun charm over his shoulder before he started to push people out of his way. He climbed over rubble and carnage until he had thrown the last person he could out of his way. When he got there, Lucy's cheeks were wet with tears. He threw his arms around her and lifted her protectively into his arms. He kept his wand out while he held the girl, his daughter, and promised her he wouldn't let her go. Wouldn't drop her. Would always find her. He carried her past the point where his arm ached and he couldn't carry her any longer. He carried her until he was certain he could put her down and hold her hand without losing her. He protected her fiercely, to the point where when Arthur Weasley approached her before him, he nearly blew his head off._

_It was in that moment that Sirius accepted finally and completely exactly what it meant to be a father._

* * *

Sirius looked at the woman before him, the new Julianne that he had had to learn to love again. He watched her as her eyes pleaded forgiveness for the way she had been lately. All he could muster in response was, "She called me 'dad'."

Julianne sat up straight. Her hand stayed firm on Sirius' arm.

"She- Lucy?" Jules blinked as she looked at Sirius. A tear slipped down his cheek. "Lucy called you 'dad'?"

Sirius nodded. He turned away from her as a second tear threatened to fall. Julianne sat with that revelation for a moment. She lowered her hand to his and squeezed her fingers around it.

"She was caught in a crowd of people," He explained. "She was caught and lost... And she saw me... And she called me 'dad'." His voice trembled as he spoke, "And Jules, she was hurt. She was hurt and I carried her... And I could have killed, murdered, tortured all of those people. I could have killed every single one for keeping her away from me, for scaring her, for making her bleed."

Julianne stared at her hand over his for a while. She looked up at his weathered profile and how his cheeks glistened.

"Lucy Layla Black is a great name," She said quietly. His lips curved upward. Julianne stood up, letting go of his hands, and then kissed his temple. She started to walk away, and he called after her.

"Julianne Helena Black will be a great name, too," He said. Jules froze and smiled as she turned back towards him.

"Will be? So you'll marry me?" She said.

"You'll have to ask me properly," Sirius shrugged. Jules laughed and she crossed over to him. She grabbed his face in her hands and planted a kiss on his lips.

"Mum, Dad," Lucy said as she crossed to them. "Cedric and Amos are here. It's time to go. Stop snogging. It's gross."

Jules turned and grinned at her daughter. "How'd you think you were made?" She laughed. She crossed over to Lucy and wrapped her arm around her shoulders which were starting to inch closer towards hers.

"I'd rather not think about it," Lucy wrinkled her nose. Sirius stood up from the rock and followed suit.

"You called him 'dad'," Jules whispered to her daughter. Lucy rolled her eyes and elbowed her mum.

"Don't get all excited about it," Lucy grumbled. Jules laughed and squeezed her closer.

"Too late!"

* * *

**A/N: Hope you enjoyed it! Riots are fun and difficult all at once!**


	17. Precarious Goodbyes

**_12 Grimmauld Place, August 30th, 1994_**

It was four in the morning. The doorbell rang and Walburga's portrait started screaming into the night. Sirius pulled a pillow over his head and Jules dragged herself out of bed. She looked over at Sirius and nudged him in the side to get him up as well. Sirius glared at her through his sleep-filled eyes and slowly shuffled downstairs. Julianne followed.

"_TARNISHING THE NAME OF BLACK! FILTHY BLOOD STAINS THESE WALLS! TRAITORS!" _

"Shut _up_, you old bag!" Jules grumbled as she pulled the curtains closed. Sirius walked down the narrow hallway and opened the door. Harry stood in the threshold with his hand clutching his scar. Vernon Dursley stood behind him.

"It's four in the morning," Sirius said as he ushered the boy inside but kept his hand in front of the robust man to prevent him from walking inside.

"I didn't _want_ to drive out," Vernon growled. "But Duddy couldn't sleep with his moaning." His eyes drifted over to Julianne. He remembered her threats of magic curses and hexes. He remembered the years that they tried to convince her Harry was normal. He remembered the enchanted flowerbeds, the screaming doorbell, and especially Dudley's pig tail. When the boy started screaming in his sleep out of pain, Vernon Dursley did not want to risk any other magic being inflicted upon his household by the loose canons of his wife's sister's husband's side of the family.

"Thank you, Vernon," Jules said as she rubbed Harry's arm comfortingly.

"Yeah, thanks, mate," Sirius said as he slammed the door in his face. He turned down the narrow hallway and then added, "Harry, how on earth did a _muggle_ find this house?"

"I had him look on the other side of the road," Harry shrugged. "Then I pointed and it appeared just in time for him to look over."

"Well, mumsy," Sirius said to the curtained portrait. "Turns out your efforts were all for naught. Muggles can walk to the door." He ran his hands through his hair and chuckled.

"Is it still hurting?" Jules pushed the hair out of Harry's forehead and inspected it. He was tall enough to look her in the eye without any neck strain. Harry shook his head. Sirius watched as she planted motherly kisses all over Harry's forehead despite his cringing and protesting.

"Aunt Julie," Harry wiped some of her spit off of his forehead. "I'm _fourteen_."

Jules smiled and hugged her nephew. She shook her head and said, "Oh, Pronglet. You'll always be a baby to me."

"Prepare for it, Harry," Sirius said. "You'll be treated like this at your wedding." He ruffled Harry's hair as he announced that he was going to go make sure Harry's bed was in order. Harry and Jules walked into the kitchen. Julianne pulled out some chamomile tea for him and put the kettle on to boil. Harry explained that he kept having dreams of a high, clear voice bossing people around. He explained that he saw the dark mark, and every time his head would hurt. He didn't mention the appearance of Peter Pettigrew, for fear that she'd panic even further.

"Before these dreams," Jules said calmly as she could manage. "When was the last time your scar hurt, love?"

"First year," Harry said. "Around Professor Quirrell."

Julianne nodded her head and pat his shoulder. She summoned the mug and honey for his tea. As the teapot poured the herbal elixir into the cup, Jules stroked her chin. Memories of the Order and hiding places filled her mind: unforgivable curses, masked Death Eaters, and years of horrors done to muggles and muggleborn witches and wizards. She looked at the young man that sat before her. His voice had barely broken from puberty. He was just a kid, and yet he would be entering the same world that she and James had been thrust into 16 years before.

Voices started to carry down the stairs. Sirius and Remus rounded the corner and looked at the two Potters sitting at the table. The two men turned to each other.

"You're sure it was Death Eaters at the riot," Remus whispered as they hovered before entering the kitchen.

"I'm positive," Sirius said. Remus turned and looked at Jules as she watched the boy who every day looked more and more like the half that she missed of herself. "He's not safe, Remus..."

"He never has been," Remus sighed. At the age of 14, the boy was an orphan left with deranged muggle protectors. He'd fought off the Dark Lord twice. He'd made enemies with the Malfoys, and he'd been cursed with a scar that broadcasted to the world exactly how chosen he was by the darkest magic their world had ever seen. As the two men stared at the Potters, they silently agreed in the early morning haze that there wasn't a river or mountain that they could not move if it meant keeping the son of their best friend safe.

* * *

**_Order Headquarters, July 3rd, 1978_**

_Julianne sat in the corner of the headquarters with a blanket wrapped around her on one of the cots. They'd given her potions and remedies endlessly since her encounter with Bellatrix Lestrange, but she didn't sleep a wink. Any time she closed her eyes, she could feel the curse start to prick and tingle against her skin. James and Lily watched from their perch by a pot of tea as she stared blankly at the wall ahead of her. _

_"She'll be fine," Alastor Moody said gruffly as he pat James on the shoulder a little too gruffly. "Don't you worry yourselves about her. I've suffered many a cruciatus curse. Makes you stronger." _

_As the man hobbled away on his artificial leg, James turned to Lily with a panicked expression on his face. Lily laughed and she put her hand on his arm._

_"James," Lily said gently. "She's not had a limb fall off yet, and she's not dependent on firewhiskey. Julianne is stronger than you give her credit for." _

_"I know, but-" James turned and looked at his sister. "But, Lily... She hasn't even had it in her to be mean to you yet today. I mean, you bloody well agreed to marry me, and the sod hasn't made one snarky comment." He looked back at his fiancée and then smiled brightly. "You agreed to marry me." _

_"I did," Lily smiled right back. She planted a chaste kiss on his lips and then turned as Sirius, Remus and Peter walked in. Sirius muttered a quick hello before he crossed the dingy headquarters and sat beside Julianne on the cot. He pulled out a warm pasty from Diagon Alley and placed it beside her on the cot. _

_"Look at that," Lily smiled as Remus walked over. Remus watched as Sirius offered Julianne more potion and tried to coax some food into her. He pushed the matted hair out of her face and tentatively checked her temperature. _

_"D'you think they've finally gotten over their sibling rivalry?" Peter asked as he stood beside James. All three of his friends turned and looked at him with a confused expression. James bit his lip to stop himself from laughing at his clueless friend. Remus put his head in his hands and shook his head._

_"Sibling rivalry?" Lily raised her eyebrow as she looked at James. She turned and watched as Sirius finally pulled himself away from her and started to walk over. He shoved his hands in his pockets and ignored Marlene as she waved at him on his way over to James, Lily, Peter and Remus. _

_"She hasn't eaten in days," Sirius grumbled to James as he let out a sigh. James pat his mate on the shoulder and smiled._

_"Don't worry, Pads," James said. "She'll be fine in no time." _

_"She hasn't even been mean to Lily yet," Sirius said with concern in his voice. Marlene walked around from behind him and put her hand on his arm._

_"She's just shaken up," Marlene added. "It's Jules. That girl is never down for long." _

_"Anyway," Remus said. "We've got important things to discuss... On my last mission..."_

_Remus distracted everyone from Jules. They leaned their heads in and discussed the movement and growth of death eaters. More Order members filed in. Alice and Frank Longbottom joined in on the conversation. Congratulations about James and Lily's recent engagement were made. The conversation swirled in circles to the point where everyone ended up more confused than they had been previously about the situation. _

_Everyone was so entrenched in conversation that no one noticed Julianne stand up from the cot with the pasty that Sirius had brought for her. No one noticed as she walked towards the group, until Remus audibly inhaled as he saw her. All faces were on her, and she swallowed her mouthful of pasty. _

_"Thanks," She muttered to Sirius in reference to the savoury baked good that offered her more than the tasteless and sometimes bitter potions that Moody had made her consume. Sirius nodded and she stepped into the group. Jules looked over at Lily and noticed the diamond ring on her left hand. She looked up and smiled for the first time in four days._

_"Amortentia," Jules said knowingly. Lily's face contorted into a look of shock and then of glee. Without warning, the red head threw her arms around Julianne. Jules winced with the force of Lily's weight against her. She lifted her arms up onto her back and laughed a little. She looked over at James who had a bemused smile on his face as he watched his fiancée hug his twin. _

_Lily laughed and held her future sister-in-law tightly as she could. She shook her head and held Julianne for a moment longer before letting her go. Jules turned to Marlene who beamed at her. The entire circle went around and hugged her until it got to Sirius. The pair of them stood awkwardly across from one another. Sirius grinned down at her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. _

_"Aren't you glad I chased after you?" He teased. Jules rolled her eyes and elbowed him in the side._

_"I think I could've handled another deranged Black if it came down to it," She retorted with a playful, but tired smile. Sirius laughed at her and then unhooked his arm from around her shoulder. Marlene replaced his arm with hers and Jules leaned her head on her best friend's shoulder. _

_"Good to have you back, Julie," Marlene said sweetly. "You've missed a bit in the last few days." _

_"I haven't really," Jules said. "I've been paying attention... There's new developments, recent attacks and-"_

_"Oh hush," Marlene rolled her eyes and rubbed Jules' shoulders. "I meant more in terms of_ romance_ but then again, you'd not be interested in that, would you?" _

_Jules playfully pushed her friend away from her. They were about to have a duel, when Mad Eye and Dumbledore burst into headquarters with sullen faces. New missions, new assignments and the revelation of something terrible. _

_"Fabian Prewett is dead, and Gideon is missing," Dumbledore's voice cut through the air like ice. _

* * *

**_King's Cross Station, September 1st, 1994_**

"Don't forget to write," Jules said as she hugged her reluctant nephew and then her daughter. "I haven't got a spy like I had last year," Jules grinned at the kids.

Harry and Lucy made their promises: a letter at least every week. Sirius stood behind her and watched as Lucy threw her arms around Remus. His heart panged as the little girl planted a kiss on Remus' scarred cheek. As though they'd both forgotten about him, they turned and started to walk towards the train. Sirius inhaled sharply, and then, without warning, Lucy stopped in her tracks. She turned around and ran straight into his arms. Harry stood awkwardly behind her. As soon as Lucy let go of Sirius' neck, she grinned at him and said, "I'll write you too, you big dog."

"You better," Sirius laughed as he ruffled her hair. Lucy started to walk away from him backwards, and then turned to run to her trunk and catch up with Ginny Weasley and Colin Creevey. Harry hovered for a moment before he hugged Sirius and then retreated quickly with a wave.

Jules turned to leave and caught sight of Fred snogging Angelina Johnson outside of the train.

"Oi," She called out. "What would your mother say?"

Both teenagers started to blush. Fred tossed her a nasty look before running onto the train. After a few moments, the whistle blew and the three adults stood around watching the scarlet engine chuff away to the castle that had defined their lives.

Jules instinctively reached for Sirius' hand as he went to chase the train. Her fingers linked tightly around his and he looked back at her with a small smile. Remus watched his best friends. Jules smiled at Sirius and pulled him over to her. Sirius stood beside her and pulled her into his arms.

"We just saw the children off to school," Jules said with a smile. "We just saw _our_ children off to school."

"How's that for feeling old?" Sirius laughed. Remus felt a dull ache in his chest as he had never been able to make Julianne smile like Sirius could. He had never been able to make her angry like he did either, but the passion just wasn't there. He envied the love that they had for each other. Remus walked out of the station with them. He went back to Grimmauld Place with them. He watched as they had one of the few moments of joy together. Later that school year, Remus would wish that this innocence that still surrounded them now, the peace that hung so haphazardly in the air would still remain.

The joyful days were numbered.

**A/N: Thanks for reading! :)**


	18. Stones, Snakes and Goblets: Oh My!

**_Dumbledore's Office, November 3rd, 1994_**

"What do you _mean_ Harry's name came out of the Goblet of Fire?" Jules slammed her fists against the desk and turned to walk away. "Can he not have _one_ bloody year here that he's not in fucking mortal peril?!" She ran her hands through her hair and exhaled audibly. Sirius stood in absolute shock as he watched his old headmaster stroke his long beard. Behind him, Julianne paced back and forth.

Dumbledore with all of his wisdom explained as best he could that someone had put Harry's name in the Goblet of Fire. It had to be someone who was at least the age of 17. Julianne stopped in her steps. She turned to Dumbledore and stormed over to his desk. The woman leaned over to arguably the most powerful wizard alive and stared at him. Her black hair swung in front of her shoulders. Her hazel eyes narrowed. Sirius moved his arm to her waist and pulled her down into a chair. He rubbed his temples and shook his tired head.

"To hell with it!" Jules threw her arms in the air. "Someone put my nephew's name in for the bloody Triwizard Tournament, and now he's bound to it and-" She buried her head in her hands. "First it was Mountain Trolls, then it was three-headed dogs... Giant spiders and basilisks... Last year, it was you and bloody dementors," Jules looked up at Sirius.

"Julianne, I need you to understand the gravity of the situation," Dumbledore said with measured speed.

"Understand the gravity..." Jules repeated back to him. "You need me to- You think I'm-" Julianne was about to burst with anger when a familiar off kilter clicking made her turn her head. In the doorway, Alastor Moody hovered uncomfortably. Sirius watched as the man hobbled over to the desk.

"Julianne, Sirius," Alastor nodded his head curtly. "Professor Dumbledore, you asked for me."

"Yes," Albus said kindly. "Sirius, Julianne. You may stay for supper in the Great Hall. A carriage will wait to escort you back to the nearest place from which you can apparate."

Jules stormed out of the office. Sirius trailed behind her. Her legs moved quickly as she made her way through the winding hallways like clockwork. She stood outside of the Fat Lady's portrait.

"You again," The fat lady said as she looked down at Julianne. "Aren't you a bit-"

"Open up, you old hag," Jules snapped. The fat lady feigned hurt and astonishment. "I said _open up_ or so help me I'll slice you open."

"Julianne," Sirius said as he stood behind her. "What are you do-" He didn't get to finish his sentence as the portrait swung open. Jules stepped inside the common room and saw Harry reading over his Charms notes by the fireplace. Sirius had to take a moment to absorb the scene. He watched as Julianne's figure stormed over to the boy who looked identical to his best mate.

"Harry James Potter," Julianne growled. She glided across the maroon and gold common room. All students turned to face her, a few even jumped from their seats, and she stood at the back of the sofa. Harry turned, panicked, and faced his aunt. Her eyes were aflame with rage behind her glasses. Her fists were clenched. She was wearing a pair of jeans, her favourite leather boots and an old knitted scarf on top of one of Sirius' sweaters.

"Aunt Jules?" Harry said. He was completely shocked by her appearance at Hogwarts. It usually took at least six months for the first concerned letter from Dumbledore to elicit an appearance. He figured with Sirius around he might not have to deal with her.

"Did you put your name in the goblet of fire?" She said sternly. Harry's jaw dropped. Dumbledore had called her here regarding _that_. He looked up at her and around at his classmates who had started to snicker.

"No!" Harry snapped at her. "Why are you here? How did you get in?"

Julianne stared at her nephew for a moment longer. He wasn't lying. She was just about to lean over and kiss him on the forehead when Sirius grabbed her arms and started apologizing to Harry.

"Sorry, mate," Sirius said as he pulled Jules backwards. She struggled against him with a look of betrayal on her face. "You know how she gets sometimes." Sirius winked and then started forcing Julianne out of the common room. "Carry on, everyone!"

"I haven't said hi to Lucy yet," Jules complained as she tried once more to turn back towards all of the students. Sirius grabbed her, lifted her up onto his shoulder and carried her out. "Sirius!"

"You're bloody awful," Sirius shook his head and laughed. "Has Moony never told you that your parenting style is an embarrassment to both the children and yourself?"

"Yeah, well this is what you missed while you were in Azkaban," Jules pouted as he finally put her down in front of him.

"You've gone mad," Sirius said with a teasing smile. He leaned over and kissed her pouting lips. Jules scowled at him and then stormed down the staircase. Sirius followed her down towards to Great Hall. "Oh, c'mon, love. He's fourteen. How would you have felt if your mum and dad stormed into the Common Room in our fourth year?"

"I'd wonder why they were visiting _you_," She tossed back over her shoulder. Sirius roared with laughter. He finally caught up to her and grabbed her hand.

"Jules," He said gently. "Children grow up. I might not have been there to see Harry and Lucy grow up, but I was around for us growing up and-" He watched as her face stopped being angry. She looked around at all the enchanted portraits and tears welled up.

"And James and I would've hated the stunt I just pulled," She said quietly. Jules struggled to blink back tears as her face fell on him. "But they're all I have..." Sirius pulled her into his arms and leaned his head against the top of hers.

"You've got Remus and me," He said softly. Jules nodded into his chest. They stood there in each other's arms for a moment. "I love you, Jules. Nothing's going to happen to them, alright? Promise."

* * *

**_The Potter Manor, August 18th, 1978_**

_Sirius snuck out of Julianne's bed while she was still asleep. He walked into his bedroom and sat on his floor. His heart was pounding. His palms sweat. His head was spinning. He had told her that he was in love with her, and as he woke up with her figure in his arms, he panicked. Julianne Potter was stubborn. She was stubborn to the point of being a danger to herself, and she refused help so much that she often got hurt. Julianne Potter's parents were both dead as of the day before. Everything was crumbling down around the damned house because of the war, and yet he had confessed his love to her. Sirius was so panicked about the impact his words might have at a time like this, he didn't even think of the very obvious, very volatile second problem that this confession elicited: James Potter was his best friend and her twin brother._

_"What did you do," Sirius said to himself softly as he held his head in his hands. Sirius paced back and forth in front of his bed. _

_The whole house was asleep. Sirius snuck downstairs as quietly as he could so he didn't wake anyone. He hovered around in the kitchen. He searched the cupboards for things he wasn't sure he was looking for. He fixed the broken teacup that Jules had cracked the night before. He placed it on the counter. Sirius sat down on the kitchen table. He shifted to a chair. He changed seats seemingly endlessly until he just decided he'd rather stand up. Upstairs, Jules was in bed. She was in bed, sleeping, oblivious to the world. James and Lily were probably holding each other, planning some sort of make up wedding ceremony. Sirius kept replaying what had happened last night. His awkward, haphazard confession to the girl he'd hauled upstairs. _

_He told her he loved her. He had said it, and she had heard it. They had lost so much and gained so little. Sirius slammed his fist against the wall and cradled it in his other hand as he stood silently in the kitchen. He felt tears sting in his eyes as he missed the kind words that Harold and June would have had for him in this situation. He sat on the floor, clutching his bruising hand until Lily made her way into the kitchen._

_Lily stared at Sirius. His eyes were red with exhaustion and the hints of tears that he'd never consider letting her see. Lily watched him for a moment. She sat down beside him and placed her arm around the young man's shaking shoulders. She linked her arm around his head and leaned it onto her shoulder. It was such a gentle show of solidarity in a time of mourning, in a time of need. Sirius started to tear up once more. His shoulders shook. _

_James and Jules stood across from each other in the hallway for a long moment. Her face was pale with the realization that she had woken up alone in a house that no longer felt as joyous as it had and a blood thirst for whomever had stolen her parents from her. James mirrored her, as he always had. With few words and plenty of intention, the twins crossed to each other and held each other in their arms as the grief took hold again. Neither of them shed a tear. They embraced with blank expressions of shellshock, like Julianne had had after the Cruciatus curse. _

_"Sirius told me he loved me," Jules whispered into her brother's shoulder as her cheek leaned against it. James' grip around her loosened._

_"He what?" James held her away from him. "He said he-"_

_"Was in love with me, and I said that I was too, and -" Jules' breathing started to become shallow. He watched her hazel eyes search the floor for answers or reasoning behind it. "This is terrifying." _

_"Yeah," James said quietly. His eyes were wide and his mouth agape. "It is. It's bloody well terrifying. We have... We have funerals to plan, and grave stones to pick, and he chooses _now_." _

_Jules placed her head in her hands and her shoulders heaved as she let out something halfway between a sob and a scream. James pulled her back into his arms and held her there. Since Bellatrix Lestrange had crucioed Jules, she'd been just a little bit off. Her reactions seemed either slower or too fast. Her emotions were always just at the edge of a tipping point. She had horrific, terrible nightmares that often resulted in her physical pain. Sometimes, she couldn't finish his sentences, even when she wanted to. Slowly and without much desire to, the twins walked downstairs to face the two other people waiting for them. _

_As they entered the kitchen, James tried his best to keep himself calm. He watched as Lily flipped bacon around on a frying pan while she had enchanted something to start cleaning and scrubbing the cupboards. Her compulsive organization in times of distress made him smile a little. _

_Jules sat down at the kitchen table across from Sirius. They stared at each other in silence for a long time. Both of them had their revelations from the night before written across their faces. His eyes were red and swollen, hers were threatening to cry. James and Lily spoke around them, and neither could say a word. Sirius opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Julianne left the table. She ran outside in nothing but her sleeping shorts and camisole. Her hair flew behind her and her feet scraped against the cobblestone. Her legs carried her to the farthest house she could find. She fell to her knees and struggled for air. Slowly, she lowered herself onto the cobblestones and stared up at the blue summer sky. _

_"Julie!" Sirius' voice filled her ears. He knelt down beside her on the cobblestone streets. Behind him, James was running towards her. "Are you alr-"_

_"I'm _fine,_" Jules snapped. "I'm bloody brilliant! My parents are dead! The Dark Lord is winning, but I'm just-" She covered her face with her hands and mumbled something incoherent. _

_"What?" Sirius stared down at her. She lifted herself up and looked at him. A tear streaked her cheek. _

_"Don't make me talk about it," She said quietly. "I don't want to talk about last night. Please, don't make me." Sirius looked at her porcelain skin and striking dark hair. James caught up behind him, but he didn't care. Sirius pulled Julianne into his arms and held her there for a moment in the middle of the street._

_"We won't talk about it," He whispered. James hit up upside the back of the head. He looked down at them and Jules finally stood up from the street._

_Bathilda Bagshot stared out the window. She watched a group of three young witches and wizards walk away from her front gate. They could have been siblings, if it wasn't for the warmth of the two twins' features in comparison to the cool, regal features of the third. The third wizard's hand laced with the witch's. She knew those children. She had watched them on summer vacations for years. In her mind, she made note to send them a casserole or some baked goods in the weeks to come. It wasn't until the death announcement showed up in the Daily Prophet that Ms. Bagshot finally got around to it. _

* * *

**A/N: The last two chapters have been kind of short and lacklustre. I'm working on a longer one later, and considering re-writes for the earlier parts. :) Thanks for reading! xo**


	19. Flashbacks and Daydreams

**_November 18th, 1978_**

_Jules hadn't spoken to Sirius for three months. They had held hands at the funeral. She had crawled into his bed when she had nightmares. She fought Order missions along side him, but she refused to speak of the night when they had said three words that would change everything permanently if acknowledged. She was a master of putting herself in the present and focusing on what was important: fighting the Death Eaters that threatened to ruin her world and stole her parents from her. She and James had been in the north of England for a while, on the front lines with Lily and Remus fighting off the Giants that the Dark Lord had gathered up. Peter and Sirius were on protection duty in the centre of London. They tried to prevent attacks on Muggles, and with the help of Frank Longbottom and Kingsley Shacklebolt, they had found themselves quite efficient at it. It made it easier, being far away, but it also made worry an evident thing. Once they had been ordered to return: beaten, bloodied and bruised, Jules wasn't sure what waited for her. As it turned out, nothing did. He wouldn't talk to her and she wasn't much of a conversationalist._

_It wasn't until the moment she saw the curse fly through the air, leaving ripples in its wake, that she regretted her silence. She watched Sirius fly backwards. She saw his stomach seep with crimson liquid. The world fell silent in the sickening few seconds it took her to cross towards him. _

_"JULES!" James yelled as his sister stopped paying attention to the duels going on around her. She didn't flinch as bright lights of hexes crossed her path. She was running away from her Death Eater counterpart. James tossed a few protection charms towards her, while trying his best to deflect the curses being thrown at him as well. He tossed one last look over his shoulder to where Julianne had thrown herself on top of someone protectively before the world went black. _

_Lily saw James collapse out of the corner of her eye. Her heart crumbled in her chest and she turned to face him, leaving herself exposed. Remus tossed himself in front of her and shouted "PROTEGO!" to stop a similar curse hitting her. She felt her knees wobble as she watched a red liquid start to pool around his head. The world felt cold, and suddenly, one by one, the Death eaters started to disapparate. _

_"Peter!" Remus called over his shoulder as he supported Lily with his arms, "Get James!" He searched the rubble for signs of Julianne and Sirius. Lily screamed for James, Peter pulled James up from the ground and supported his unconscious body with one arm rather haphazardly. Dorcas Meadowes rushed forward and took Lily from Remus while Marlene started calling out for Julianne. Alice and Frank Longbottom pulled over Kingsley Shacklebolt. Mad-Eye adjusted his wooden leg and pulled out his sack of intermediary wizarding first aid before he could start transporting people to Hogwarts to be cared for by Madame Pomfrey. _

_"JULIANNE!" Marlene screamed as she saw her best friend covered in blood with tears streaming down her cheeks. Jules was padding up wounds that had cut through Sirius' torso. She was trembling as Sirius had fallen unconscious from blood loss. "Oh, Merlin..." Marlene started to run. "HELP! SOMEBODY HELP!" _

_Heads turned around at Marlene's shrieks. Moody apparated to Marlene and saw her as she ripped off her outer robe and applied it to the wound that Julianne was trying to hold together with her bare hands. Mad-Eye whipped out a potent dittany solution and poured it over the wound. The skin healed together in a thin layer, but it needed more and it needed more quickly. Jules tried to shake off Marlene as she tried to pull her away from Sirius' body. It wasn't until Lily's screams for her brother that Jules was able to form a coherent thought._

_"Is he-" Jules' hazel eyes met Marlene's ice blue ones. "Marley... James is okay, isn't he? He's alright?" _

_Marlene didn't say anything. She simply opened up her arms and held Julianne as she collapsed into her chest. The war was eating away at them. Julianne vowed that she'd say everything she ever had meant to say if they got through it. _

* * *

**_Hospital Wing, Hogwarts Castle, November 19th, 1978_**

_Julianne paced up and down the stone hallway outside the closed doors. Students bustled around her, asking inane questions about the former Gryffindor quidditch team captain. Finally she snapped at them, and they skittered away like scared spiders. Her nails were bitten to the quick. Her lips were chewed to oblivion. She'd raked her fingers through her hair so often that she was terrified it'd start falling out in chunks. Lily was sitting in a heap of tears on the floor while Marlene and Dorcas doted on her. Peter hovered around and was breathing so loudly that Jules contemplated placing a silencio charm around him. _

_"Eat something," Remus said as he handed her a bit of food he'd snuck from the kitchens. Jules stared at his offering and shook her head. He sighed and watched as she continued to chew her nail beds. "Jules." _

_"I'm such an idiot," She said quietly as she lowered her hands from her mouth. "Remus, I'm..." Her eyes watered up again, and she blinked back her tears. "Damn it." She muttered as she stared at the seemingly endless ascent to the ceiling. _

_"Oh, Julie," Remus shook his head. He opened up his arms and pulled her to his chest. "It'll be fine."_

_"I wish people would stop saying that," She whispered into his scratchy wool sweater. "James can't die, Moony. He can't. We're supposed to go together, when we're old and grey and-"_

_"And you will," Remus rubbed her back comfortingly. "You will grow old and grey with your grandchildren and nieces and nephews running around the house. And your kids will make jokes about how old and bitter you've gotten. And we'll all be there... We'll be on vacation in Spain... And during the night, you'll be 117.. The both of you, and you'll make snotty jokes to each other before bed. And then you just won't wake up. Because that's how it ought to be." _

_Jules laughed through her tears and hugged Remus closer to her. He buried her face in her hair for a moment and foolishly imagined that he'd go with them, because his world didn't include a world without the Potter twins in it. Behind them the doors opened. Albus Dumbledore stood in the middle of the doorway and stared at the battered youth in front of him. Lily stood from her seat on the floor. Without a word, Albus made way for the two women to rush in. _

_Sirius and James lay in beds adjacent from each other. Jules stood in between them and stared at the both of them. Their skin matched the sheets on the beds. Their hair acted as a sharp contrast. The difference between them was that James' eyes were open and staring intently at Lily. _

_"Mrs. Potter," James grinned at her. "You look far too upset, my love." _

_"Oh, you arse," Lily laughed through relieved tears. She collapsed on the bed beside him and wrapped her arms around him. He looked over at his twin whose eyes were filling with tears. He smiled at her and winked. Jules nodded and turned to Sirius who was audibly struggling for air. She took hesitant steps towards the cot he was on. She sat on the bed beside him and pushed some hair out of his forehead._

_"Listen, Black," Jules whispered. "You better wake up, and wake up soon... Because frankly, I find it a little unjust that Marlene McKinnon has had more snogs with you than I have." He didn't move. Jules glanced over her shoulders at her twin and saw that he was busy being kissed repetitively by Lily. She turned back to Sirius and leaned her head down to his ear._

_"I'm sorry," She said so softly it was barely audible. "I promise to make the past three months- no, the past two years up to you. I'm a stubborn arse sometimes and I just want you to wake up and to be alright." She leaned back up and saw that he was still unconscious. A tear slid down her cheek. She watched Lily practically crush her twin with all of her love. Jules looked down at Sirius and thought that this must be her comeuppance for the way she had behaved. Jules placed her lips against Sirius' forehead and then stood up to leave._

_Remus watched in the doorway with Peter as Julianne pressed her lips against Sirius and cried for Sirius. He saw her get up off of his bed and turn to leave. He selfishly looked forward to being the pair of open arms for her as she started to walk from the bed, and then, as thought it were a reparation payment for such a selfish thought, got to watch as his best friend's hand reached up from the bed and grabbed hers. _

_"You are a right stubborn git," Sirius said with his voice hoarse and soft. Jules stared at his hand as it trembled to hold hers. She looked up to him with her mouth slightly agape. "It's three words, Julie. You're an intelligent girl. It shouldn't take you three months of bloody buddhist meditation to say it." _

_"I love you," Jules burst out. She clapped her other hand over her mouth and didn't even think twice as she leaned down and placed a desperate, apologetic, grateful, elated, pained kisses on his lips. "I love you, I love you." She whispered as she leaned her forehead against his. Tears rolled down her cheeks and a smile spread across her lips as she knotted her fingers in his hair. _

_"You owe me a galleon," Lily whispered in James' ear as the pair of them watched Jules and Sirius make up. "I _told_ you it was a lover's quarrel and not her rejecting him." _

_In the doorway, Peter watched with astonishment as Jules continued to kiss Sirius. He had noticed that they had been fighting, but it had never occurred to him that they had been fighting like James and Lily often fought. He turned to Remus and tried to gage his reaction. Remus looked as though he was in catatonic shock. He just stared at them with his mouth pressed in a thin line. Beside the two of them, Marlene and Dorcas watched on with relieved expressions. It was the first and only time that Marlene and Dorcas felt as though the war was a winning battle. _

* * *

**_12 Grimmauld Place, November 24th, 1994_**

Julianne paced around the house endlessly. Remus and Sirius watched from the living room as she drifted from one side of the hallway to another. She wrung her hands, raked her fingers through her hair, and let out periodic sighs. Remus had his nose buried in a book, while Sirius flipped through the pages of the Daily Prophet, stopping on the article about Harry.

"Do you think Dumbledore would let me-" Jules hovered in the doorway.

"No," Both men said without looking up at her. Her bottom lip jutted out and she continued pacing for a few moments more.

"But the challenge is d-" She hovered again as she lifted her nails to her mouth and threatened to chew them.

"Dragons," Sirius said. He closed the Daily Prophet and looked up at her. "It's dragons. Harry is fourteen and he's going up against a dragon. We know, love."

"He's survived bloody Lord Voldemort thrice now," Remus said as he turned the page in his book. "What's a horntail dragon to the boy who lived?"

Julianne's eyebrows knotted together. She walked towards the sofa and plopped herself down. She leaned her elbows on her thighs and placed her head in her hands. Jules could hardly breathe at the idea of the little green eyed boy she'd taught to fly a broom being chased by a creature that blew fire. She couldn't fathom the concept of Harry being put in more danger than he already had been in his lifetime. It was her responsibility to keep him safe. James would want him safe, and yet all of Jules' efforts to render that possible backfired. She smothered. She fought for him.

"What if I just-" Jules whipped her head up to suggest something else: another crazy plot that involved Hogsmeade, invisibility cloaks or something equally as ridiculous.

"No!" Remus slammed his book shut and leaned forward. He put his hand on her shoulder. "Julie, Harry is a very talented wizard. Dumbledore will be there to ensure he gets through it alive. I have absolute faith in him. You ought to as well."

"But Moony," Jules' hazel eyes blinked a few times. "I just want to watch and cheer him on... Why can't I cheer him on? I'm sure Amos Diggory is allowed to be there..."

"Because Amos Diggory is a ministry official," Sirius said as he got up from his arm chair. He sat down on the arm of the sofa and put his hand on Jules' other shoulder. Over top of her head, he and Remus shared a look. "Because Amos Diggory didn't threaten to slice open the Fat Lady's portrait... And Amos Diggory has never hijacked the Floo Network to break into Hogwarts."

"Amos Diggory also never threatened to fillet Lucius Malfoy alive, he's never once assaulted a ministry official-" Remus continued. "Barty Crouch Sr. never had to physically remove him from a muggle suburb known as Little Whinging... Jules, you're sort of a loose canon."

"But you're _our_ loose canon, darling," Sirius said with a smile. Jules looked up at him and was still noticeably upset. She leaned her head on Sirius' thigh and let out a sigh. He moved his hand to her hair and pat her head. Remus watched the two of them as he always had with a bitter taste in the back of his throat. Two years ago, she had laid her head in his lap with the news of the Chamber of Secrets. Lucy had fallen asleep already, and Jules simply couldn't keep up her smile. Her soft hair had found itself in his hands, but now he was a bystander once again to the dysfunction that was the somehow equally frustrating and lovable Julianne Potter.

"At least Alastor's there," Sirius said softly as is fingers wrapped around a section of her black hair. Jules nodded her head and stared forward. Remus excused himself from the room after a few moments more of watching. He stood in the hallway with his chest aching before he headed upstairs to his room and locked himself inside.

Downstairs in the living room, Sirius watched Julianne lay down on the sofa. Her eyes filled with tears and she stared at the ceiling. She worked her hands over her temples and bit down on her lip. Her crow's feet adorned her eyes. Her laugh lines seemed deeper with tragedy. She turned her gaze towards his. On her ring finger she began to spin her father's mother's mother's engagement ring.

"Tell me a story," She said quietly. "I can't think about dragons or death eaters anymore, Padfoot."

Sirius lifted up her legs and sat down. He placed her legs back on his lap and began to rub her feet. He started to talk about a stone house just outside Ottery St. Catchpole. He told her that there was a vast expanse of field that connected to the Burrow. Sirius started talking about the bright red shutters and the guarded cellar for werewolf transformations. He explained to her that he imagined a little girl with thick black curls running around outside with a little green eyed boy and a set of green-eyed twins. A world where James and Lily survived the war and they all lived happily ever after.

"And Lily would go out of her mind," Jules laughed as a tear slid down her temple. "She wouldn't know how to deal with twins, but James would be expert, however overly encouraging. It'd drive poor Lils mad."

"It would," Sirius said. "And you'd love every moment of that. One day, when Lucy was four or five, we'd have another kid. A little boy and we'd call him Romulus Gideon... He'd look just like you but with my nose and jawline. Lucy'd love him, but he'd end up hero worshipping Harry and-"

"Sirius," Jules said. She propped herself up on her elbows and stared at him with a sudden urgency.

"What?" Sirius looked over at her earnest hazel eyes. She pulled herself upright and stood up. She started pacing again and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Harry is fighting a bloody dragon _right now_," She started to laugh and Sirius watched her nervously. "He's fighting a _dragon_ and all I can think about is a stone house in Ottery St. Catchpole and how much I want to live in it with Lucy and Remus and Harry and-" She inhaled sharply. "And then I remember that we've been intending to get married for fourteen bloody years... Well, I mean, two- or one and a half- if you subtract the lost years, but- Are we going to get married? Because frankly there's a horntailed dragon no doubt filleting my nephew and my brother's dead but all I can think of is how much I hate this house! I want to live beside the Weasleys and have a little mailbox with our last name painted on it and a homemade quidditch pitch and-" She stared at him. "And I want _you,_ damn it_._"

Sirius stood up from his seat. He crossed over to Jules and stood inches from her. His hand slipped around her waist and pulled her into him. His face leaned down to her level and he pressed his lips against hers. Jules let her hands travel up his chest. One of her hands wrapped itself up in his hair while the other gripped at his collar. She let herself melt into him as she'd always been able to. She felt his body against hers. His hands travelled down to her thighs and he bent down, while still kissing her, to lift her up with a slight grunt. Her legs wrapped around his waist and he walked her the few steps to the sofa. Sirius sat down on the sofa with Jules straddling his lap. His tongue hungrily explored hers. Jules' hands travelled down to his shoulders and she dug her nails into the flesh there as she pulled back, grazing her teeth along his bottom lip. Sirius pulled her closer to him and then maneuvered them down onto the sofa that he'd never dreamed he'd end up snogging on as a teenager.

It was with that thought that Sirius stopped what he was doing. He laid his forehead onto Jules' chest and started to laugh at himself. Jules kept her hands in his hair and a small smile started to play on his lips.

"Oh, Jules... Julie, I'm sorry... But can you imagine what my mother would say if she could see us?" Sirius said through his giggles. Jules started to laugh as well.

"I think she'd bloody well kill us," She chuckled. "Blood traitors sharing saliva on the Black family sofa..."

The two of them lay like that on the couch for another moment as they laughed at the concept of the wicked Walburga Black sneering at them from the doorway. After another moment the laughter died down. Sirius held himself above Julianne and then cringed. The realization hit them in the same instant.

"We have to move," They said in unison. After another moment the pair of them sat up straight on the sofa and straightened out their clothes. Silence fell upon them again. Jules looked at Sirius' profile as he ran a hand through his unruly curls.

"Is there _actually_ a stone house by the Burrow?" She asked.

"I bloody well hope so," Sirius sighed. He placed a hand on her thigh before he practically threw his head onto her lap face up morosely. Jules smiled and let herself comb his hair with her fingers. For the rest of the afternoon, Julianne let her mind wander far away from the danger that Harry was in. Instead of dragons, she daydreamed about a bright, warm country home where there would always be at least one redhead visiting.

* * *

**A/N: To Hogwarts for the next chapter! :) Hope you enjoyed reading! Please, please, pleeeease don't feel shy to leave an honest review. xox, Soph**


End file.
